The need for human touch
There was a controversial experiment done in the 1940s. Newborn infants were separated into two groups. One group was placed in a sterile facility and were provided with food, were bathed and changed as necessary, but weren’t given any more physical touch than absolutely required for these tasks. Apart from that, there was no communication with the children but the nature of the conditions in which they were being raised ensured that they never became ill.
After four months, nearly half of the infants in this sterile environment had died and the experiment was stopped. The babies were physically healthy and there were no physiological causes for their death. This experiment revealed the vital importance of affection and touch in raising healthy children and showed that without touch children can die from the lack of affection. Meanwhile, the second group of babies in the experiment had all their basic needs met and were also given affection, and as a result no babies died in that group.
How many hugs do we need? Family therapist Virginia Satir once said: “We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth.” While that may sound like a lot of hugs, it seems that many hugs are better than not enough.
Now add into the mix of needing human touch the Coronavirus. How are we to stay healthy when we are needing to quarantine due to the virus? Even prior to the virus, were you giving and receiving at least 8 hugs a day?
People are starting to show signs of loneliness due to sheltering in place. Yes, they are attending Zoom meetings. Yes, they are texting with friends and family. Yes, they are putting on their masks and walking the trails and neighborhood.
But what to do about needing human contact and connection?
How to tell if you’re lonely? Sometimes we don’t know how we feel. We can rely on looking at our behavior to become clearer on what we feel. Feeling lonely does not feel comfortable. So, we do things to mask or hide the uncomfortable feelings.