Growing up our parents try hard to teach us how important it is to be self-assured and confident in different situations throughout our lives. As we grow up, our self-confidence can change greatly, depending on the people we surround ourselves with and the situations that we find ourselves in.
Unfortunately, it is easy for our confidence and self-assurance to be knocked as we go through different stages of our lives. It can also be difficult to know how to stop worrying about what others think of you, but there are a number of things that can be easily done to regain this assurance and confidence.
If you are looking to regain that assurance and confidence that you once had, here are a few simple steps on how to become more self-assured and confident:
Present Yourself with Confidence
One of the first steps in learning how to stop worrying about what others think of you and becoming more self-assured is to present yourself with confidence. Although this step is probably easier said than done, presenting yourself with confidence is one of the only ways that can actually build up your confidence and self-assurance. Essentially ‘fake it until you make it’. This means that you should act confident and strong in a situation, even if you are feeling anxious, down, or unconfident. So, before you enter a situation or event, even if it is just going to work or school, give yourself a little pep talk. Talking to yourself positively will help you to feel more self-assured and will allow yourself to feel a little bit more confident, even if you really do not feel it.
In doing this a number of times, you will being to feel more confident in different situations and you will start to truly believe in yourself. Once you have achieved this you will being to feel more self-assured and will worry less about what other people think about you. At the end of the day, it is more important to focus on what you think of yourself and not what other people think of you.
Look People in the Eye
Whether you believe it or not, looking people directly in the eye will actually help you in becoming more confident and self-assured. Giving direct eye contact and looking people in the eye when speaking is an action that many people struggle to do, no matter what their age or job position.
When you are speaking to a group of people or a even a person individually, looking at them in the eye not only shows them respect (it tells them you’re listening), but that you are someone they should be listening to as well.
People who are unconfident or have little self-assurance will find it difficult to look people directly in the eye when speaking to them and their eyes may begin to drift and wonder. This unfortunately shows a sign of weakness, so working on looking people in the eye directly when you are speaking to them is an important step in gaining confidence and boosting your self-assurance, as scary as it may seem.
Smile More Often
Although this may sound obvious, smiling more often can actually make you feel more confident and self-assured. According to extensive research that has been carried out over the years, it has been stated that when you smile you actually begin to feel happier and more confident, no matter how low you are initially feeling.
Your smile can really showcase your emotions, so it is important that you find things that make you smile. This could be spending time with friends, cooking delicious food, reading a book, playing a sport, listening to music and so much more. When you do what makes you smile, you will begin to feel happier and more confident in yourself.
This is probably one of the easiest steps that you can conveniently fit into your everyday life. Before you know it, this will become second nature to you, and you will find yourself smiling and feeling self-assured no matter what situation you are in.
As mentioned in the first step above, a great way to feel more confident and self-assured in different situations is to give yourself a pep talk every day, no matter if it is big or small. A pep talk involves telling yourself positive things or things that you like about yourself. This is a great form of self-appreciation and I believe it is something that everyone should do for themselves every day.
Practicing daily self-appreciation can be as easy as telling yourself or writing down 3 things that you like about yourself. A great way to fit the practice of self-appreciation into your busy everyday routine is to look at yourself in the mirror every morning before you leave for work or school and list out a number of things that you like about your appearance or personality. Doing this will give you a boost of confidence and will help you to feel self-assured throughout your day.
Play to Your Strengths
Playing to your strengths in order to feel more self-assured and confident is similar to practicing self-appreciation every day. Knowing what you are good at and where your strengths lie will help you to feel more confident about yourself. Instead of focusing on the things that you can’t do or that you struggle at doing, you should focus on the things that you excel at.
By focusing on doing whatever you are good at will actually lead you to performing tasks better. When we do well in certain tasks or activities, we automatically feel happy and confident in ourselves. Therefore, playing on our own strengths is something that we should do everyday in order to feel more self-assured.
Accept Your Imperfections
Although I have previously mentioned that you should focus on your strengths and the things that you like about yourself, another important step in becoming more self-assured and confident is to actually accept your imperfections. Nobody is perfect no matter what their height, weight, appearance, job, or lifestyle. Therefore, you should accept and understand that everyone has flaws and imperfections, no matter how confident they may seem.
Other people’s confidence and self-assurance can be intimidating at times, especially when you are feeling low and unconfident. But understanding that everyone else feels the same way about their flaws will actually help you in feeling more confident about yourself and your imperfections, whatever they may be. Accepting your own flaws will also allow you to focus on the qualities and features that you love about yourself. In doing this you will begin to feel more confident int yourself every day, boosting up your level of self-assurance and confidence.
Although it may be difficult and overwhelming at first, by adopting these simple steps into your everyday life, you will being to feel more confident and self-assured in no time. Having this new found level of confidence and self-assurance will present you with a new lease on life, leaving you wanting more for yourself and your life.
*Photos by Mathilde Langevin