6 Fun Facts About Kissing
Ah, the joy of a kiss.
Many a song has been sung about it, and many a poem transcribed. But what, really, is behind a great kiss?
Let’s explore this pleasurable act a bit more and discover just why it’s an essential part of our sexual health and wellness.
Kissing has been around since ancient times
We’ve waxed poetic about kissing since ancient times, starting with the Sumerians and Egyptians around 3,500 years ago.
Ancient Sumerian poetry refers both to lip-kissing and “tonguemaking,” and Egyptian poetry, etched into papyri, mention the feeling of the kiss as coming alive by waking up from this everlasting sleep and feeling intoxicating sense of arousal: And when her lips are pressed to mine, I am made drunk and need not wine.
Humans in biblical times also compare the act of kissing to intoxication. In Song of Solomon, one verse states: Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth! For your love is better than wine.
So why the references to wine and drunken revelry? Well, it turns out that...
Kissing is pure pleasure
Every time we kiss, the brain releases oxytocin -- that feel-good hormone that influences basic functions such as falling in love, orgasm, childbirth and breastfeeding. It’s also associated with affection, tenderness, and touching. During a kiss, the brain releases additional happy hormones like serotonin and dopamine, which cause similar sensations in our bodies as drug and alcohol use.
These feelings of pleasure are so universal that the desire to kiss even has a scientific name: filemamanía.
Kissing has many benefits
In addition to making us feel good and increase our arousal, kissing has many other benefits:
It improves well-being and decreases stress levels
Remember those hormones we mentioned? Turns out they not only make us horny, they also make us feel less stressed. Kissing has been shown to reduce cortisol levels -- aka that icky hormone linked to all kinds of health problems like high blood pressure, increased body fat, and heart disease.
Kissing encourages togetherness
In addition to making us feel high, the hormone oxytocin also improves our sense of connection and helps us bond with our partner.
It can improve our relationships
In a six-week study on the effects of kissing within relationships, researchers found not only that kissing reduced stress levels, but it also improved couples’ “relationship satisfaction” levels.
Kissing helps us determine partner compatibility
A kissing study by the University of Albany in New York published in Evolutionary Psychology shows that for both women and men, the first kiss is key to continuing the relationship -- an essential filter. "There could be mechanisms in the subconscious that detect some genetic incompatibility," say the researchers. These mechanisms are determined through our sense of smell, touch, and even body position of our partner.
Almost everyone closes their eyes when kissing
But few know why they do so.
It may be so we can focus on the sense of touch and not be distracted by additional stimuli. Our brains are better at interpreting sensations separately, to avoid having to process several messages at the same time. Plus, keeping your eyes open just feels weird and creepy.
Another kissing commonality: two-thirds of us turn our heads to the right side when we lean in for the smooch.
Kissing is a lost art
In the world of sexuality, we talk about orgasms and sexual positions all the time, but we’ve forgotten the art of the kiss.
And it truly is an art form. You must master gentle techniques and ease into it in just the right way. Plus, there are so many different types of kisses: soft, slow and gentle; smooth and suave; passionate and frenzied. Often, one turns into the other.
Don’t worry if you’re still a kissing novice. Here are some tips to help you become a master of the craft:
- Ease into it slowly. Don’t just grab the other person and go to town –– this can be intimidating and off-putting. Start by holding the person gently and getting a feel for their body language and rhythms.
- Place your hands in a comfortable position on your partner’s body –– around their neck, hips, or biceps. And don’t keep them static –– give a squeeze or caress here and there.
- Move gently towards the mouth. Start by exploring the mouth with gentle, slow kisses.
- Gently part your mouth and start exploring theirs with your tongue. Start slowly and go with the flow. Once you feel the excitement build, you can progress to faster movements and even sucking and biting.
- Continue building kissing momentum to gradually increase your arousal. Be sure to affirm your partner’s kissing abilities with gentle moans or by squeezing them with your hands.