W2B-025 Christmas - Animal health-0.txt
SELF HELP

By Dr. Ruth Elliott

Did you know that to some people, Christmas is a source of great stress? What a shame! It can be a very exciting time with plenty of activity, an atmosphere of hustle and bustle with people in a happy and elevated mood.

There is a saying, 'People are upset, not by things, but the view they take of them.' In other words we can choose how we wish to react to anything in life. When we think about Christmas we can choose to regard it as a fabulous time of the year, with an air of activity, a feeling of anticipation of something about to happen and a general feeling of well being.

On the other hand, we can choose to regard Christmas in a number of negative ways. I do not really like to be suggestive of any of the possible negative interpretations, but I feel it is important to recognise at least a few. For example, it is possible to become overwhelmed by the problems of Christmas shopping, sending Christmas Cards, planning Christmas outings and entertainment and sorting out family obligations and regard these in a negative manner. However we can choose instead to concentrate on the more positive aspects of these and other Christmas activities.

Christmas is traditionally regarded as a period of peace and goodwill. It is unfortunate that for a number of us, we have neglected this aspect and allowed ourselves to be carried along by various outside pressures.

For instance, take Christmas shopping as an example. I have often heard people say they hate Christmas shopping. I 'm sure you have heard this on many occasions. Now how would feel if you thought that the Christmas gift you had just received caused the giver such distress?

Would you really appreciate it? To reverse the situation, do you really want to give someone a gift if it has caused such hassle or pressure?

I can understand that for some people the fuss of crowded shops and the indecision as to what to buy for certain friends and associates can be unpleasant. However we can alter this and regard it in a more positive manner. If we decide to enjoy our Christmas shopping, find pleasure in selecting the most appropriate gift and give it in a gesture of friendship, we ourselves will gain so much more pleasure and enjoy a sense of achievement and elation.

When we decide to go shopping at Christmas, it is important to have our plans made before we start. If we make a list of names of all the people to whom we wish to give gifts, then add in some possible gifts for some, it means that at least some of the decisions are already taken. Hence we are not in the position of wandering around aimlessly. Gradually we will also be able to think of appropriate gifts for the remaining people on our list.

The same applies to Christmas cards. Again may I remind you that none of us would wish to receive a card from someone who had not enjoyed sending it or who did not mean the message on the card.

Another aspect that often makes people shudder when they think of Christmas is that so much needs to be done at the one time. We tend to leave things to the last minute, then get into a fuss. Most of us have a tendency to procrastinate at any time. More so at Christmas. The difference between Christmas and other times is that for once the deadline cannot be extended. Knowing this, one wonders is this rush at the end partly due to laziness or do we tend to keep putting things off until we ourselves are victims of the fuss we claim to dislike.

Housewives often regard Christmas as being very stressful because of the cooking involved. Some dread making the traditional Christmas dinner for months ahead. But is it such a big deal? It's no more really than a Sunday lunch and at least you do not have to rush it - no-one is going far on Christmas Day. Furthermore we should not forget the joys of cooking and the sense of satisfaction one achieves from presenting the ultimate meal. Unfortunately, like so many other aspects of Christmas, the original joys have become masked in our modern-day emphasis on actual achievement without regard for the sense of well-being that accompanies the expression of quality.

Another aspect of the Christmas season is entertaining. Many people have work outings with their colleagues. Often restaurants are fully booked at this time. Sometimes standards are not as high as usual. People who do not eat out often find this upsetting and complain. This has the unfortunate effect of spoiling the lunch/evening for others in the party.

Those who eat out frequently throughout the year accept a lesser standard - they understand that staff have problems and concentrate on enjoying themselves and not getting upset. Indeed does it have to be spot on so long as all are enjoying themselves. The important point is being together and experiencing the atmosphere which is so infectious. I always feel at this time of year, it is a pity to entertain at home as the ambience of hotels and restaurants adds to the sense of occasion and hence to our well-being. It is also worth remembering that staff outings are very important to work relationships as people are able to relate at a much more casual and relaxed level without the inhibiting effects of status and hierarchy.

Christmas is also a time for families to be together. People look forward to being united with loved-ones. Unfortunately the stresses of Christmas mar the occasion and often rows and arguments occur. These are very damaging to everyone concerned and become a further source of stress. What a pity to spoil a brief holiday with unnecessary tensions. This problem also occurs at such occasions as weddings and funerals when people who do not see each other often are together in close and unfamiliar proximity.

To many people the run up to Christmas Day is the most pleasant part of the season with people enjoying the high they get from the increased activity. As well as planning for Christmas Day, enjoying outings, organising shopping, people tend to spend money on themselves - as if they need the extra thrill that comes with spending and acquiring something new.
And so to Christmas Day. I often hear people say afterwards: "It was very quiet." It is as if they were disappointed - as if they expected the hustle of the previous week or so to continue. Christmas Day is quiet for most people Unfortunately some have a feeling of anticlimax - as if everyone else is having a better time than they. This is always a problem if one looks for the ultimate. Nothing is ever good enough.
IF we expect too much of Christmas Day and indeed any other event, we leave ourselves in the position of having nowhere to go with our emotions other than downwards - which is deflating. So, how about accepting Christmas Day as it is, not forgetting that the main purpose is a celebration of our religious heritage and enjoy it.

Finally, Christmas is followed by the New Year. An important event for us all when we become more aware of ourselves, our life and the year that has passed. It is important to use the few days before the 1st of January to reflect on the previous year and to decide how we will react within the new year. While 'New Year Resolutions' are often treated lightly, here is a wonderful opportunity to work on change. For example, many smokers choose the New Year as the date to stop smoking, people start diets, others plan changes in their work or lifestyle. There is a great power in using the New Year as the extra impetus to a major decision.

In the meantime - Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
