One of the most important skills people can have is assertive communication. This is because an ability to assert oneself is what keeps us protected and allows us to be the ones shaping our reality. When we fail to have a voice in relationships or the workplace or in friendships, we can be easily dominated. This means others can get their way, become more important in our lives than us, or even dictate the terms of our lives than us, or even dictate the terms of our life or our relationships.
Secondly, if we constantly let others, pick for us, because we can’t speak up, then who’s reality we end up living in? Not ours! It can easily make our work or play life into a myriad of “shoulds” that quickly drain us.
Assertiveness skills are acquired naturally in a healthy child development, but there are certain childhood disrupts which can take them away from us. Things like a constantly critical or demanding parent, trauma, or an angry caregiver can make it maladaptive in childhood to be assertive so we stop it. Problem is, we don’t really tend to add it back into the repertoire in adulthood. That’s where shift’s “Speak up and Stand out” protocol comes to the rescue. It focuses on the origins of the removal of assertiveness, in the form of beliefs like “I am less than,” “I am not good enough” and “I am not good enough” and “I am not valued.” With these limiters out of the way, we organically grow our voice again, and strong assertiveness skills follow.