We read two questions and answers from The Larger Catechism (a Presbyterian church document) every morning. It struck me that these speak clearly about the duties and sins of friendships. See what you think.
Q. 131. What are the duties of equals?
A. The duties of equals are:
to regard the dignity and worth of each other,
in giving honor to go one before another,
and to rejoice in each other’s gifts and advancement as their own.
Q. 132. What are the sins of equals?
A. The sins of equals are, besides the neglect of the duties required,
the undervaluing of worth,
envying the gifts,
grieving at the advancement or prosperity one of another,
and usurping pre-eminence one over another.
I need constant reminders to remove the sweater of selfishness when I am with friends. I need to learn these phrases until they become instinctive.
“You go first.”
“Tell me more.”
“What do you think?”
“I admire that about you.”