Hushed Voices: Incest of Children in Sri Lanka

The project report submitted by Shamendri Issadeen (Registration Number: 40703220) as a partial fulfillment of the course, Advanced Reading (LSD 1202) of the Diploma in English Programme, 2007/2008. to The Department of Language Studies of the Faculty of Humanities and Social Sciences of the Open University of Nawala.

"The Grizzly Bear is huge and wild; He has devoured the infant child, The infant child is not aware He has been eaten by the bear."

- A. E. Houseman

Acknowledgements

I wish to acknowledge the Open University of Sri Lanka, Nawala for providing me with the opportunity to follow the Diploma Course in English. I would also like to thank Ms. S. Pathirana, the course coordinator and Ms. R. Anath, the subject coordinator, for their help and guidance during the process of this project.

I would also like to express my thanks to Dr. Devan Pillay, Director, ESCAPE and all other members of the above organization, the National Child Protection Authority (NCPA) and the PEACE organization for providing information, giving access to their libraries and support.

A special note of thanks goes to Ms. Nayani Ford, for the help, support, encouragement and time given to me throughout the process of preparing this project report. Finally, I thank my mother, Ms. R.I. Issadeen, for the very helpful constructive criticism and the love and care given to me always.

Shamendri Issadeen

21.03.2008

CONTENTS

Page

1. Background																			1

2. General Characteristics of Incest Victims					3

3. The Perpetrator																	6

4. Nature of Incestuous Sexual Behaviours					7

5. Impact on Children															8

6. How Can the Society Help?											10

7. Bibliography																			13
Hushed voices: Incest of children in Sri Lanka Background

Background

The making of a good society depends on the sound development of its children. The child held a very important role in traditional Sri Lankan society as it was a symbol of the fortunes of the family. Any family without children indicated bad luck or misfortune of the wedded couple, as the society expected successful familial life with children of its people. This does not seem to be the case in present times as life as a whole seems to have changed for children and adults. Children are regularly being subject to different forms of abuse by adults of which incest is a form that has been reaching high rates due to many reasons in recent times. According to a sample study conducted by the Centre for Women's Research (CENWOR), every year a staggering 10,000 girls in Sri Lanka face sexual abuse by their relatives in families where the mother has taken up overseas employment, with more than half the rapes committed by fathers. According to this organization, since those affected are mostly minors and as the law lacks teeth, only around 100 cases are registered annually. During the past five years 512 cases have been reported and 54.5 per cent of these reported cases were committed by fathers. According to the chairperson of the country's premier child rights NGO, Protecting Environment and Children Everywhere (PEACE), Maureen Seneviratne, the worst sufferers are girls in the age group of 10-14. (Asia Child Rights, 2004)
Incest is a particular type of sexual violence against a child, usually occurring within the family context (Peters, 1989). Vanderbilt, 1992, p. 51 defines (as cited in McClendon, 1991) incest as: ";the sexual abuse of a child by a relative or other person in a position of trust and authority over the child. It is a violation of the child where he or she lives - literally and metaphorically. A child molested by a stranger can run home for help and
comfort. A victim of incest cannot". Additional definitions by Caruso, 1987 (as cited in McClendon, 1991) include the following characteristics:

•Sexual contact or interaction between family members who are not marital partners;

•Oral-genital contact, genital or anal penetration, genital touching of the victim by the perpetrator, any other touching of private body parts, sexual kissing and hugging;

•Sexually staring at the victim by the perpetrator, accidental or disguised touching of the victim's body by the perpetrator, verbal invitations to engage in sexual activity, verbal ridiculing of body parts, pornographic photography, reading of sexually explicit material to children, and exposure to inappropriate sexual activity.

A majority of reported incest victims are female children. All cases of incest may not necessarily involve female victims, as incest against a male child is also possible, but these cases are very largely under reported (Silva, Herath, Athukorala, 2002).

The Penal Code in Sri Lanka was amended in 1995 so as to enhance penalties for rape and criminalize incest, trafficking of women and sexual harassment. Sri Lanka is also party to important instruments such as the Convention on the Elimination of all forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW, 1981), Vienna Declaration on the Elimination of Violence Against Women (1993) and the Beijing Declaration and Platform for Action (1995)(Silva, et al.,2002) In spite of Sri Lanka's well known achievements in quality of life, literacy and health affecting both male and female sections of the population, children continue to experience several disadvantages. The appalling truth is that children who are subjected to abuse do not know^do not even partially comprehend the extent of the damage being done to them as persons with rights to their own bodies, their integrity and wholesomeness, by the abuse perpetrated upon them. They are so young, so small, and so vulnerable (Seneviratne, 1997).

involved are the victims may be more subject to under-reporting in view of it being considered less serious as issues like unwanted pregnancies or premature loss of virginity are unlikely to arise in such cases. This in turaf may suggest that male-to-male sex between close relatives often are not considered to come under the purview of the legal framework for dealing with incest, even though in the eyes of the law such relations too should be treated as incestuous. While the under-reporting of incest cases where male children are involved as victims could be possible,due to the given reasons (it could be considered that the incest problem in Sri Lanka is largely one where the girl child becomes the victim or passive partner (Silva, et al. 2002).

A majority of children become victims of incest at a very young age. While incest victims range from the ages 3 to 17, most of them are subjected to incest as small children and perhaps do not understand what is happening. Incest tends to peak at the age of 11 and thereafter decline. This could be due to the reason that once the children are old enough to understand or resist incestuous advances by a family member it becomes less common. The first sexual encounter with a close relative occurs mostly before puberty for girl children (Silva, et al. 2002).

Many incest cases are reported from depressed social and economic backgrounds. These families show characteristics such as high degree of unemployment or casual employment, congested or poor housing space where sleeping space is limited, manifestations of social breakdown including alcoholism, family disintegration and widespread poverty (Silva, et al., 2002). However, one cannot say for a fact that incest is not prevalent in families of relatively stable backgrounds, or even middle class or upper middle class homes. It is an issue that cuts across all socio-economic groups. As incest is considered a disgrace to the family and many Sri Lankan societies tend to deny the fact that such a problem does exist, so many incest cases from stable economic backgrounds are not

As incest violates a child's very personhood and innocence causing emotional, sometimes physical and mental pain, it is very important to identify the nature and extent of incest in Sri Lankan society. The manner in which it affects the girl child, who often becomes the innocent victim of incest and adverse outcomes that follow on discovery of incest, need to be addressed with equal importance. It is most often a well guarded family secret which silences the voice of the child often to haunt the child as he or she grows up. So it is evident that the rights of a growing number of children of the Sri Lankan society are being continuously taken away from them and they are abused in many ways, hence depriving them of their basic human rights.

General Characteristics of Incest Victims.

Incest victims show many characteristics that are almost always the same in most of the cases reported. Characteristics of incest victims such as gender, age at sexual debut, socio-economic background, type of family and educational achievement are some of these and they could be understood by studying the reported cases (Silva, et al. 2002).

When taking into consideration the key features of reported cases of incest in Sri Lanka it is evident that an overwhelming majority of the reported victims are females. However, male children too fall pray to incest and, most often than not, the perpetrator is an adult male. Two alternative explanations may be possible. First, this is in fact the actual pattern; female children being more vulnerable given the male domination within the Sri Lankan family. Alternatively, cases of incest where male children

reported. Also relatively stable families back away from taking legal action due to the fact that it could break up the family and bring shame to the family name.

There are many types of families in which incest takes place. A relatively few cases have been reported from families where both parents of the affected child remained within the family when compared with the number of cases that have been reported when the mother of the affected child was not present due to Middle East migration, death or separation. A lesser number of cases have been reported from families where the father was absent. The absence of parents, the mother in particular can be seen as a major risk factor leading to incestuous advances of other family members towards the child (Silva, et al. 2002). CENWOR's project coordinator Lilangi Wanasundara says, "Mothers leaving homes as migrant workers have caused fissures in Sri Lankan society in a major way, especially in the rural areas". Psychology lecturer at Colombo University, Asantha De Silva says, "In most cases, what happens is that once the wife starts sending money from abroad, the husband gives up his job and hits the bottle. With the man spending most of his time at home, the girl child becomes the victim of this changed lifestyle" (ACR, 2004). In an article by the Asian Human Rights Commission (2004), the story of 14-year-old Nilmini is captured for us. She is undergoing rehabilitation at a home for teenage pregnant mothers run by the NGO, Sarvodaya, in Lunawa as she was raped by her father while her mother was abroad. After her mother left the country, Nilmini did all the household work. That is when her father started abusing her sexually. The cruelest part is that in 2003 November she gave birth to her own father's son (ACR, 2004). "Given the magnitude of the issue, it is obvious that unless the government steps in and does something, crimes against girls will only increase," says Neetha Ariyaratne, the secretary of Sarvodaya. According to the Women's Affairs Minister, Amara Piyaseeli Ratnayake, the plight of the girl child is a

special area that needs everybody's attention as there is an increase in crimes against them, especially incest (ACR, 2004). Thus, it could clearly be seen that the departure of mothers to the Middle East leaving behind their children, daughters in particular, in the care of other family members, has had a considerable impact on the incest situation in Sri Lanka.

The educational achievement of affected children is another appalling fact that needs to be dealt with. Incest victims are by and large, poorly educated. Often revelation of incest and the stigma associated with such revelation as well as their transfer to childcare centres prevent the affected children from continuing their regular school education. Incest therefore contributes to the disruption of the education of the affected children (Silva, et al. 2002).

The perpetrator

Incest is an activity that is perpetrated in secret. The offender is often in a position of trust, and always in a position of power, in relation to his or her victim (Pandey, 2005).

Father abusing one's own daughter is the most common form of incest. This is followed by the stepfather or an uncle abusing the child. In some cases multiple members of the family such as the father, grandfather and the uncle or the older brothers tend to sexually abuse the child. In the latter case, the older male siblings quite often watch the father or uncle abuse the younger female sibling and experiment with the female sibling. In some cases, with time this behaviour becomes something very normal and as a result the female sibling goes through multiple abuses. All most all incestuous relationships hold a common feature where an older male member of the family sexually abuses the girl child and sometimes the boy child (Silva, et al. 2002). However, there are many cases of incest involving female perpetrators which many people in society are not aware

of or which are not considered very seriously as the child involved does not show signs such as loss of virginity or pregnancy. Another factor contributing to this is that females are considered to be loving and sensitive care givers of the society from ancient times. And this leads to the false belief that females, such as mothers, aunts, sisters or even grandmothers do not or will not sexually abuse the child. One cannot say the above for sure as women too sexually abuse children even though it is not as prevalent as abuse committed by men. In the case of a woman abusing a child it is mostly emotional incest. This is when a parent relates to a child as a substitute for a partner, the child may become emotionally bonded to, and codependent with the parent. This is more common between a mother and her oldest son. Even without physical sexual contact, the consequences to such "bonded" children include a lifetime of partnership difficulties (Wikipedia, 2008).

Nature of Incestuous Sexual Behaviours

Perpetrators show many kinds of sexual behaviours.
First, older males who commit incest against family members make maximum effort to maintain secrecy about this behaviour in view of shame associated with the act, possible consequences from other family members, possible legal consequences and being ostracized by the community. Approaching children when they are still very young especially girls, committing sexual acts when the child is at sleep and intimidation of the victim are different means used by the perpetrators to maintain the secrecy of the act (Silva, et al. 2002).
Second, the incestuous males often perform their sex acts under the influence of alcohol. Alcohol may be used as a means of overcoming any inhibitions relating to such sex acts (Silva, et al 2002).

Third, the passive partner in incest cases is typically a girl child who is much younger than the active male partner (Silva, et al. 2002).

Fourth, the passive partner is often initiated into sex via incest (Silva, et al. 2002).

With regard to incestuous behaviours, two types of sex acts have commonly been reported. One type of behaviour involves sexual play, while the other form is penetrative vaginal sex. While the former mainly involves girl children who have not attained puberty and the incestuous male does not want to cause'serious' damage to the victim who is obviously an immediate family member, the latter type appears to be more common where the kinship relation is more distant and where the child is older and perhaps at least partially responsive to the act. However, there is no clear-cut distinction between these two types of acts and the former can easily progress to the latter once the opportunity permits it (Silva, et al., 2002).

Impact on Children

Children who have been sexually abused through an incestuous relationship often suffer even after the abuse has ended. Some of the damage caused is obvious while some are not. Children may suffer from psychological impacts such as: guilt, shame, grief, anger, helplessness and depression. While, condemnation and being ostracized by other family members, disruption of schooling, loss of virginity, illegitimate teenage pregnancy, adverse health conditions, drug and alcohol abuse, fear of intimacy, suicidal thoughts, long-term mental illness and institutionalization are the physical impacts and changes that the child incest victim has to face (Silva, et al.;2002,-Pandey, 2005). When considering psychological impacts, children may feel guilty as they tend to believe that they are responsible for the act in some way or the

other. The guilty secret may also make them feel worthless which results in shame. Fear, is a fact that keeps them from reporting the abuse to another adult. They may also stop seeing the world as a safe and friendly place as the abuse is done by a trusted adult. Intense and uncontrollable anger could also be felt and these result in the child showing anger to the wrong people-most often the mother. They may even hurt themselves or a pet. Depression could make the child sad, withdrawn and less playful resulting in the lack of interest in school and other activities (Pandey, 2005).

Physical impacts and changes are other facts that merit consideration. Condemnation of the child may take place when he or she reports the case to another adult. The child is ignored and the event is covered up in view of stigma, increased tension and possible breakup of the family following public knowledge of the situation. This could result in the child dropping out of school due to the inability to face society. An unclean feeling could also be felt by the child due to the loss of virginity. Illegitimate teenage pregnancy could also contribute to dropping out of school and serious physical damage to the girl child as her body may not be ready for such functions. The child may also get subject to sexually transmitted diseases which results in adverse health issues. Drug and alcohol abuse is another side effect of childhood incest. This too adds to the sad reality of these innocent children. Victims of incest tend to show a fear of intimacy even in a marital relationship as they grow up, as most sexually abused victims do. This greatly affects the victim's marital life and could result in the break up of the married couple. Hence, once again the victim may lead a sad and lonely life. This fact and many others could also result in creating suicidal thoughts in the mind of the victim. All of the above factors together could contribute to long-term mental illness of the child which most often than not continues to adulthood and as a result the victim is

institutionalized until recovery or sometimes even till death (Pandey, 2005,'Peters, 1989).

How Can the Society Help?

Taking into consideration all of the above facts, one wonders if children in the Sri Lankan society could be kept safe from such abusive relationships. As a society we should lobby against incest and raise awareness of the issue among the decision-makers and the public, including potential victims. While the legal framework is currently available in Sri Lanka, enforcement appears to be weak due to various factors as discussed above. Often incest is not taken seriously by the relevant law enforcement agencies.

There are many changes that should be done in hospitals, police stations, probation services and other institutions dealing with these cases. Child health care centres and hospitals should provide counseling to the affected child, referring all child victims of incest to law enforcement agencies and giving appropriate training to all staff members in dealing with victims of sexual violence and to deal with effected children sensitively and efficiently. Another important step that should be taken is to increase the number of Children's Desks in police stations, raise awareness among the police staff about the legal provisions against incest. Probation officers need to be trained to effectively address the needs of victims of sexual violence (Silva, et al. 2002).

As the school plays an important role in a child's life there are many changes that need to take place in these institutions as well. School counseling services for children need to be expanded while children should be made aware of dangers of the society. In the case of incest, they should be taught how to avoid possible abuse by trusted adults as children are always taught not to trust strangers. Staff members should try to avoid

any kind of prejudice towards victims and they too need to be educated about legal provisions against incest as most children who are incest victims report abuse in their homes to their teachers at school (Silva, et al. 2002). Teachers need to be made aware of behavioural changes that may give them a hint of a child facing abuse at home.

Non Governmental Organizations play an important role in helping victims of incest. They, too can help to improve the current incest situation in Sri Lanka by increasing the number of crisis centres, allocating more resources for Non Governmental Organizations involved in child protection services and advocacy and improving quality of services provided in child care centres and crisis centres for women (Silva, et al.; 2002).

It is heartening to know that a police hotline for sexually abused victims has been in place during the past few years and it shows that steps have been taken in order to create awareness. However, it needs to be brought out to the public in a more effective manner by using different communicative media such as television, radio or even by the use of posters in public areas.

In spite of all the above suggestions eliminating incest is not easy, as putting all of the above suggestions into practice will definitely take a long period of time and a lot of effort and dedication. In addition to the above problems the following fact plays an even more major role in barring this battle against incest as the perpetrator is almost always an adult that the parents or parent trusts and one the child feels comfortable or secure with. Even though the task of preventing such situations seems daunting, the immediate necessity, as mentioned above, is to raise more awareness, to address reality that such an evil does exist, and work together as a community to prevent it and to recognize children who are often 'not heard' and to speak out in defense of them, so as to make sure that these

children who are the future of our nation grow up in a safe and secure environment.

"Perhaps we cannot prevent this world from being a world in which children are tortured. But we can reduce the number of tortured children. And if you don't help us, who else in the world can help us do this?"

Albert Camus (Word Count: 3522)

Bibliography

Pandey, V. C. (Ed.)(2005). Child counseling. India: Isha Books.

Peters, D.B. (1989). A betrayal of innocence: What everyone should know about child sexual abuse? New York: Word Publishers.

Seneviratne, M. (Ed.). (1997). Wednesday's children: Some case studies of sexually exploited children. Colombo: PEACE Publications.

Silva, K.T.; D. Herath, & V. Athukorala. (2002). Ravaged innocence: A study of incest in Sri Lanka. Colombo: Centre for Women's Research (CENWOR).

Websites

Asian Child Rights. (2004, January 14). Sri Lanka: Battling Incest in Sri Lanka [News]. Retrieved March 11, 2008 from http://acr.hrschool.Org/mainfile.php/01617259

Incest. (2008). Retrieved March 11, 2008 from http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Incest

McClendon. P. D. (1991, November 23). Incest. Retrieved March 13, 2008 from http://www.paseptll.org/info/incest.htm
