Isn’t it normal for brothers and sisters to fight as kids? My brothers and I did that a lot but we still had a solid sibling bond. My parents were always worried because of our fights and tried to convey to us that we should always love each other and look out for each other no matter what! As kids we never understood it.
But now that I am a parent, I get it. The world is cold and hard at times and we can only count on our siblings to protect and encourage us at all odds. One is fortunate if their kids love to spend time together and often show playful affection for one another. How do you encourage that type of connection? Well, that can be a challenge especially when kids are very different or have a larger age gap. However, this cause is worth pursuing. Friends do come and go, but family is to stay.
How we can teach our kids to love one another and develop deep sibling relationships.
- Setting closeness from birth.
When a baby is born he/she is much tougher than we know. We should encourage the elder brother or sister to give clumsy hugs and kisses to the younger ones rather than telling them to stand back. This helps to create a bond and a sense of belonging. We may even ask the elder sibling to assist in some basic baby care tasks.
- Building experiences together.
Help them to have good or bad experiences on family vacations, long drives, camping trips, or anything any one of you likes to do. Shared experiences help to create a connection between kids. Your kids will remember these special memories throughout their lives and will love to share them with their own families.
- Speak about your sibling relationships in the family get-togethers.
You need to share with your kids about the fun times you had with your siblings to convey the message that family bonding is for keeps and that family is special. It could be a simple story of how you and your sister used to sleep in the same room cuddling up together or how you used to make clay castles in the backyard of your house.
- Let your kids help in nurturing one another.
If one of your kids lacks in a subject that is strong for the other let them help each other to overcome their hurdles. Be it sports, studies, or any extracurricular activities. The success of the weak sibling gives, who the other has nurtured, becomes a shared sense of pride for them both.
- Reminder that friends will come and go, but family is forever.
We all know that ‘Best Friend Forever’ (BFF) changes with age and time. We only need to remind our kids of the fact that friends though are wonderful, but family relationships stay lifelong and should be nurtured too.
- Help your children develop shared passions and interests.
If you come upon a common interest between your kids help them to nurture it by taking them to the same classes or workshops. Also, encourage them to showcase their acquired skill together in a family get-together. Shared interests help to build a stronger sibling connection.
- To have compassion for their siblings.
It is the home where everyone is their true self. We as a family can easily identify each other’s weaknesses and strengths. As a parent one should guide their kids to be compassionate, not just to the people outside the house but also towards their siblings. We have to make them understand that they are responsible for the holistic development of each other and that they should show compassion and respect to the other in the areas of their weakness and if possible should help them overcome it rather than side with their peers and make fun of the other sibling.
We as parents should work along with our kids to nurture the relationship among them so they are there to take care of each other always.