Providing for your child's physical needs (food, shelter, clothing) is a fairly straightforward matter. Trying to provide for your child's emotional needs can be trickier. Although there are many parenting styles, most experts agree on some general guidelines for nurturing a child's emotional health and laying the ground work for an emotionally healthy adulthood.
- Be aware of stages in child development so you don't expect too much or too little from your child.
- Encourage your child to express his or her feelings; respect those feelings. Let your child know that everyone experiences pain, fear, anger, and anxiety. Try to learn the source of these feelings. Help your child express anger positively, without resorting to violence.
- Promote mutual respect and trust. Keep your voice level down — even when you don't agree. Keep communication channels open.
- Listen to your child. Use words and examples your child can understand. Encourage questions. Provide comfort and assurance. Be honest. Focus on the positives. Express your willingness to talk about any subject.
- Look at your own problem-solving and coping skills. Are you setting a good example? Seek help if you are overwhelmed by your child's feelings or behaviors, or if you are unable to control your own frustration or anger.
- Encourage your child's talents and accept limitations. Set goals based on the child's abilities and interests — not someone else's expectations. Celebrate accomplishments. Don't compare your child's abilities to those of other children; appreciate the uniqueness of your child. Spend time regularly with your child.
- Foster your child's independence and self-worth. Help your child deal with life's ups and downs. Show confidence in your child's ability to handle problems and tackle new experiences.
- Discipline constructively, fairly, and consistently. Use discipline as a form of teaching, not physical punishment. All children and families are different; learn what is effective for your child. Show approval for positive behaviors. Help your child learn from his or her mistakes.
- Love unconditionally. Teach the value of apologies, cooperation, patience, forgiveness, and consideration for others.
- Do not expect to be perfect; parenting is a difficult job.
Learn more in the Everyday Health Depression Center.