There are varieties of feelings that rule human lives. Among them, anger is such a feeling that is quite disturbing not only for them who are subjected to it but to the person who is showing it. Anger is entirely normal, generally healthy, human emotion. However, the problem arises when one does not know how to control anger and appears to be destructive. It can lead to manifold difficulties—causing disruption at work, in personal relationships, and general quality of life. And at the end of the day it generates feelings of an unpredictable and authoritative emotion powerfully controlling the mind.
Anger-a distinctive emotion
Similar to any other emotions, it causes physiological and organic changes; the heart rate and blood pressure mount up, and so does the level of energy hormones like adrenaline, and noradrenaline. Anger can be generated by both external and internal reasons. There are issues that hardly go along with people’s thinking and calculation. At this juncture, anger could be caused by fretting too much or thinking deeply about personal problems. Memories of disturbing or engaging incidents can apply prompt angry feelings.
There are people who are basically “hotheaded” comparatively. They get angry quite easily and more extreme than the normal person does and does not know how to control anger. There are also those who don’t exhibit their anger in loud, extravagant ways but are constantly ill-tempered and complaining. Frequently angered people don’t curse and throw things; often they withdraw socially, be in a funk or get physically ill. They actually have a low tolerance for dissatisfaction they feel that they should not have to be subjected to aggravation, hassle, or annoyance. They can’t imbibe things at a normal pace, and they’re predominantly infuriated if the situation appears in some way unjust. So its very important
There are a number of reasons working behind an angry mind. One cause is hereditary or physiological. Another reason is socio-cultural. Anger is often deemed as negative feelings; it is tutored since childhood to express anxiety, depression, or any other sorts of emotion but not to put the anger. Thus, people around usually don’t learn how to manage it or channel it usefully. Family background does play a decisive role. Typically, people who are effortlessly angered come from families that are unruly, chaotic, and not capable of handling emotional communications.
How to control anger
A few simple steps can prove to be fruitful
- Breathe intensely, direct from the diaphragm; breathing from chest won’t relax an angry mind. Do deep breathing until you gain control over yourself
- If possible repeat a tranquil words or phrases like “relax,” “take it easy.”
- Visualizing relaxing experience, from either memory or active imagination.
- No arduous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax muscles and generate calm feelings
- Count till 10. This really works
- Dancing, writing, painting, making music- all these creative activities help in controlling anger
- Discussing your mental condition with your friend or family member can be a good remedy of anger
Live like today is your last day
If you keep on getting angry always, then how can you enjoy the essences and surprises of your life? Don’t you think that your too much anger is enough to break a relationship? Well, think all positive and enjoy your present day to the fullest as if today is your last day.
Forgive and forget
It is really difficult to forget and forgive the person who made you angry. But to get control over your anger, you should forget the person and forgive him/her.
Leave the room
If you are angry and you feel that it is going out of your control, then you may leave the room for some time. If you are in office, then you can go the canteen to have a cup of coffee. If you are at home, then you can go to any single-occupancy room, such as bathroom to avoid further confrontations.
Picture a happy moment
Well, this really works. You can try this. When you will be excessively angry, just try to imagine yourself of being in a happy moment. May be it is some moment of your childhood, may be the restaurant where you had an awesome dinner or anything that you loved and want to get again. Visualize the exact situation, the smell, temperature, everything. I am sure, slowly you will get your cool.
Doing regular exercise
If we do exercise daily, then a chemical endorphin is secreted that helps us to keep calm. Thus exercise can be a good way to control anger.
An adult needs 6-8 hours of sleep each day. Lack of sleep may be one reason that creates emotional imbalance. Ample sleep can improve our mood and lower anger. You need to see a doctor if you are having chronic sleep related problems.
Other ways to handle anger
- Cognitive Restructuring is another method. It is like changing overdramatic words with that of more rational ones. It somehow calms mind generating positive outlook.
- In Problem Solving method, anger subsides automatically, but then it is not to focus on finding the solution, but rather on how to face and manage the difficulty.
- Using Humor helps to get a more balanced perspective. Making an imaginary picture or while using names picturing them in a humorous manner actually restrict anger a lot. This will take a bulk of the edge of the fury, and humor can always be depended upon to assist to unknot an uptight situation.
Following the above mentioned tips you will definitely be able to overcome anger and have a healthy relationship with all in your surroundings.