About 30% of people in school today experience cyberbullying in some form. Almost 90% report having witnessed it take place. While most of these incidents do not escalate into physical issues, they can still be very difficult to deal with.
Victims of cyberbullying are twice as likely to experience thoughts of suicide.
It’s a hard time to be a child and a scary time to be a parent. While it can be hard to detect when your child is experiencing issues at school or online, there are some common signs and symptoms of cyberbullying.
In this article, we take a look at how you can identify those signs, and talk about what comes next.
Unease About Going to School
When your child expresses a firm desire to avoid school, it is often a sign that they are experiencing some form of bullying. There is, of course, a spectrum of avoidance behavior. It is normal for kids to complain about tests or homework. It is certainly normal for kids to want to sleep in or pursue hobbies and interests instead of going to class.
It is not normal for kids to routinely invent illnesses or other reasons they can’t go to class. Nor is it typical for kids to display clear signs of intense anxiety at the thought of going.
When avoidance behavior becomes extreme and routine, it is almost always a sign that something out of the ordinary is taking place. While the culprit may not be cyberbullying, or in-person bullying, these are possibilities to keep in mind. Especially when your child’s avoidance behavior displays some of the other qualities we will describe in this article.
Unusual Cyber Activity
Victims of cyberbullying often appear visibly shaken when they are using their devices. They may become anxious or moody while all on their phone or tablet. However, they will also opt to use these devices more often— sometimes even compulsively, as a way of seeing what has been said about them.
This sign, by itself, could also coordinate with cell phone or social media addiction— a legitimate psychological disorder that can cause anxiety and depression.
Either way, it’s a sign that warrants follow-up questions and a reasonable level of concern.
If your child displays a sudden unwillingness to discuss their personal life— particularly as it relates to online activity— this may be another indication that they are experiencing cyberbullying. This is, admittedly, a difficult consideration to identify when it comes to dealing with teenagers. When are they ever forthcoming about information, right?
If you notice that your child is beginning to withdraw, it’s important to actively seek communication. If they become particularly cagey about discussing their cyber life, or their personal connections, it may very well be an indication that they are experiencing some form of bullying.
A Sudden Decrease in Social Activity
Victims of bullying often choose not to engage in social activities. While the decision to stay home on the weekends needn’t be troubling in its own right, it can be considered cause for concern when it represents a significant departure from their usual activity.
If your child has always enjoyed spending time with their friends, but suddenly stops altogether, it will usually be for a reason— and one that requires your attention.
Changes in Sleeping or Eating Patterns
Any sudden change in your child’s sleeping or eating habits should be noted. That said, some normal changes may not be cause for significant concern. It is normal for kids to begin eating and sleeping more around the time they get to high school— both activities fuel the significant amount of growth they do during this time.
However, when the change seems very abrupt, and without context, it could be related to an emotional challenge that they are experiencing. When you notice a change in their eating and sleeping that coordinates with any of the other issues described in this list, it is worth further exploration.
References to Suicide or Depression
This is one of the most obvious causes for concern that you will encounter. If your child says that they are anxious, depressed, or experiencing thoughts of suicide, it’s something that will require your immediate attention.
It is easier to dismiss these statements than you might at first think. As a parent, you don’t want anything to be seriously wrong with your child. That desire for their health and wellness can make it easy to dismiss significant warning signs.
Don’t make that mistake. When suicide has been mentioned, it is important to take immediate action in the form of a psychological evaluation.
It really is. Almost all of the considerations listed above, with perhaps the exception of the final one, can be considered normal behaviors for a teenager. Except you’re probably reading this article because they didn’t feel very normal to you.
That feeling of unease is perhaps your most powerful tool in identifying when something is troubling your child. Don’t ignore it. If you think that they are going through a hard time don’t wait for the signs to become more significant. Act on it. Start having conversations with them.
If those conversations don’t get you anywhere, consider speaking with a school counselor for further advice and input.
Schools do have resources designed for addressing precisely this problem. Of course, you do want to make sure your actions don’t alienate your child or damage their trust in you. Make sure it all starts with a frank conversation.
Tell them why you are concerned. Tell them you would like to work together to discuss what is going on. Explain that if that doesn’t get anywhere, you will need to take additional steps, which might involve contacting their school.
It’s possible that the issue is not cyberbullying at all. It’s also possible that you will still need to contact their school, even if your child cooperates with what you are saying. No matter what, you can pretty much count on the experience being at least emotionally difficult for everyone involved.
One of the toughest truths for parents is that you can’t protect your children from everything. But by being proactive and determined, you can help prevent problems from escalating.
Guest Author Bio
With a Bachelor’s in Health Science along with an MBA, Sarah Daren has a wealth of knowledge within both the health and business sectors. Her expertise in scaling and identifying ways tech can improve the lives of others has led Sarah to be a consultant for a number of startup businesses, most prominently in the wellness industry, wearable technology and health education. She implements her health knowledge into every aspect of her life with a focus on making America a healthier and safer place for future generations to come.