GRAVEL

"Sadu Sadu Saaa"

The cry arose like the chorus in a drama as Lokuhamuduruwo paused for breath. (1) Lokuhamuduruwo - High Priest When the deep voice began again Rahula raised his eyes from the fan on his lap, and started to scan the faces of the white clad devotees seated on mats in front of him.

He recognized all the bent heads. He had known them since the day he had donned the yellow robes, almost nine years ago. Velagedera Upasakamma, in spite of being the mother of one married daughter and a son just out of school, looked the same as she had done the day he had first seen her. But when his eyes landed on Asilin Nanda's head Rahula saw how strands of silver had begun to mix with black in the hair around the nape of her neck.

Suddenly his roaming eyes came to a halt as they encountered another pair on a similar mission. The dark eyes gleamed like diamonds as the full lips curved into a smile. Rahula hastily brought his own eyes back to the fan on his lap.

He realized with annoyance that he had begun to sweat and that his heart beat had quickened to twice its normal rate. Raising his eyes once again to glance at that particular corner of the banamaduwa he was relieved to find the owner of those bright black pools had now focused on the carvings on the wooden pillar, against which she was leaning her right shoulder. (2) banamaduwa - Preaching Hall
The girl looked his age. She was apparently a stranger and not much of a pious Buddhist, for she seemed to be more interested in her surroundings than in what Lokuhamuduruwo was saying. He noticed that even though she was clad in white, her dress was different from that which the girls of the village wore. "It almost grew on her." The phrase came into his mind out of nowhere. He was horror stuck.
Lokuhamuduruwo was right. It was not good to read too many detective stories. Especially English translations. And he had committed another sin. He had stared at a devotee of the opposite sex with interest. What would Lokuhamuduruwo say if he knew?

Later on, as Rahula stood beside Lokuhamuduruwo listening with half an ear to what was being said to the Wedamahathmaya,(3) he saw the girl again. She was leaving with the headmaster's wife and their daughter, Kanchana. As they began to descend the steps she turned her eyes slightly and glanced at Rahula. Unable to bear the gleam in the two black pools he brought his own to the ground in front of him. When he was sure she could no longer be seen, he turned away from Lokuhamuduruwo and went in search of Gunapala.

Rahula found him chatting to some of the boys from the village. He was admiring Sirisena's new bat. Rahula stopped. He did not want to break the innocence and the magic of the world of childhood that surrounded the group - a world he too had entered and begun to discover when an ill-fated horoscope had intervened to push him out at the age of five.

They had already sensed his presence and were breaking up. Soon Gunapala was standing next to him wondering what Rahula wanted.

"It's getting late. Everyone has left. Let's go in," he said placing one hand on Gunapala's shoulder. Together they turned towards the avasageya.(4)

"Today there was a quite a crowd."

"Ump." Gunapala kicked a stone on his path.

"I saw some new faces as well. Wonder who they were?"

"I saw no new faces. Did Hamuduruwo see Sirisena's bat? He says it's the type of bat real cricketers use. I said it's not true and that its bad to lie on Poya(5) days."

'Its not only on Poya days that you have to be good," began Rahula, but checked himself before he would commence a long sermon. It was nine-thirty. Lokuhamuduruwo must already be in bed, listening for their return. He made one last attempt.

" I forgot to ask from the headmaster about next month's pinkama.(6) Ah by the way he had someone else with him, a girl with longhair. She didn't utter a word of gatha.(7) Such people should not come here at all."

He paused and hoped Gunapala was too young to realize where his real interest lay.

"That must have been Asanthi Akka.(8) I met her at the pond with Kanchana Akka this morning. She is from Colombo. She is a relation of Kanchana Akka."

So she is from Colombo, mused Rahula that night as he tossed and turned in bed. Whenever he dozed her face floated in front of him. Once he dreamt she was standing near him in the banamaduwa with a book in her hands. She was asking him something when suddenly he saw Lokuhamuduruwo standing behind her. Rahula woke up in a sweat, and began to mutter every gatha he could remember. "I am a monk. Monks do not think about girls," he told himself over and over again.

The days that followed were an agony. He had seen her twice. The first time was when he had gone to the almsgiving by Asilin Nanda.(9) Throughout the time Lokuhamuduruwo had preached his sermon, Asanthi had kept her eyes on his face. He could not understand her. How could girls be so bold? Why did she look at him in such a way? He hoped Lokuhamuduruwo would not notice.

The second time they met there had been only the three of them, Kanchana, Asanthi and Rahula. He saw them walking1owards him as he was returning from the sick bed of Justin. Rahula bent his head and decided to walk past them with as much speed as he could gather. He quickened his pace with his eyes firmly focused on the stones that lay on his path. He felt the girls' presence by a strange sweet smell. The smell of jasmine, but much stronger. "One, two, three more steps and I will have passed them," he said to himself with relief.

"Hamuduruwane,(10) are we having the Pali classes tomorrow?"

Rahula stood still. Then slowly he turned towards Kanchana.

"Yes of course. There's class tomorrow."

Even though he kept his eyes on Kanchana's face he saw Asanthi standing next to her. He could feel the big black eyes sizing him up.

"I won't be able to come, Hamuduruwane. I'm leaving for Colombo with Asanthi tomorrow."

"Oh, that's quite all right," said Rahula staring at the paddy fields behind Kanchana's head.

"We"ll be going then, Hamuduruwane."

He bent his head again. But before his eyes turned to the ground they wandered towards Asanthi's face. They lingered there for a while before he drew them once more to the gravel on his path. He wondered whether the girls could hear the beat of his heart. Behind him he heard Asanthi say something to Kanchana. He strained his ears to listen but could not catch her words, nor Kanchana's reply.

Now, as he swept the bo leaves from the viharageya,(11) he wondered if he'd get to see Asanthi again. Gunapala had heard from Sirisena that she would be leaving with Kanchana for Colombo that afternoon. He realized that he was sweating and he glanced around him, fearing someone would read his thoughts. Whenever Lokuhamuduruwo spoke to him he tried not to look at his face, afraid those kind but stern eyes would see into his heart.

At ten in the morning he was asked by Lokuhamuduruwo to go to the junction to post a letter. His path lay along the pond where the villagers bathed. Long before he reached the place, he heard shouting and laughter.

"Here this one is for you." Rahula knew the voice was Amal's.

"What about me?" He heard a girl whimper.

He came to the clearing and saw Amal on the big mango tree picking mangoes. Kanchana stood below, trying to catch them into her cupped hands. A few feet away from her stood Asanthi, balancing on a fallen branch, her arms outstretched. Near her stood Asitha with a broad smile on his rugged, good-looking face. As Rahula watched, unseen by the performers, Asanthi lost her balance, swerved first to the left then to the right. Asitha moved closer. She grabbed his shoulder, kept her balance and looked triumphant.

Rahula retraced his steps, grateful for the ovitiya(12) bushes hiding him. He was glad he had an hour's walk halfway across the village to reach the post office. In his mind over and over again, he saw Asanthi's long smooth fingers curling round Asitha's shoulder.

Bending his head, he let his eyes fall on the gravel on his path. Gravel, that's what should be in his heart, he wished wistfully.

Aditha Dissanayake

Notes
(3)	Wedamahathmaya 	-	Practitioner of Indigenous Medicine (4)	avasageya 	-	Monastery (5)	Poya 	-	Full Moon (6)	Pinkama 	-	Part of Temple Festival (7)	gatha 	-	Stanza (8)	akka 	-	Elder sister (9)	Nanda 	-	Aunt (10)	Hamuduruwane 	-	Polite form of addressing a Priest (11)	viharageya 	-	Temple Premises (12)	ovitiya 	-	bushes Bush with purple coloured flowers
