Which is the smallest bridge in the world?—The bridge of your nose.
What four letters would frighten a thief?—O I C U.
What is that which goes from London to York without moving?—The road.
Which is easier to spell—fiddle-de-dee or fiddle-de-dum?—Fiddle-dedee, because it is spelt with more "e's."
When may a chair be said to dislike you?—When it can't bear you.
What animal took most luggage into the Ark, and which two took the least?—The elephant, who took his trunk, while the fox and the cock had only a brush and a comb between them.
Which of the English kings has most reason to complain of his washerwoman?—King John, when he lost his baggage in the Wash.
If a bear were to go into a linen-draper's shop, what would he want?— He would want muzzlin'.
Why is B like a hot fire?—Because it makes oil Boil.
If an egg were found on a music-stool, what poem would it remind you of?—"The Lay of the Last Minstrel."
Why is a schoolmaster like a shoe-black?—Because he polishes the understanding of the people.