The statistics on bullying are alarming: the National Education Association says 6 out of 10 American teenagers witness bullying in school at least once a day and seventy percent of teenagers believe bullying is a problem in their school. It’s happening and we’re not doing enough to stop it. As Bullying Prevention Month wraps up, I want to challenge all of us to do more: make time to teach about how to treat others and model empathy and compassion with one another.
We are lucky in Monroe to have committed educators in our schools making an impact on our students each day. I am constantly impressed with my colleagues’ hard work and persistence to help each and every child excel as the culture of public schools becomes increasingly focused on test scores and Monroe competes to keep up.
However, I struggle with what is being lost as the pressure to get students to pass test increases.
“The schools’ emphasis on student standardized testing has been driving out activities that don’t help boost test scores, and the school climate has deteriorated as a result,” concludes Laurel Sturt, former public school teacher and author of “Davonte’s Inferno.”
In our ongoing requirements to meet standards and help students pass tests, the importance of educating individuals to be human beings must not fall by the wayside. I will continue to argue that the best schools and the best teachers focus on teaching humans, not curriculum. They are teaching students how to excel academically, while simultaneously creating kind and compassionate human beings. I stand with my colleagues and each community member dedicated to developing our children into smart and successful humans that treat each other with compassion.
In my school this month, we worked to implement time for an anti-bullying assembly. A well-intentioned colleague shared reluctance to find time to schedule this assembly because of our low test scores, not wanting to cancel instruction for 40 minutes. I want to continue to argue that this IS instruction, and one assembly isn’t enough. We must be intentional every day in how we teach individuals to interact. Additionally, this goes beyond the classroom to hallway interactions, Facebook discussion boards, and adult-to-adult conversation, as the young child and teenager are watching and listening nearby.
“The most important element in preventing bullying is a shift in the overall climate of a school community” says Ron Astor in “School Violence in Context: Culture, Neighborhood, Family, School, and Gender.” Ongoing and regular conversation about how to deal with conflicts and handle relationships with others is found to be the most effective way of combatting bullying. The general culture of compassion in schools speaks strongly to the success of anti-bullying. Taking the time to develop school community, classroom relationships, and appropriate recess play is critical. Continuing to place emphasis on educating the whole person and not focusing solely on academic achievement is essential.
Here are some ways we, as parent and teacher educators, can help stop bullying:
1) Promote empathetic concern for others through your behaviors. Model how to deal with people that bother you in an appropriate and compassionate way.
2) Take it seriously. Some of the things children and teenagers share seem silly to us. It isn’t silly to them. Listen to what they are saying and what they aren’t saying. Intervene and take action to help bullying stop and strengthen kids to help them deal with it.
3) Know what your child is doing online. Many parents make agreements that teenagers only have access to smartphones and Facebook pages if they share their passwords and parents have access to everything they’re doing.
4) Teach our children to be “up-standers” rather than just bystanders. Talk about how to support victims and how to seek help from adults when someone is being bullied.
5) Parents, make sure you’re advocating for your child and contact the teacher and principal if and when you have concerns.Recognize we are a team and our goals are the same. We can and should work together to fix the problem. Teachers, don’t ignore it and stand up to stop it. Monroe Public Schools has a tip line on its website (www.monroe.wednet.edu) to report bullying via phone, text, email, or web. Anyone can and should report bullying to get it to stop, and continue to report until it stops.
As Bullying Prevention Month ends, our work continues every day to make significant and measurable decreases in bullying behavior. Although not measured on a standardized test, I hope we all will make time to help develop compassionate human beings.
Jessica Conte is a Nationally Board Certified teacher, has nine years of teaching experience in Monroe, and is a doctoral student in Educational Leadership at Seattle University.