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Writer Appreciation
Story of the Week: "The Awakening"
May 14, 2013 / Anthony	/ 2 Comments
Hello fellow bloggers! I ought to stop calling it Story of the Week if I haven't been writing an entry every week, right? It's a catchy title, though, and it's fun too.
Today, I will take a look at The Awakening by Kate Chopin. As a feminist and proud supporter of women's rights, this novel strikes a chord in me. Published in 1899, it functions as a wondrous starting point for the literary theory of feminism, as well. Feminist studies, as they developed and grew in prominence through the 20th century, owe some of their significance to Chopin, whose novel attracts readers of all perspectives through its strong protagonist in Edna Pontellier. However, it would be a crime against the novel's intrinsic greatness to study it solely as a piece of feminist criticism. With that said, I will be discussing The Awakening as a psychological piece, as the psychological side of the novel tends to also attract readers.
After the break, I will begin with some feminist criticism.
The Awakening's protagonist, Edna Pontellier, is the focus of the novel, as she partakes in an internal journey to "awaken" from the social structures that she, and thus by relation women of her time, have suffered through by the patriarchy. Thus, the narrative largely focuses on Edna's journey of enlightenment, and how she reaches that point. Ultimately, the way in which she becomes enlightened makes the story so sensational and intriguing. The plot details add to the social commentary that Chopin is arguing.
Edna first moves to New Orleans with the hopes of escaping a familiar structure that would normally force her to live and survive on a farm for the rest of her life in Kentucky. She realizes that that kind of life is not ideal for her, so she makes a change. She marries Leonce Pontellier, a man whose social status attracts her. In reality, Edna harbored no love for her husband, Leonce, and wanted to escape the monotony of Kentucky in the only surefire way.
By the middle of the novel, Edna is experiencing some mental difficulties, so to speak. Leonce begins to worry for his wife, who begins to distance herself from New Orleans culture and society. While New Orleans is usually depicted as a partying place with happiness and carelessness abounding, the novel takes a secondary perspective of the city. In a similar way that Tennessee Williams' A Streetcar Named Desire analyzes New Orleans, The Awakening focuses on the outskirts of the city, and the depression that comes from underneath. Edna begins her transformation here, while she distances from society. It is while she is away from the world that she realizes how much control society has in enforcing its norms and standards. Thus, Edna serves as a feminist icon for trying to alter the societal corruption of females.
Edna undergoes a series of tests that ultimately serve as stepping stones on her journey of enlightenment. Most importantly, Edna learns to swim. By learning to swim she is learning to survive in a world separate from society, the natural world. Edna's ultimate ending once again pays attention to Edna's learning to swim earlier in the novel. It is a sort of reciprocal ending, but even the most uninsightful of readers can realize that her suicide of sorts is a symbolic way for her to finally escape society, through water and nature. By drowning at the end, Edna manages to escape the patriarchy. Otherwise, she would not have been able to live the way she wanted to, which was her "feminist goal." Being able to do whatever she would want to would prove to the reader that she has achieved freedom and equality. However, Edna realizes that it's impossible for her to achieve that desired freedom. For one of the first feminist novels, Chopin really shines and illuminates the struggle that late-19th century had to endure to achieve basic human rights, the kind of rights that white men have had for centuries.
One of the biggest conflicts for Edna involves her marriage to Leonce. Originally, she had married Leonce to escape Kentucky and head to a more lively place where she could live a vibrant, free life among the party-people of New Orleans. Unfortunately, her ties to Leonce burden her ability to be free. She first experiments with a known-womanizer named Alcee while Leonce is on a business trip in New York. At this time, Edna wishes to experience the different kinds of love available to her. One of the most important aspects of being free, she believes, is the freedom to love. Her marriage impedes that freedom. Marriage, a social custom, impedes Edna's sexual desires. Whether she is justified or not may come up for debate, but on the feminist interpretation of the novel, Edna should be able to experiment how she likes such that she can defy the dominant, patriarchal, systematic society that controls her every move. Would a man be punished equally for the same crime? Even the partying atmosphere of New Orleans doesn't seem to promote her freedom, as her friend Adele, who represents a sort of societal conscience for Edna, denies she meet Alcee, who has hooked up with just about every other girl in the city.
A better question to ask in this situation is, do Edna's restrictions and limitations reveal a greater problem for female equality? In the late-19th century, women were forced into roles, while men were able to choose their destinies, so to speak. Women were bred to be mothers and caretakers, stay-at-home parents who raised their children and made their husbands happy. Edna is a proper example of a female lead who neglects that role, and searches diligently for a new one in New Orleans. The character of Edna Pontellier played a large role in establishing different gender roles for women in the United States. While The Awakening was censored upon publication for its stark portrayal of a strong female protagonist who defied the roles she was intended to fit into, it became a popular hit regardless of its censorship.
Another important question to ask regarding the novel would be: For how long has female sexual desire been revealed and explained so openly? In America, the answer is simple: since Kate Chopin. In her short story "The Storm," Chopin pays further attention to sexual desire in women. Previously, both male and female authors tried to limit their depictions of females desiring anything aside from the pleasure and happiness of their husband and children. Is that fair? Not really. For years and years, authors of all origins have written freely about male sexual desire. The Awakening seeks to awaken America, and the world at large, and show them that females can crave and lust for things just as freely and openly as men. At the time, the novel was considered unethical and immoral. Now? The times have changed, and a new appreciation for The Awakening has developed. The times have certainly changed since Chopin's era.
Next in the story, Edna meets Robert Lebrun, the true source of her "awakenings." In Robert, she sees something unique and charming. Robert represents what she really, truly desires outside the realm of marriage. Robert presents a tough task for Edna, to decide what she wants in life. From there, she awakens. Her enlightenment begins from meeting Robert and partaking in sexual relations with him. Those relations intensify as her awakenings become more apparent and real; the paralleling of these two is intentional. The more Edna meets with Robert, the more she neglects her children as well. Is it okay to neglect your children, even if it is to prove a point?
At this point, in my opinion, Chopin begins to shine as a writer. Her style really takes shapes as she describes the massively changing feelings which Edna experiences. Edna's complications with her marriage and Robert add for great content to write about, especially as Chopin's lyrical narration shows it all. If you are interested in a unique narrative style, Chopin's The Awakening is worth the read. While reading, I felt as if the author really enjoyed what she was writing about, as if the social issue of gender injustice was clawing at her throat for so long and the only way to present her argument came in the form of a creative novel. And what an argument she presented! So incendiary that it caused censorship upon its initial publication!
While Edna's relationship with Robert escalates, she is visited by her dear friend, Adele, who I mentioned earlier. Adele clearly symbolizes the perfect female ideal of that time period. Despite their friendship, Adele and Edna butt heads in direction. While Adele cares for her husband and children, Edna would prefer to stay with Robert, and pretend they never existed. It makes for a great side-conflict, and by the end of the novel the side-conflict comes to the forefront of the plot. Adele and Edna are clear symbols, in this case, which Chopin must enjoy manipulating through her intricate plot of self-discovery and awakening.
Robert eventually flees to Mexico, under the guise of a business opportunity. He is a hard-working businessman and, at times, he must leave on a whim and pursue such ventures. However, unbeknownst to Edna, Robert uses the business opportunity as an excuse to leave New Orleans, as he sees their relationship as a failed endeavor because of Edna's marriage. Meanwhile, with Adele telling her to conform and Robert gone for the foreseeable future, Edna turns to Mademoiselle Reisz, who is receiving letters from Robert. Reisz serves as an ideal for Edna to strive for, as a foil to Adele. Reisz plays music, acts freely, and enjoys life. Eventually, Reisz reveals to Edna her letters…and in them, Robert proclaims that he is still thinking about Edna! What a surprise!
With renewed hope, Edna perseveres. Eventually, Robert returns. At the same time, Adele is having a baby in the hospital. While Robert proclaims his love for Edna, Adele is going through the final stages of childbirth. Robert explains to Edna why he left her, but then Edna is called to by a letter from Adele. She leaves Robert and visits Adele at the hospital, as she had promised she would do. Edna returns home to find Robert gone, with a letter telling her that he has left forever.
Then, she swims out to the Gulf of Mexico and drowns in the same waters she had awakened from earlier in the story. Tragic ending! Does this decision promote the idea that there is no room for a free, independent woman in that society? Does it promote depression, tragedy, and conformity? Ultimately, I believe that the ending serves as a glimmer of hope. Obviously, Chopin used the setting for Edna's first awakening to show a sort of reciprocal turn of events. The hope comes from Edna, who is now free from the world. Although she is dead, she successfully managed to escape everything she wanted to escape from. Adele would no longer want her around, and the love of her life had disappeared forever as well. It's a tragic ending, but it leads to, in my opinion, a mature decision on Edna's part to finally escape the world she so wanted to live without. Does that decision make her weak, or strong?
Now, there are many symbols, aside from the characters, that are worth talking about in this novel. Throughout the story, the narrator relates Edna to that of a white bird. That bird flies freely above the world, above society, and does what it pleases. At the onset, Edna is compared to a bird that is imprisoned. If the bird is able to escape the prison, it can fulfill its dreams. However, while stuck in that prison, the bird cannot fly, nor can it move or interact with others. Even at the start, while Edna follows her family through Kentucky, she is tied down by social constraints. She escapes Kentucky only to be put into a larger cage, in a marriage with Leonce. Has she escaped? No, not yet. In her house, away from family, Edna keeps birds of her own. She is visited by birds, too. The influx of avians and more seems to prove that the protagonist really dreams of becoming just like them. Or perhaps she is one of them, but is limited by a broken wing, thus making her weak?
When Edna commits suicide by drowning, she uses courage to do the deed. However, as she passes downward into the depths of the sea, the narrator says: "A bird with a broken wing was beating the air above, reeling, fluttering, circling disabled down, down to the water." The bird, in this case Edna, has perished completely.
This story is truly intense and worth reading yourself. I hope my post here has helped you all understand the story better, or has convinced you to pick it up. Until next time, friends!
Story of the Week: "The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn"
May 1, 2013 May 8, 2013 / Anthony	/ Leave a comment
Today, I will be talking about one of my personal favorite classics in Huck Finn. What a book! Also, I apologize for not posting much. I've had too much to do recently, with finals approaching and preparation for summer (job hunting, internship searching, etc.) occupying my time. I've spent a lot of my time on this blog preparing this post. I love this book, and I hope you will appreciate it more after reading this!
Now, I want to mention that this book is highly controversial. It features the n-word over 200 times throughout. However, it reveals the racial ignorance and delusion in the antebellum American South in a unique and revealing way. It uses satire and seriousness to show this point, which is common of Mark Twain, the author. Racial ignorance and stereotyping was everywhere in the American South during this period. The genius of the book is in the way in which the author reveals said ignorance, through the incredibly compelling main character.
Clearly, Huck Finn is an American classic, similar to the Great Gatsby, which I talked about last week. And while the ending may depreciate the overall quality of the novel, the rest of it remains endearing and intellectual all the same for readers to enjoy. One of my old English teachers used to say: if you turn your brain off for the last part of the novel, you'd enjoy it a lot more than if you had it on.
Alright, no more ranting about the unfavorable ending! Time to provide background!
Mark Twain, if you haven't heard the name or read his fiction before, also called Samuel Clemens in some parts of America, is a true gem of satire and fiction. Much of his work comes – or at least is partly inspired – from the experiences of his own life, growing up in the 19th century in America in Mississippi. Twain was upset with the world as he was writing. Although he grew increasingly cynical as he aged, it came from his dissatisfaction with the state of public opinion. He saw Huck Finn as a novel capable of changing American society for the better, towards more racial acceptance, and towards a more negative and cynical view of the era he lived in. Unfortunately, the societal change would come posthumously. Twain wrote Huck Finn with all the intention in the world of creating the Great American Novel. Did he achieve it? I'd say he did.
In my opinion, much of the greatness of the novel comes from its perceived innocence and adventure at the inset and its intellectual enlightenment and fulfillment by the outset.
The story is about young-but-ignorant Huck Finn, previously seen (chronologically speaking) in The Adventures of Tom Sawyer. He enters a physical, mental, and moral journey that takes him from Mississippi to the Deep South of antebellum America. Most critics, including myself, see Huck Finn as a classic tale of a young character losing his/her naivety and innocence as he explores a mature, ever-changing world.
At the onset, Huck is part of a religious, theological world. He is under custody by the widow. Although she is well-meaning, she controls him and his development, ensuring he follows the (somewhat corrupt) morals of the world. Twain is a notoriously hard critic of organized religion, and expresses that through Huck's orphan parents here. Ultimately, Twain is a satirist so it's important to remember that whilst reading. Of course, if you are sensitive about the effects that organized religion had on the "justification" for slavery in the South, I recommend taking Twain's points lightly.
The plot of Huck Finn is truly its highlight, in my opinion. Although The Catcher in the Rye and To Kill a Mockingbird are renowned by critics for their "loss of innocence" stories, I believe that Huck Finn is the greatest example that American literature can provide. While the story is primarily about Huck and the slave Jim, it talks to the entirety of social change and development in the 19th century.
In an unfortunate turn of events, Huck Finn's father returns when he discovers that Huck has a lot of money stored in the bank, and wants to claim it at his legal, rightful guardian. The unfortunate part is that his father is an alcoholic child-abuser, and will soon be taking Huck away from his guardians (who weren't necessarily the best kind of people in hindsight, but kept Huck "civilized" and "stable" while he was with them). Huck didn't want to be civilized by his guardians anymore, but he also didn't want to necessarily return to his father, who only wanted him for his money. Thus, he devised a plan to escape from his father and exploit his drunken tendencies. As he escaped from the small hut/house that his father built by a stream, away from civilization, Huck triumphed by outsmarting him. A rite of passage!
He escapes to Jackson's Island, where he stumbles upon someone who will change his life forever – and no, not a future romantic interest. Huck Finn's previous guardians owned a slave named Jim, who had a family but was removed from it by the people who bought him. Of course, Huck Finn stumbles upon Jim. Huck was always taught by his guardians that slaves were lesser people. They shouldn't be trusted, respected, or talked to. But, because of his innocence and supposed "immaturity" and "uncivilized" nature, Huck looks past those thoughts and thinks of Jim as a human being. Thus, the story of Huck Finn is under way.
And that's only the beginning. From there, it only gets better (until the ending) and from there, you see the relationship of a "dumb, stupid, uncivilized boy" named Huck Finn and a "dumb, stupid, uneducated slave" named Jim develop into respect, admiration, and bonding. The moral circumstances of this friendship are profound. Mark Twain's point lies in the fact that the only person capable of seeing the truth, the enlightenment of things, is a young immature uncivilized boy who can barely read and write. It is when one is resistant to the education that culture and society demands of a "civilized" boy that you begin to break the mold. And Huck Finn certainly breaks many molds as he travels down a river, on a raft, with a slave.
As Jim and Huck travel down the river, they plan to take the Ohio River back up to free territory. Unfortunately that doesn't work out for them, as they miss the spot they needed to go to. Instead, they end up traveling down the Mississippi River into the Deep South. During the day, Jim needs to hide. He is a slave who Huck's previous guardians and town officials are looking for. Huck's father is looking for him. Everyone's looking for something, and they need to stay safe. When it's nighttime, they are free to roam. This is a symbolic contrast, present in the novel because of Twain's brilliant satirical background.
The novel is dominated by symbolic contrasts. Along with the contrast of night and day, civilization and nature are also significant. As the shade of night protects the duo from harm and being caught, so also does the river. The Mississippi River is Huck's protective parent. The sides of the river, which are inhabited by towns and people, are dangerous. The river, which is an embodiment of nature, instinct, and impulse, is kind. Keeping in mind that the book was written before naturalism became a study, this is a pretty profound development. Although naturalists believed that nature is unforgiving, unpredictable, and ruthlessly uncontrollable, the roots of the study lie in Huck Finn, in my opinion, because of the great attention that Twain places on nature.
Huck notices these contrasts and adapts to his environment very quickly. While he's around robbers and felons, he's quick on his feet. There's one instance early into the novel where Huck and Jim encounter a sinking boat on the side of the river. As they look closer, there's three thieves in there debating their shares of the rewards and money they just stole. Meanwhile, the ship is sinking. They don't realize that. Huck does. Huck also realizes that Jim needs to be safe, so he leaves the ship when he can't find Jim there. This small story is another example of Twain's indictments of human behavior. These thieves may be cunning, but not particularly bright. They lack common sense. Huck, on the other hand, is cunning, but also realizes that he's going to sink with the ship if he doesn't get off soon.
Another example of Huck thinking quickly on his feet occurs when some local town officers try to examine his raft. There's a tent in it, and Jim hides in there. Huck doesn't want the officers to reach Jim, by no means. For that reason, he can't have them search the small tent he's in. So, in classic Huck fashion, he claims that his family is in the tent, and that they have smallpox. He says it's very contagious, and that he might have it too, so it's best they leave the raft and not catch it from him or his family. Genius.
This is the kind of maturation that Huck needs, and it's ultimately what he gets throughout the journey. While his guardians wanted to teach him reading and writing, he wanted to go into nature, into the world. He's realistic, understanding, and mature, though. At the end of the novel, the reader understands that no one else really shares in Huck's realistic maturity. Huck is uniquely intelligent yet uncivilized.
Although I've disparaged the ending of Huck Finn quite a lot so far, I did enjoy Huck's eventual revelation. He abandons Tom Sawyer.
In The Adventures of Tom Sawyer, we see a host of random fantasy out-of-this-world adventures courtesy of the Romantic hero, Tom Sawyer. Mark Twain denied and disliked the Romantic movement of the early 19th century. He disliked it so much that, in Huck Finn, he has the main character, who by now is seen as someone capable of understanding and acting upon complex moral situations at such a young age, defy Romanticism completely. He does so by abandoning Tom Sawyer, the Romantic hero. While it is arguable that Tom is a complete, all-encompassing Romantic hero (I'd hardly give him the title 'hero' to begin), he certainly serves to embody the values of Romanticism.
The Romantic movement valued aesthetics, emotion, and feelings. It enjoyed the natural and reveled in the supernatural. From Romanticism, people value staring off at a setting sun over the horizon, enjoying the overflow of emotion and thought as you sit there. A Romantic poet would ask for you to record your feelings verbatim. Romanticism also asserted the importance of nationalism. Now, why does Tom Sawyer embody this movement?
Tom Sawyer is usually the source of great, bounding, incredibly unnecessarily complex ideas and plans to either get money, honor, or some kind of fantasy. He's big on fantasy. The entire imagination of Romanticism comes directly from Tom. As the novel nears its end, Tom is reintroduced. It spirals downward at this point. All of his complex ideas represent Romanticism. And, when Huck is finally fed up with Tom and his fantastic plans, he abandons him in an ultimate act of maturity and defiance. Not only is he defying all of Romanticism, but society as a whole. At this point, Huck is truly individualistic. He has the choice to go back home, but he refuses. He doesn't want to be trained to be civilized any more.
How about that? What a great piece of fiction! If you've read it, I recommend you do so and immediately spark up a conversation with me about your thoughts. I'd love to hear them. As this is one of my favorite pieces, I enjoy discussing it in deeper detail. And although this piece is somewhat long, I've only touched on the novel's surface. There's so much more to talk about!
Until tomorrow, fellow bloggers!
Story of the Week: "The Great Gatsby"
April 14, 2013 / Anthony	/ Leave a comment
I wanted to coincide this post with the publishing of my poem, "Gatz the Great," but then I got very sick. Instead, I am posting this almost a week late, and I feel embarrassed for that. However, the series goes on!
Last time I did a story of the week post, I talked about three books that had a significant impact on my knowledge of English literature. I discussed One Hundred Years of Solitude in great detail and campaigned for people to read it. Now, I will be discussing a more well-known, popular book, I believe. The Great Gatsby is a perennial novel. It transcends its time period and has great importance in American literature. When I read it for the first time, I knew I was reading something special, something great. Gatsby!
I'm sure almost everyone on WordPress has read this book or have been exposed to it before this post. I'm not sure whether I'll be able to shed new light on it, but I do want to showcase my appreciation for F. Scott Fitzgerald's greatest work here.
While although I can summarize the plot fairly quickly, there is much more to be analyzed about the plot within. One of my greatest praises for the book–and one I'm sure others share as well–is how, in its shortness (it rounds out at around 200 pages usually), it manages to create one of the most realistic, intriguing, and complicated scenarios in American literature. A man who has returned from WW2 (Jay Gatsby) seeks to find his pre-war lover again (Daisy Buchanan) and discovers that she lives in New York City with her husband (Tom Buchanan.) He moves to NYC in an effort to rekindle their flame.
At its most basic level, that is the plot of The Great Gatsby: a love story. But it's also a tale of redemption, economic pursuit, cultural gratification, popularity, the American Dream, and others. I enjoy this book because it seeks to create a simple and understandable narrative with a much more complex thematic and symbolic infrastructure. Because the story is about love, it will stand the test of time. But because the story is about much more than just love, it will be read in literature classes for many more years.
One of the essential structures created by Fitzgerald is the dichotomy of Old Money versus New Money, used symbolically through the novel. This dichotomy was at its most prominent during the Roaring Twenties of American history, when America was supposedly at its economic and cultural peak, and when this novel takes place. Simply put, Old Money represents people who inherited their money and did not work for their wealth. New Money represents people who participate in shady or opportunistic practices in order to make a name for themselves, and to reach wealth. In New York City, the section or town of West Egg is dominated by New Money and East Egg by Old Money. The Buchanans live in East Egg, and Gatsby lives in West Egg. The distinctions are clear, then.
However, with all this said, we are leaving out who, arguably, the story is all about! The narrator! Nick Carraway, the relatively modest neighbor of Gatsby in West Egg, comes from the Midwest to study at Yale. There, he meets Tom Buchanan. Nick is Fitzgerald's way to epitomize the (somewhat) upper-class shooting for the American dream. Nick, and one other character who I have yet to mention, are America.
When Nick comes East to NYC, he has grand ideas for how successful he may end up becoming. Along the way, he realizes, through a few important events, that the American dream he had been shooting for was a myth, an illusion all along. It was not within his reach because Old Money was always there to blast his dreams to peaces, or perhaps the dreams of some of his friends.
Nick Carraway learns from Gatsby, as he also learns from Buchanan. Because he is friends with both of them, he is capable of seeing through both of their eyes, capable of understanding them. What he discovers by the end of the novel is what makes it all worthwhile. Nick is my personal favorite character in this novel.
George Wilson, a car garage owner in the "Valley of Ashes" (more on that later), is married to Myrtle Wilson. The Wilsons are the other half of the American dream: they represent the lower class attempting to reach impossible heights. George Wilson buys the garage with hopes that he can achieve economic stability and possibly prosperity somehow. However, he is exploited by Tom Buchanan for his cars, while Tom is also having an affair with his wife, Myrtle.
It's one giant jumbled and complex situation that ultimately goes to show that the American Dream is, in the end, a farce. Fitzgerald believes that so long as Old Money has authority over the world, the presence of New Money will never be respected or successful.
And then there's Gatsby, the titular character with a knack for economics who ruins his own dreams by believing too much in the power of love in a much-too-civilized world. His life depends on the past, and not on the future.
If you haven't read The Great Gatsby before, I recommend you pick it up. It's a perennial classic, and for good reason. It is a Great American Novel in itself. My favorite part of the book is not the complicated plot or anything like that, it is the writing style of Fitzgerald. He writes beautifully. Every sentence he writes feels alive, vibrant. There's a classic quote on nearly every page.
For those of you who have read the book before, and have studied it diligently, you know that I have left much out of this review. Too much detail and information can, at times, be overwhelming. Especially with this book!
I hope you all enjoyed this latest Story of the Week segment, I know I did! If you'd like, I love to chat with commenters about literature so drop a comment and we can do just that!
Thanks for reading, and until next time!
Story of the Week: "One Hundred Years of Solitude"
April 1, 2013 April 1, 2013 / Anthony	/ 11 Comments
This is going to be a long one.
Throughout my time reading books, I've stumbled upon three that mean the most to me. These books have been, above all else, of paramount significance to me; one has shaped how I read, one has shaped how I write, and one has shaped how I think.
The first book, the one which has shaped how I read, is The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain. The second book is The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald. The third one is the masterpiece I'm about to analyze and review here.
You're probably wondering, how can a story like One Hundred Years of Solitude change how I think?
You probably haven't read it, then.
The book takes place in the small town of Macondo over the course of one hundred years. The Buendía family settles and resides in this town in the middle of nowhere, expecting prosperity and homeliness. Originally, the settlement has zero contact with the rest of the world. The Buendía family, with its patriarch José Arcadio Buendía, makes this settlement with high, almost utopian hopes after leaving the town of Riohacha. But there is so much more to it than that!
From there on, José Arcadio Buendía and his wife, Úrsula Iguarán, ensure that the utopian land of Macondo becomes a positive place for their family to be born in and live in. Along the way, many, many new people join the town, and it grows to a point that they had never dreamed of. The town becomes a representation of not just a utopia for their family, but the Latin American world at large. It comes to be a place of immigration, emigration, and innate prosperity all through itself.
Macondo, the setting of the story, is an interesting, confusing place to the people who live there. Rarely does anything stay the same. At its core, it is place where growth occurs. The inhabitants of Macondo seek refuge, but also security and growth. It experiences all that the world has to offer it, in terms of what a story can handle. It changes, progresses, grows, matures, develops, and becomes every bit as real as any other place. The world centers on Macondo.
As a note, because this book takes place over the course of one hundred years, you meet many people with many names. The book chronicles many generations of the Buendía family as they live and prosper, so to speak, in Macondo, which is intended to represent a fictionalized, fantastical version of the country that Gabriel Garcia Marquez grew up in, Columbia. Probably the most confusing and limiting part of the book is the usage of similar names. For example, you meet a host of Aureliano Buendías and José Arcadios, as well as some Aurelianos and Aureliano Josés. It's a confusing book at first, but you grow into it as you read and immerse yourself further into the story. It is worth your attention to naming, regardless of how confusing it may seem at first. The confusion, even, may add to the reading because of how things may seem to blend together, as they should after a certain point in the book.
Obviously, I admire this book. However, it deserves your attention because of everything it does right. The author, the great Gabriel Garcia Marquez, writes beautifully. A lot of his great, romantic-style writing blends from the translation of the novel from Spanish to English. (If you can read Spanish, it is worth reading as a companion to the English version, I think. I've studied Spanish for five-six years and know it reasonably well, and reading both versions has enlightened my perception of the language used in the novel. I recommend that to anyone.) As well, the plot is brilliant. It delves into political complexities, emotional and familiar controversies, the magical and mystical fantasies of the people, and more. It studies the way people behave, human nature, the nature of a community, Jungian & Freudian psychology, theological studies, postcolonialism, imperialism, impressionism, modernism, postmodernism, family structures, militarism, and an innumerable amount of other ways to perceive it. In the end, though, the story is about the nature of solitude and isolation. Everything else, then, stems from that. A study of one seemingly simple concept turns into a study of the entire human race in a masterful, almost mystical story of a family that's just trying to live.
In fact, a few people from the class I studied this novel in originally had written a paper and presented a thesis proclaiming that Marquez illustrates Albert Einstein's theory of relativity, the Big-Bang theory, and includes studies of black holes. It was so convincing that it floored me. With an author like Marquez, anything is possible.
Marquez writes in a way akin to many of the other writers of the Latin American Boom of the 1960s: he writes about the magical, but portrays it in such a matter-of-fact, realistic way that it seems every bit as real as anything else you read in the novel. The term magic realism stems mostly from Marquez's writing because of its popularity to readers.
Magic realism is astounding at first, but it will grow on you as you read it. I recommend reading a few of Marquez's short stories to get a hold of his writing, too, if you have the time and motivation to truly understand this man's genius.
In the end, One Hundred Years of Solitude holds a special place in my mind when it comes to literature. If I have hyped it enough for you, I hope you get the chance to read it as well. It's worth your time, I'm sure. If not, perhaps in the future you will read it!
Until then, that's all for now. If you've read the book before and would like to chat about it, drop a comment and I'll gladly talk more!
Next week…Gatsby! Stay tuned, folks. See you next time.
Story of the Week: "Benito Cereno"
March 25, 2013 March 25, 2013 / Anthony	/ 2 Comments
Story of the Week is a new feature I'll be running here! Here's the idea: I'm fairly sure that I read more than the average person nowadays, so why not record those readings on this blog? Reading is a great part of my major, my interests, and my life, so it fits seamlessly into the rest of my activities. Who can deny the unique feelings exuded from reading a great story? I'll be recording my experiences reading great stories and explain why you all should read them, too!
Avid readers and students of literature should easily recognize this legendary American storyteller, Herman Melville, with utmost appreciation, respect, and reverence (in my humble opinion). After having read Moby Dick in full twice, I ventured into other Melvillean stories, such as Bartleby and Benito Cereno. Unfortunately, I finished Bartleby weeks ago and had not had this blog around that time so I was unable to record my feelings toward that story! However, I finished Benito Cereno today.
Not many would claim Melville to be the most audacious and diversified of authors: while he is a unique storyteller, most of his stories share the same style and idea. Cereno captures the seafaring tales of Moby Dick and the barefaced, mundane essence of Bartleby into one. At times, the story can drag, but it is a short one that is worth the time spent reading if not only for the ending and the mysterious reveal midway through the story.
The story of Cereno is simple. A Massachusetts whaling ship captain (sound familiar?) named Amasa Delano, who is traveling in his Bachelor's Delight at the beginning of the story, meets the master of the San Dominick named Don Benito Cereno off the coast of Santa Maria. Captain Delano visits the San Dominick and observes much of the activity going on around the decrepit ship. Delano is confused by the state of the suffering ship. He wonders much about Don Benito and his captaining skills, but nonetheless urges the crew of the San Dominick that he will help their ship return to form. Don Benito is constantly accompanied by his young black slave named Babo, as well. Mystery, suspicion, and secrecy pervades Don Benito's atmosphere, as Delano mentions throughout his time meeting with him. Slowly but surely, the story tenses and much of the plot thickens. Without directly spoiling anything, I can remark that Melville puts his all into this story to startle the reader. While the story may seem dry through the first half, the second half picks up rapidly and leaves the reader with a more than satisfying ending to boot. The first half's dryness begins to make sense, and it all comes together brilliantly!
Benito Cereno is written with attention to detail and hypothetical imaginations; essentially, it is Melville. While I won't say that this is his best story – that's his greatest work, Moby Dick, by a great margin simply because of its astounding significance to American literature – Melville shines here, as he always has.
I had an entertaining time reading this story. I recommend that the readers of this blog check it out if they haven't already. Apparently, most people have read this story in high school once in their lives. Being younger than most students of literature, I can see that this post may be bringing up unfortunate memories of having been forced to read this inconceivable story during your sophomore year. If you were in that situation, I pity you! The story is a demanding one. However, if you are familiar with Melville, you won't find this story to be too difficult of a read. While it may be a bit more difficult than Bartleby, it's the same as Moby Dick in style. It's about 80 pages in my edition, which is not very long from my experience of reading stories.
Try it! Read it! Experience the story!
Next week, I'll be talking about One Hundred Years of Solitude in detail while I read my next story, which I won't unveil just yet! Solitude is a beautifully written novel by Gabriel Garcia Marquez, who I wrote about in a previous post here. More people need to experience it.
Rest in Peace, Chinua Achebe
March 24, 2013 March 24, 2013 / Anthony	/ Leave a comment
On March 21st, 2013, great author Chinua Achebe died in his home. He was 82 years old, and a legendary author of his time. I have not read his works, but I know many who have been touched by his acclaimed novel, Things Fall Apart.
This post comes a little late. He died three days prior to today, but as an aspiring writer I am more than obligated to pay homage where homage is certainly due. The time of a post should not dictate the significance of it.
I have read the novella Heart of Darkness. Much of the controversy surrounding the novella stems from Chinua Achebe's harsh, intellectual criticisms. When Achebe published Things Fall Apart, the possibilities for literary criticism about this novella exploded. In my opinion, both works are significant and great. This man deserves your respect, especially after death. He has mine.
Inspiration from Wordsworth!
March 6, 2013 March 6, 2013 / Anthony	/ Leave a comment
To my followers and readers, you'll soon understand that I enjoy and respect a variety of different writers for their talents and influence on me. I recently wrote a post wishing Gabriel Garcia Marquez a happy 86th birthday, and now I want to examine another great writer, but from a different time period. William Wordsworth, who wrote primarily in the 19th century, co-developed the Romantic literary movement with Samuel Coleridge. As poets, they sought to restore the world back to nature, to re-examine the things we take for granted, and to appreciate the world blooming around us. However, this movement grew around the time of the Industrial Revolution. One can view Romanticism as a backlash against Industrialism. It was a battle of human development versus nature itself.
William Wordsworth wrote one of my all-time favorite sonnets in iambic pentameter about the subject of nature and its place in a human-dominated world. I would like to share this poem with everyone, for many may have forgotten it. Although it applied the most in the time of the Industrial Revolution, its significance does not diminish over the course of time, for humanity has continued to industrialize and materialize through time.
As well, I would like to point out that this sonnet served as inspiration for my other poem, "Down the River". I had been reading from Wordsworth in English class while I wrote it.
And now, for the sonnet: "The World Is Too Much With Us". Enjoy!
The world is too much with us; late and soon,
Getting and spending, we lay waste our powers;
Little we see in Nature that is ours;
We have given our hearts away, a sordid boon!
This Sea that bares her bosom to the moon,
The winds that will be howling at all hours,
And are up-gathered now like sleeping flowers,
For this, for everything, we are out of tune;
It moves us not. –Great God! I'd rather be
A Pagan suckled in a creed outworn;
So might I, standing on this pleasant lea,
Have glimpses that would make me less forlorn;
Have sight of Proteus rising from the sea;
Or hear old Triton blow his wreathèd horn.
I hope you all continue to appreciate nature. What is your interpretation of this great sonnet by Wordsworth? I'd love to hear what people have to say regarding it.
Happy Birthday Gabo!
Today is a significant day in the world of literature. Today marks the 86th birthday of Gabriel Garcia Marquez, winner of the Nobel Prize in Literature in 1982. If you have ever had the pleasure to read one of Gabo's great works, you should easily recognize the importance of this man. In my opinion, he ranks as one of the greatest writers of the past century. While in recent years he has been suffering from dementia, Marquez should be recognized for his amazing contributions to literature. He epitomizes greatness. His legacy is enormous, and will continue to grow as more readers discover his works. I hope that other writers will be able to share in my appreciation of this writer's works.
So, what's the significance of this author to me? Well, simply put, he made me want to study literature more deeply than I ever had before. The complexity of his works astounded me. Never since Faulkner have I encountered an author so profound and ascertainable yet brilliant all the same. After reading One Hundred Years of Solitude, I was convinced that I had read the greatest achievement in literary history. What a novel! It has so much untapped meaning and so many possibilities for interpretation. The perspectives that people in my class were able to take in understanding the novel surprised me but made my experience in reading all the sweeter. Ever since reading that novel, I have regarded Gabo as an extraordinarily complex and unique author that everyone should have the experience of reading from. You owe yourselves to pick up one of his books. He deserves all the praise that he is given.
And, to end this post meaningfully, I will enclose a quote from Solitude that I believe best illustrates Marquez's writing and ideas:
"He dug so deeply into her sentiments that in search of interest he found love, because by trying to make her love him he ended up falling in love with her. Petra Cotes, for her part, loved him more and more as she felt his love increasing, and that was how in the ripeness of autumn she began to believe once more in the youthful superstition that poverty was the servitude of love. Both looked back then on the wild revelry, the gaudy wealth, and the unbridled fornication as an annoyance and they lamented that it had cost them so much of their lives to find the paradise of shared solitude. Madly in love after so many years of sterile complicity, they enjoyed the miracle of living each other as much at the table as in bed, and they grew to be so happy that even when they were two worn-out people they kept on blooming like little children and playing together like dogs."


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A unit will soon deploy with the newest night vision devices that can take troops from 'marksman to expert'
PEO Soldier FWS-I nightvision demonstration
An armored brigade combat team headed to South Korea later this year will take with them the Army's most advanced night vision optic, a binocular device that includes thermal imaging and connects to the soldier's weapon with a camera and sight picture that feeds into the goggle display.
The Enhanced Night Vision Goggle-Binocular has been touted by commanders including Army Chief of Staff Gen. Mark Milley over the past year as a leap-ahead technology in night vision.
Army infantry, Rangers and Marines have tested the device, which is expected to be with the unidentified ABCT by October.
"I have used the goggle. I have shot [with] the goggle. It is better than anything I've experienced in my Army career," Lt. Gen. James Richardson, deputy commander of Army Futures Command, said in recent congressional testimony.
Soldiers, Marines try out new device that puts 'mixed reality,' multiple functions into warfighter's hands
The system melds navigation, targeting, situational awareness and communications into a single device with advanced thermal and night vision.
A big change for soldiers familiar with the current and older versions of night vision is the color they'll see when looking through the tube.
No more green glow. The ENVG-B uses white phosphorous tubes.
"It's been so successful with our Rangers and our infantry, that they've been using this night vision goggle in the daytime on the ranges," Richardson said. "And they've gone from marksman to expert. It was more than we thought it was going to be from a night perspective."
The armored brigade soldiers will be among the first of 10,000 close combat soldiers to receive the new goggles over the next two years. Marines will field 3,100 systems over that same period.
The key marksmanship feature is the addition of the Family of Weapons Sights-Individual and Rapid Targeting Acquisition. Demonstrated to Military Times in early 2017, the system uses a wireless connection between a rifle-mounted camera and the goggle to give the shooter a clear, focused, video-fed sight picture.
Shooters can choose between full goggle view, full weapons sights view or a picture-in-picture mode that allows them to see both views at once.
That means a soldier or Marine can fire from the hip about as accurately as from the shouldered position at close ranges. They can also fire around corners or other obstacles without exposing themselves.
The thermal capabilities of the ENVG-B let troops see through dust, fog, smoke and other obscurants and select from black, white-hot or white-outlined features for thermal vision.
This capability going to armored brigade soldiers later this year, and Marines soon to follow, is one iteration of a larger project still under development that would add even more features in the coming years.
The Integrated Visual Augmentation System, recently demonstrated for select media at Fort Pickett, Virginia, uses the Microsoft HoloLens as a platform to feed in all of the ENVG-B features mentioned here.
It also includes navigation aids, maps, chat communications over either dedicated wireless internet for training or radio frequency for real-world operations.
The IVAS, expected to be through initial testing phases in the next 18- to 24-months, will also allow for video recording, eye tracking and muzzle placement so that commanders and trainers can conduct detailed after-action reviews of small unit tactics.
About Todd South
Todd South has written about crime, courts, government and the military for multiple publications since 2004 and was named a 2014 Pulitzer finalist for a co-written project on witness intimidation. Todd is a Marine veteran of the Iraq War.
Army finally picks an optic for Next Generation Squad Weapon

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaCommonCrawl


With his Apostolic Letter of October 11, 2011,Porta Fidei. . . , Pope Benedict XVI declared that a "Year of Faith" will begin on October 11, 2012 and conclude on November 24, 2013. October 11, 2012, the first day of the Year of Faith, is the fiftieth anniversary of the opening of the Second Vatican Council. . . (Vatican II) and also the twentieth anniversary of the Catechism of the Catholic Church. During the Year of Faith, Catholics are asked to study and reflect on the documents of Vatican II and the catechism so that they may deepen their knowledge of the faith.
"The 'door of faith' (Acts14:27) is always open for us, ushering us into the life of communion with God and offering entry into his Church."-Pope Benedict XVI, Apostolic Letter Porta Fidei for the Indiction of the Year of Faith.
The upcoming Year of Faith is a "summons to an authentic and renewed conversion to the Lord, the One Savior of the world" (Porta Fidei 6). In other words, the Year of Faith is an opportunity for Catholics to experience a conversion – to turn back to Jesus and enter into a deeper relationship with him. The "door of faith" is opened at one's baptism, but during this year Catholics are called to open it again, walk through it and rediscover and renew their relationship with Christ and his Church.


If you were to corner five professional house painters individually and ask them what their job entails, you would more or less get the same answer from each of them: They paint houses. But in the world of the record producer, the job description isn't always so clear. If you asked Steve Albini what he does when producing a record, you would be told that his duty is to "capture" the band's performance as honestly as possible. If you asked Dr. Dre, he would likely respond by writing you a beat and giving the "okay" on the font used in the liner notes for your debut album.
What a producer's exact role is defined as varies greatly not only from producer to producer, but also from producer to artist. Different artists demand different treatment and, moreover, different artists need different treatment. Fred Gaisberg, who ran the first recording studio in the 1890s, was responsible for guiding opera singers closer or further away from the gramophone's horn to match the dynamics of the score. The stereotypical Hollywood big-wig "fabulous, baby" producers from days of yore, when not chewing cigars on plush leather couches, oftentimes were responsible for everything from talent-scouting and band development to management of resources and mediating contract disputes.
Major hip-hop producers of today are key creative figures and vessels for product marketing. But, though the definitions of "producer" are constantly changing, there exists a huge semantic dispute within our industry as to what the definition of producer should be and, even, to what degree is it ethical to position yourself in the musical process.


The preview of the trip to Fleetwood.
Peterborough United return to Sky Bet League One action on Sunday when they travel to Fleetwood Town (3pm) and manager Grant McCann has almost a fully fit squad to choose from for the clash at Highbury.
Fleetwood progressed into the third round of the Emirates FA Cup following a 2-0 victory over Hereford United on Thursday night. They will face Leicester City in the third round in the New Year while Posh will travel to Aston Villa.
Posh are without the services of striker Junior Morias due to injury, but McCann confirmed he is nearing full fitness. "He is chomping at the bit, but we need to be careful with him, we don't want to get him back into the side early and then he has a setback. He is a good lad though and understands the situation." Liam Shephard is back in training after a muscle injury while defender Jack Baldwin is available after serving a one-match suspension.
he likes of Jordy Hiwula and Baily Cargill will be hoping to keep their place after being recalled, but with only three days between games Rosler may elect to recall Kyle Dempsey, Markus Schwabl and Nathan Pond - all of whom were rested in midweek. Conor McAleny (ankle) and Bobby Grant (knee) have been out since October and remain sidelined.
"We can't look at Leicester now. My focus is on Peterborough this Sunday and it's important that we do everything right from now until the match. It's important we go into the game with momentum," Fleetwood boss Uwe Rosler said.
Posh have been given an allocation of terrace and seated tickets.
A student discount is available on the day from Fleetwood with valid ID priced at £10 for standing and £12 for seating. Tickets are on General Sale. Tickets are available at www.theposhtickets.com, via the Ticketmaster hotline 0844 847 1934 (calls cost 7ppm plus your network access fee) and in person at the ABAX Stadium Box Office.
Sunday's referee is Anthony Backhouse.
Posh come from behind to secure fine win.
Wonderful threee points for Posh after fighting performance at Highbury against Fleetwood Town.
Peterborough United secured an unlikely three points as Grant McCann's men came from 1-0 down and 2-1 down to score twice in the last three minutes to earn a remarkable 3-2 victory at Fleetwood Town and despite some scary moments at the back at times, Posh held on for back to back wins for the first time since the end of August in all competitions.
Posh were dealt a huge blow inside the opening few minutes with Gwion Edwards struggling with a foot injury. Danny Lloyd was his replacement as Grant McCann was forced into a very early change. Lloyd made a busy introduction and after seeing an initial shot blocked, he toe-poked wide on the volley from around the penalty spot after Marriott's cross was only half cleared.
Tafazolli sent a downward header straight into the arms of Cairns on 25 minutes before Marriott fired wide of the near upright with a shot from a tight angle. The deadlock was broken on 28 minutes as Posh were punished for a series of errors, Penny lost the ball on the half-way line, the hosts were stronger in the tackle and then a weak Tafazolli clearance was straight into the path of BELL who drove low into the bottom corner.
Maddison saw a free-kick well claimed by keeper Cairns after Da Silva Lopes had been upended around 30-yards from goal. Cole fired wide on the turn on 35 minutes after Taylor could only prod clear a cross from the right.
O'Neill was cautioned for a poor foul on Lloyd on 37 minutes. Marriott saw a shot deflect wide for a corner kick before Tafazolli nodded the set-piece across goal. Posh wanted a spot-kick on 41 minutes as Lloyd took a tumble in the box, but referee Anthony Backhouse waved away the claims.
Dempsey saw a 25-yard effort gathered by Bond after Penny was dispossessed. Three minutes of added time was signalled by the fourth official, but nothing of note occurred. On 55 minutes, Posh levelled the scores and it was two in two for Michael DOUGHTY who nodded into the net from a wonderful cross into the box from Maddison.
Jermaine Anderson replaced Da Silva Lopes in the second change of the game made by manager McCann. Posh should have had a penalty on 64 minutes as Glendon clearly took down Lloyd in the box, but incredibly the referee waved play on. Doughty fired over from long-range on 68 minutes.
Maddison then clipped the top of the bar with a swerving effort from long-range after finding some space 35-yards from goal. Fleetwood got their noses in front from a set-piece, Bond made a fine save to deny a towering Pond header at the back post and BOLGER was there to rifle home the rebound for his third goal in two games.
Ricky Miller immediately replaced Tafazolli as Posh went three at the back to try and get something from the game. Sowerby struck the crossbar from a free-kick on 85 minutes after Taylor had been penalised for a foul on the edge of the box.
Posh levelled on 87 minutes and it was another fine assist from Maddison, raking pass to MARRIOTT, he took a fine first touch and flicked the ball past the advancing keeper for his 18th goal of a remarkable season.
Incredibly two minutes later, Posh were in front as Maddison's free-kick from long-range was spilled and LLOYD was there to gobble up the chance to give Posh the lead. Four minutes of added time was indicated by the fourth official.
Cole struck the bar deep into stoppage time with a header as Posh desperately tried to cling on to the points and cling on they did.
Fleetwood: Cairns. Coyle, Bell, O'Neill (sub Sowerby 63min), Eastham, Pond (sub Hunter 90min), Dempsey, Burns (sub Hiwula 58min), Bolger, Glendon, Cole. Unused subs: Neal, Maguire, Schwabl, Cargill.
Posh: Bond, Hughes, Tafazolli (sub Miller 80min), Taylor, Penny, Grant, Da Silva Lopes (sub Anderson 60min), Edwards (sub Lloyd 6min), Doughty, Maddison, Marriott. Unused subs: O'Malley, Baldwin, Forrester, Kanu.


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World News: Wars, Politics, Economy
The attorney who has eaten the case file was sent to a narcological clinic.
24 of May 2018 28 of May 2018
Kuntsevsky District Court sentenced a lawyer who had eaten administrative materials during the meeting, to a fine of 50 thousand rubles and treatment in a narcological clinic.
In December 2017, a lawyer Maxim Bushin defended the women's case in Filevskiy District Court - she was threatened with the deprivation of a driving license for refusing to examine for alcohol in the blood. He asked the judge to get acquainted with the case file, and then tore out sheets with measurements of the breathalyzer and ate them.
The lawyer Maxim Buschin who ate the materials of the case was fined
A criminal case against Buschin was opened for obstructing the administration of justice (art. 294 part 1 of the Criminal Code). The defendant pleaded guilty. The court appointed a fine of 50 thousand rubles
Copies of the destroyed materials were directed to the traffic police. The woman who was defended by the lawyer eventually lost her license for 20 months and received a fine of 30 thousand rubles.
Kaley Cuoco city of birth
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Don't beat yourself up. You can only do what you can do. Your post alone have help many people. Have you considered a live in nurse? When my father in law first came to live with us, after one week I told my own daughter, when it came time to put me in a home. I know I won't feel that way then, but now while I can still think, I told her I would not hold it against her. You are doing a wonderful job with your dad. Don't beat yourself up. You also have a life to live.
It's more than o.k. not to bring your dad back to your home, so that you can be the only caregiver and not be able to do anything but that. Everything changes with time, and he'll get good care in the nursing home. You've done an extraordinary job with him over these past years, and you are not superman, a trained nurse, or even expected to be the caregiver at this stage. Don't beat yourself up.
Chuck, I've been going through a similar situation (although not quite so dire as your father's) with my mother these past couple of months. She's 92 and has lived alone in her own home near us, and wore one of those medical alert buttons for emergencies. On Oct. 22 she fell in her bathroom sometime in the early morning but didn't use her button. Somehow she crawled to the phone and managed to call me. When I got there she was lying beside her bed with just a pajama top on. The bathroom was a mess.
The EMTs took her to the ER and she was admitted later that day to the hospital. She was there three days and during that time the doctors determined she'd had a mild heart attack. She was doing fine the first couple of days but developed delirium the day before she was to be discharged to rehab. I've since read that this is quite common with the elderly because they become disoriented by the strange surroundings. When we left the hospital and arrived at rehab she was really angry with me because she thought she was going back to California that day—we live in Texas.
Everyone at the nursing/rehab facility has been extremely helpful, but I'm most grateful to the physician who was on call at the hospital that weekend when she was admitted. She recommended that my mother stay on in the nursing home following her rehab. She just put her hand on my arm and said "It's time," and told me that she would do the same if it were her mother.
We knew that it would take something like this get my mother out of her home and into a care home situation because she would never go willingly on her own. I lived in fear that she would burn the house down with the ancient floor space heater she insisted on using in her living room, among other worries.
What I'm trying to say here (not very well) is that even though your father may not want to be in the nursing facility permanently, he needs to be there–and you can't change his condition or should you feel guilty that you can't attend to his every need. You have gone above and beyond the call of duty in caring for your father this far. Everyone who reads your blog would agree with me on that. I think it's time. Best of luck to you—keep posting. We're all in this together.
Thanks so much – what a roller-coaster you've been through, too. In my work life, I write a fair amount about home automation, and along with praying that cars will drive themselves by the time I'm 89, I'm also hoping a lot of the home medical electronics now being developed are in place by that time, too. It's just such a tough space for both parent and adult child to be in.
Yes, the parent/child dynamic is turned on its head at this stage of the game for sure. Right now I've gotten the wheels in motion for my mother to be transferred to the assisted living facility next door to where she is now. She's ambulatory, with the help of her walker, and no longer needs the skilled nursing care of the RNs, but the main push right now is that she has a roommate, where she hadn't had one before.
it wasn't a good year but it was the best we could do. I am not emotionally able to be a physical care giver and your own feelings match mine exactly. I did the best I could. its time..and as hard as that is….you deserve a life too. its his time to face the eventual endings in his life. its yours to support him the best you can and move on. i am so sorry for all your losses…his and yours.
I'm with TTPT and others … your father NEEDS the level of care that can only be had in a skilled nursing facility, or a huge bank account to afford in-home care. And even if he had the $$$$, it still would remain a tremendous distraction from your own life (and means of income). He requires a nursing home. It's time.
My own mother remains in assisted living, but I honestly believe they are going 'above and beyond'. She doesn't have a colostomy, but her need for personal care (change of briefs and cleanup) is quite frequent in the day – and she is also highly tolerant of soiling (poop on her hands doesn't really bother her). She has been diabetic for many years but at this point can only self-inject insulin if the staff guides her to how to use the pen-type insulin shot.
Have you considered talking to a hospice service? Though many associate hospice with 'giving up' on life, studies show people actually live LONGER on hospice than those without. My mother's hospice services have been wonderfully helpful in weighing options. They employ social workers, chaplains, as well as doctors and nurses and volunteers. Wherever he goes next, if he qualifies for hospice, it can be a boon to both of you, even if only in decision-making. My mother has been using hospice services (paid for by Medicare) for a couple years or so, due to her surviving and renewing her qualifications periodically. I'm very grateful for it. (They also pay for a host of additional expenses – including some medicines, briefs, durable equipment, a hospital bed, bedside commode, wheelchair and more).
You have already gifted your father with a couple of years of your constant support and your life. This has been such a treasure for him, and for you in a way, and you can be proud to have already done so much. But to continue to do so would be unfair to you both – it's time to pass the baton to those with the skills and resources to support him as he now needs it. It's time.
And if I could be permitted one more comment… from my reading of your blog, your father is a really social person. He likes being around people, doesn't he? And from my weekly suppers with my mother at her home, I've seen the men (who are much fewer) are slathered with attention from attentive women. "Frank, do you need more crackers?" "Frank, did you get enough soup? Is it too hot?" Then there are the guy-times when these old guys hang out together and joke about their "man-stuff" … women, sports, money …. never too old for that!
And when I come visit, mom and I have a weekly glass of wine (if white zinfandel counts), our own little 'happy hour' with a tin of cashews.
This could really work for him in some nice ways, to give him a boost of social interactions in an environment of peers (more or less), with a (mostly) relaxed visit from his son. That can work out way better than having a stressed, oft-resentful and nagging adult child as caretaker, with little respite for either of you.
I hope it works for you both. I'm eager to hear what happens next!
My heart goes out to you. Tears come to my eyes looking at the photo of you two on your header. No matter what the circumstances, it's so hard to feel that we have ever given enough and yet there's the point where we need to give to ourself at the expence of the other person. My mom has Alzheimers which is progressing rapidly right now. I look at myself in the mirror and see how much I've aged in the last year and feel that I can't do this much longer. You've have given your dad so much in these 4 years. He's very lucky. Be easy on yourself.
One further comment… I appreciate what Nancy Newman added, that your dad has a chance now to realize that he is now in the final phase of his life, and to decide how he wants to spend it. Who does he need to say goodbye to? What reflection does he want to do?
It may sound a bit new-agey and, based on what I've read since you've been writing your blog, I suspect that's not exactly his style. But he may need a boost to see over the trees, to see the forest for what it is. Or, to just grieve the loss of his younger self.
I know, it sounds goofy, and will be rougher in real life than it is as I wrote above. But I believe with all my heart that, if it were me, I would want to have someone to shake me a bit, to help me awaken to where I am in life, to not pretend that I'm just a slower version of my old self. It's a passage to a final era, a significant era.
And, to help him know that you will also be 'with him', nearby, ready to offer a hand or an ear, or just a good Scotch and a smile. He won't be alone.
I am so sorry and I send you a cyber hug with thoughts and prayers.
My mother passed on while in a rehab facility. We do what we can do and then we have to let go. It's okay.
>I just can't bring the elderly father sitting beside me back home again.
I just went through nearly the exact same scenario–bag explosions and all–with my husband. When I had to confront the committee, this time I had my little speech all written out, focussing on the points you make in the last three paragraphs. He starts out well, follows the regimen for a week, it all falls apart and the most telling point of all: When it falls apart, he is at great risk, because you are not a medical professional. It took some convincing, and I know I hurt my husband's feelings, but it had to be said.
My heart goes out to you. This is the worst time of all–the transition–and it is hard on you, I know. I wish I could help, anybody could help, but nothing is going to make it better. All you can do is get him the best care possible and monitor the caregivers. Your life is valuable, too.
Okay – I have to say, if he has the money to afford skilled nursing – he has the money to afford a home health aide.
Now. That's not to say that having another person in your home is going to be easy, or pleasant. But it should be acknowledged that that is in fact a possible alternative. It may not be the *right* alternative, but that's a different issue.
LTC insurance (if that's what's paying for his proposed stay move to nursing home?) will often cover home care instead (its cheaper).
Medicaid will cover home care services (there is in fact a push to get people OUT of nursing homes, if they have somewhere to go).
And – nothing you've described is particularly "skilled" care, with the exception of testing for blood glucose, and administering insulin if necessary.
Everything else is hygeine/safety – and something that a home health aide can easily perform.
In fact, they could most likely do the glucose TESTING, and then only interrupt you if insulin needed to be administered.
Also – as I have an illeostomy bag (have since age 15, I'm 30's now) .. I can appreciate that problems can occur. Its important to find a bag system that *fits* well. Including all the various items that can be used to ensure a tighter fit.
Also important to change regularly, otherwise the seal will start to break. I change 2x/week.
An aide can easily help with emptying the bag, same as emptying a urinal, or changing adult briefs.
I'm not saying there aren't challenges, I'm not saying you're not burned out and deserving of a break. But – for a person who wants to be home, and could be home with nursing assistance – I'm sorry a nursing home is often a death sentence.
And I say this with full knowledge that one day my parents care (both are bed bound, they have an aide who assists) will go beyond hygeine/safety to true medical – and it will be beyond me – and at that point – I will put them in a home.
Good luck to you – you've done a great job by your dad. Look into what services in your community (aide companies, visiting nurses, etc..) you can use – if only so that you have a full knowledge from which to make your decision.
Actually, he has enough money to pay for skilled nursing for two months. Then Medicaid kicks in. Medicaid will not pay for round-the-clock home nursing care, which is what is needed if I'm to both have my father at home and continue to be able to work out of my home office. Would I leave my father unattended 8-10 hours/day if I worked in a commercial office? No way, in this situation. Where I live, home health care of the sort willing to do the tasks you describe, starts at $20/hour – if you're lucky enough to find someone willing to take that wage. For a half day, that's $240/day – or $60/day less than the nursing home. However, in the nursing home he'll be getting real medical care. And I'll be able to sleep through the entire night without having to keep half an ear open listening for his call.
My work already has suffered because of this situation. I own a small (1,100 sq. ft.), 2-story home. I'm a writer with major commercial clients, facing multiple deadlines a month, all of which are critical for me to meet in order to pay the mortgage. The level of daily distraction and interruption already was approaching my limit before this crisis.
It's great you've been able to live so successfully with your illeostomy. However – not knowing your personal experiences – I only can assume that learning how to handle that kind of medical device at 15, with your entire life in front of you, is entirely different game than learning it at 90, looking at a downhill slope.
Your a good child to manage care for two bed-bound parents. The comment regarding death sentences, though, is hurtful. It is not a death sentence. In fact, I've gotten several responses to this post letting me know of loved ones that actually have thrived in nursing situations. I don't know what my father's outcome will be. But I do know that the facility I'm considering will support him having as active a life as he's capable of having. I can still drive him to the senior center for his poker games and men's group, I can still take him out to lunch or bring him over here for dinner – the facility is 10 minutes away. He'll just sleep somewhere else.
We all have our own stories and solutions in this situation. I appreciate that you've done very well in yours. I have thought this scenario through more times than you can imagine over the last 6 weeks. This is what will work for me and my family.
I agree with you about the harshness of calling the nursing home a "death sentence." The only death sentence your father has been given comes in the form of his being a 90 year old man with diabetes, kidney and peripheral artery disease, heart issues and now a colostomy. How much more, in a.e.b.'s opinion, is required of you before you're allowed to ask for help?
Absolutely disagree that a nursing home is often a death sentence.
For Chuck's dad, and for Chuck too, a nursing home might be the best place for dad to face his inevitable ending. Every one of us is going to do the same thing- where you do it is not nearly as important as how you do it.
I don't really have anything to add, except that you can't really take care of your Dad if you can't take care of yourself. It's sounds like it would just be too much for you to handle at home. He needs to be somewhere where his needs will be met and he can be properly cared for, and you can't do that and work and take care of yourself, also. My thoughts are with you.
I've been where you are, it's horrible. But nothing you can do will change things, the end story will be the same. Your father needs you to be strong enough to give him the care he truly needs, at the nursing home. Please try to do that for him. Children don't always understand or like the life decisions we make for them, and the elderly are often in the same boat. But it has fallen to you, don't let him down.
Without denying that there are some bad nursing homes, and there are some people who go downhill rapidly after entering a nursing home, it also seems to be an open secret that some people thrive in nursing homes (at least, in comparison to how things would go for them if they were still at home, or in an adult child's home).
When my father went to a nursing home, I found it to be a paradox: he was in the worst shape of his life, physically (mostly paralyzed), and ought to have been utterly miserable, yet in reality, he was pretty happy to have so much attention. He pretty much had constant company and social stimulation, whereas at home he had become rather hermit-like.
Hi Karen, thanks, we did try that, but then we had to move her.
Just for the record, though, the nursing home was very receptive to that. They've apparently had other spouses sort of become members of the community and continue coming in after their spouse dies. She wasn't exactly volunteering, really just visiting, because she had made friends there. There are still some folks she writes to, and one old guy whom nobody visits that she sends chocolate to.
For all the bad rap nursing homes get, there are lots of little stories like that. The nursing home my father was in was far from posh (Medicaid), but they were really good to him. There were a couple of people who were snotty and cold – nurses, frankly – but also a lot of people who really had hearts of gold and knocked themselves out to try to help my father or at least make his life a little pleasanter. The social worker was a gem, the physical therapists were wonderful, many of the aides were wonderful. One of my father's best buddies was the cleaning lady. She had no obligation to him in any way other than mopping the floor, and I'm sure her pay is pathetic, but she made it a point to chat and joke with my father every day.
Of course they had no obligation to my mother at all, but they cared about her too. More than once the social worker or the nursing director would call me to ask if my mother was ok, if they hadn't seen her for a couple of days or thought she wasn't looking good.
Sorry probably too much information, but if Chuck is facing this, perhaps helpful. Nursing homes are a really mixed thing, it could be awful, or it could be heaven sent, most likely something in between.
I think your posts and your information are helpful to all- I know I appreciate hearing what you have to say.
Personally, I think nursing homes do much more good for many people than most of society realizes. Friendships can be formed at any age and there's much to be said for being with your peers, and others, no matter what stage of life you are in.
Yes … I don't want to paint too rosy a picture, 'cus I definitely know there were long periods of loneliness for my dad, or misery on waking at night alone, with his wife of 50 years just a few blocks away, but that's not the same as being there. But I also know he met people, made friends, and actually had experiences he wouldn't have had at home – like the music therapy, for instance. There should be WAY WAY more of that in nursing homes. I remember when a harpist came to play for the residents, the look of delight and joy on my father's face. It's just too bad there couldn't be more of it … we sure have our priorities mixed up in this society!
The music and the animals – there were several people who regularly brought in their dogs, and that always brought smiles even from people who usually seemed miserable. My father loved the dogs.
I work at a nursing home and with patients with the kinds of issues your father is having. And my father has ALZ and is in a facility himself.
Dear friend, it is time to put him in a facility. I encourage you to spend your time finding a great facility, read the medicare grades, ask for referrals, talk to the residents, take your dad for a meal or activity there. I have patients who children visit daily or weekly, or call daily.
Caring for our parents can look different, he will make friends and the facility, it will be new at first but stick with it. I SO encourage you, YOU count, YOU matter, you need your space.
It will get better, YOU are right about his care, it is getting too complicated for you and for him. He needs professional support, people who work with this all the time. He will be better cared for medically at one of these facility, they will watch him closely.
I cared for my frail, 93 year old mother at home. Eventually, she became bed-bound and the level of care that I needed to provide even with home health aides and hospice help really increased.
Our hospice nurse said to me, "She can go into the hospice house and you can be her daughter again." I did not understand, at first, what she meant. I thought all that care giving meant I was being the daughter.
Now I get it and I offer to you,if your Dad is in the nursing home, you will be able to be the son, his child who loves him and is there for him at the end of his life–not his home health aide. So the time has come and it's okay. Being the son is a good thing! Think of it–a chance to have some interactions with your Dad that aren't centered around you nagging him about meds, hygiene, or diet. That's a better vision for your last days together.
Thank you for your blog; I have enjoyed the vicarious companionship of another adult child just trying to do their best navigating the health system and the medical and social needs of an elderly parent. I also second the advice to consult with hospice–they can be as helpful to you as they can be to your dad.
You're doing a beautiful thing, taking care of him at home, and you'll continue taking care of him, in a different way, once he goes to the nursing home. You and he both are lucky to have each other and have this time together, to care for and be cared for. I wish you both a smooth transition.
Katie is right: You will still be a caregiver, for better or for worse, with your father in a nearby nursing facility. You'll still be his visitor, advocate, monitor, transportation provider and link to his past. To place someone in a nursing home is not to abandon him. But you will have the ability to schedule much of what you do, and that will allow you to continue your work, get a night's sleep and maintain some sanity. It's not what you wanted or planned for, but if you find a quality facility and you continue to oversee his care, you will be doing what you need to, for him and for you. Godspeed.
Argh. I am so sorry it has come to this. It's especially hard for you because you are alone, and you're working. My husband and I are moving his 97 year old mother to assisted living this Thursday. Removing her from the house that has been home for 50 years is difficult, but it's time. From what you've written, it doesn't seem doable for your Dad to be at home, and for you to maintain the business that makes the home possible. Cut yourself some slack, and remind yourself you can only do so much. After awhile, you need help. I think of you as we go through this process, and all of the others who are doing it as well.
You're facing probably the most difficult decision you'll make. My sister and I made the same decision a year ago this Friday. Now we know we made the right choice, but at the time we were as exausted and torn apart emotionally as you are now.
Looking back over the past year, there have been unavoidable declines, but on the whole Mom has had a lot more FUN than she would have if we'd been able to keep her at home. She enjoys live music, crafts, stories, visiting with therapy animals, and even wheelchair squaredancing. Her default expression is a smile that lights up my day (v.s. the scowl she had living at home).
The stress doesn't go away after admission, but it's more manageable. We've become "helicopter" daughters. We're constantly checking and following up on Mom's care. The difference is that the time we spend with her (40+ hours a week between the two of us) is now quality time.
Life may not be terrific for our tiny family, but for today it's the best it can possibly be and we have no regrets. Whatever the outcome, I hope you feel the same way this time next year.
Please be as kind and caring with yourself as you have been with your father. I know from personal experience that it is much harder to give yourself permission to take care of your needs when it feels like you are failing your parent if you do so. All the commenters before me have said what I believe so beautifully that I can only add this…allow yourself to see the wonderful care you have provided your Dad thus far, and know that the decisions you make in order to provide for his changing needs are still guided by love.
By now the decision likely has been made. As some earlier writers said, you are still his caregiver when he is in the nursing home – but you are not the first responder to every single need! Many elders do better than we expect when arriving at a nursing home, as other writers have clearly described. (Sometimes they don't want their kids to know, so you get the frown and the complaints – check with direct care staff for what he really is like when you are not there.)You get to be a care manager AND a son, and you begin to get some of your life back. You have given up so much already to care for your dad, please don't feel you should have done more. (even if he tries to lay a guilt trip on you!) If he is saying he wants to go home, that's ok – you'd want that too if you could arrange it, but it is not possible. He needs access to a nurse (RN or LPN, not just a HHA willing to overstep the legal boundaries) who can assess changes in his condition and intervene as needed. The best way to ensure that he has good care is to visit often, on a somewhat unpredictable schedule, and get to know some of the staff on his floor. Having hospice involved can be helpful, esp. if he wants to talk with SW, chaplain, or trained hospice volunteers about end of life/dying/spiritual issues. Sometimes hospice RN can recommend comfort measures that the nursing home staff might not think of, or may need a push to adopt. Let us know how you are doing, and take good care of YOU.
Hi Ive been reading your blog for the past few months. Going through a very similar situation with my grandmother who I am the primary caretaker for. I too am single but was not residing with her. My soon to be 90 yr old gram just had the same surgery as your Dad in Boston and was hospitalized for three week. She is currently in a sub-acute hospital and will most likely be returning to the nursing home rehab. She was only in the nursing home for a few weeks prior to this last hospitalization. And I havent had the "offical talk" with her yet. Its been a long year of hospitalizations, ED visits, Dr appts etc. That I am sure you understand.
Thank you for posting your blog and sharing.
Good luck to you and your Gram, Mel. Very parallel situations – my father turns 90 next month. You never know, she may come to the conclusion herself that she needs more help than home health can provide. My father is still in rehab, but I think they'll be discharging him either next week or the week after. I think he's beginning to see that my house may not be a possible option once that happens.
You need to do what is best for both of you and recognize the limitations of the situation. The key is to make sure that he continues to receive quality care. You can remain an active participant in your dad's care without sacrificing quality. I am very familiar with the facilities where you live and pretty much without exception, he will get the care and be safe. Good luck to you and thank you for your posts.


text:
package com.focusit.jsflight.recorder.internalevent;

import java.io.File;
import java.text.SimpleDateFormat;
import java.util.Date;

import org.slf4j.Logger;
import org.slf4j.LoggerFactory;

/**
 * Created by dkolmogortsev on 03.03.17.
 * Builder for {@link InternalEventRecorder}
 */
public class InternalEventRecorderBuilder
{
    private static final Logger LOG = LoggerFactory.getLogger(InternalEventRecorderBuilder.class);

    private final String outputPath;
    //Configuration defaults
    private int maxElementsBeforeFlush = -1;
    private int maxQueueSize = 4096;
    private boolean storeInGzip = false;
    private String threadName = "internal-event-storage";
    private FileStrategy strategy;

    private InternalEventRecorderBuilder(String outputPath)
    {
        this.outputPath = outputPath;
        this.strategy = new SimpleIncrementFileStrategy(outputPath);
    }

    public static InternalEventRecorderBuilder builderFor(String outputPath)
    {
        return new InternalEventRecorderBuilder(outputPath);
    }

    public InternalEventRecorderBuilder storageThreadName(String threadName)
    {
        this.threadName = threadName;
        return this;
    }

    public InternalEventRecorderBuilder maxQueueSize(int maxQueueSize)
    {
        this.maxQueueSize = maxQueueSize;
        return this;
    }

    public InternalEventRecorderBuilder storeInGzip()
    {
        this.storeInGzip = true;
        return this;
    }

    public InternalEventRecorderBuilder maxElementsBeforeFlush(int maxElementsBeforeFlush)
    {
        this.maxElementsBeforeFlush = maxElementsBeforeFlush;
        return this;
    }

    public InternalEventRecorderBuilder rolloverStrategy(long rolloverInterval)
    {
        this.strategy = new RollOverFileStrategy(outputPath, rolloverInterval);
        return this;
    }

    public InternalEventRecorder build()
    {
        return new InternalEventRecorder(maxElementsBeforeFlush, maxQueueSize, threadName, storeInGzip, strategy);
    }

    /**
     * Created by dkolmogortsev on 06.03.17.
     * Strategy for acquiring new output file
     */
    interface FileStrategy
    {
        File getNewFile();

        String getOutputPath();

        default boolean isRecordToNewFile(InternalEventRecorder.InternalEventRecord record)
        {
            return false;
        }
    }

    /**
     * Created by dkolmogortsev on 06.03.17.
     * Simple strategy that adds counter value to file name
     * On each request for new file counter is incremented;
     */
    private class SimpleIncrementFileStrategy implements FileStrategy
    {
        private final String basePath;
        private int counter = 0;

        private SimpleIncrementFileStrategy(String path)
        {
            basePath = path;
        }

        @Override
        public File getNewFile()
        {
            return new File(basePath + counter++);
        }

        @Override
        public String getOutputPath()
        {
            return basePath;
        }
    }

    /**
     * Created by dkolmogortsev on 06.03.17.
     * File strategy that rolls over previous file(prev. file is deleted)
     * on each request for new file current date in format "yyyy-MM-dd_HH-mm-ss" is added to base file
     */
    private class RollOverFileStrategy implements FileStrategy
    {
        private final SimpleDateFormat FORMAT = new SimpleDateFormat("yyyy-MM-dd_HH-mm-ss");

        private final long rolloverInterval;
        private final String outputPath;
        private long rolloverDate;
        private File previous;

        private RollOverFileStrategy(String outputPath, long rolloverInterval)
        {
            this.rolloverInterval = rolloverInterval;
            this.outputPath = outputPath;
            updateRolloverDate();
        }

        @Override
        public File getNewFile()
        {
            updateRolloverDate();
            if (previous != null)
            {
                previous.delete();
            }
            File file = previous = new File(outputPath + "_" + FORMAT.format(new Date()));
            return file;
        }

        @Override
        public String getOutputPath()
        {
            return outputPath;
        }

        @Override
        public boolean isRecordToNewFile(InternalEventRecorder.InternalEventRecord record)
        {
            return record.timestampEpoch > rolloverDate;
        }

        private void updateRolloverDate()
        {
            this.rolloverDate = System.currentTimeMillis() + rolloverInterval;
        }
    }

}

redpajama_set_name: RedPajamaGithub