Because girls with ADHD often exhibit different symptoms from those of boys with the disorder, you'll need different strategies for helping them cope. For example, it's not as common for girls with ADHD to have behavior problems because they're not as likely to be physically hyperactive, says Patricia Quinn, a pediatrician on the board of the National Attention Deficit Disorder Association (ADDA) and co-author of Understanding Girls With ADHD. "Girls tend to have more problems with organization, socializing, and time management," she says. Here are some tips for addressing the special needs of a girl with ADHD.
Set up consistent routines
If you find yourself constantly asking your daughter to hurry up, understand that she's not defying you on purpose. Many girls with ADHD have a tough time staying focused on the task at hand, whether it's getting dressed by a certain time each morning or completing a homework assignment. You can help your daughter stay on track by establishing a consistent schedule for household routines. For example, eat breakfast at the same time each morning and follow the same bedtime routine each night. Doing so will help give your daughter consistent expectations. To further head off power struggles during these transition times, let your child be a part of establishing the routines. For example, ask her: "Should we eat dinner at 6 or 6:30? Would you like to take a bath and then brush your teeth, or do it the other way around?"
Help your child monitor her own behavior
"Girls with ADHD do really well with self-monitoring, but for this to work you have to help them become aware of their situation," says Quinn. For example, if your daughter can't seem to get out the door on time in the morning, explain to her, without criticizing, that you're going to help her learn to be on time. Set a timer in the morning to go off every five minutes. Explain that each time the timer buzzes, that's her signal to "check in" with herself to make sure she's doing what she needs to do: getting dressed, brushing her teeth, eating her breakfast.
Help her stay organized at home and school
If your daughter can't seem to comply with requests from adults, it may be because she can't stay organized enough to follow through on a task. If this is the case, you'll have to be very involved in helping her work out a system to stay on top of school assignments and household chores. Many parents find it helpful to color-code folders and binders to correspond with different school subjects. It's also ideal if you can have two sets of books for each subject — one for home and one for school — so she's in no danger of forgetting to bring home a book for an assignment. For long-term assignments and weekly chores, create a large wall calendar. Finally, work with your child's teacher to help create structure in the classroom.