Many people often question if pair-bonding (or serial monogamy) is truly a part of human nature. Committing to one sexual partner for the foreseeable future seems not only daunting, it seems to fly in the face of our evolutionary history. After all, aren’t we biologically programmed to spread our seed as far and wide as possible?
A new study suggests otherwise. Researcher Sergey Gavrilets of the University of Tennessee worked with chimpanzees to try and find the source of monogamy in our evolutionary history. (Not only is much of our DNA genetically similar, but it is also believed that humans and chimpanzees had several mating and child-rearing patterns in common.)
In typical chimpanzee-bonding scenarios, stronger males are the most likely to have mating opportunities and further their blood line. They mate with the healthy, younger females while the weaker males are elbowed out of such opportunities. However, Gavrilets found something shocking: many of these weaker males were able to secure mating opportunities by doing “favors” for their potential mates, such as by bringing them food. The wisdom of the weaker males went even further. They didn’t give food to every possible mate, but only those with the highest likelihood of fidelity (in order to ensure that the future offspring would be his).
The University of Tennessee study is fascinating for many reasons. Not only does it help us to better understand the roots of pair-bonding (which has long confused many biologists and researchers), but it also helps us to understand the give-and-take that lies behind the complicated bonds of sexuality and family life. The weaker chimps realized that they had to find a way to further their own blood line, but they knew they couldn’t do so via brawn alone, so instead they used their brains to seduce their mates. Yet they also realized they had to pick a mate who would be faithful in order to ensure that they wouldn’t be cuckolded into raising another chimp’s baby.
If any of this sounds familiar, it’s because much of chimpanzee behavior resembles that of early humans .(And even modern humans!) For example, while today’s men generally don’t physically fight one another in order to win mates, they do display their assets when women are around, whether those assets are bulging muscles or a bulging pocketbook. Meanwhile, when selecting for a partner to bond with, men are subconsciously (or consciously) looking for a mate whom they feel they can trust, and women are similarly looking for a mate who will be trustworthy and reliable, as well.
As this study illustrates, pair-bonding is more than just a cultural or religious more. Monogamy is often an asset in the animal kingdom because it ensures that the vulnerable offspring will have two engaged and committed individuals overseeing their best interests. Although our needs and gender roles in society have changed vastly over the years, one thing remains certain: A family unit is only as strong as the parental forces that maintain it, and the cornerstone of any happy home is the love and commitment within it.
Laura Berman, PhD is a leading sex and relationship educator and therapist, popular TV and radio host, New York Times best-selling author, and assistant clinical professor of ob-gyn and psychiatry at the Feinberg School of Medicine at Northwestern University in Chicago. She is the star of Couples in Crisis , on the Everyday Health Channel, every Thursday at 1pm EST.
Last Updated: 5/29/2012