Siblings commonly bicker, and parents often are caught in the middle of the battle when their child yells — “Get out of my room!” or “No, I’m right and you’re wrong!” According to KidsHealth, 38 percent of kids said arguments occur in their home every day. If begging, whining, back talk, tattling and arguing have become part of your daily routine with your child, it’s time to implement new techniques to stop the quarreling.
Controlling Your Temper
Young children do not yet have full control of their feelings, resulting in sudden bursts of anger. Kids often use words out of anger that they don’t mean and wish they could take back. Children and adults need to work on controlling their tempers because that helps to resolve altercations. Remember, it takes two to argue, so simply state your case and walk away, if needed, to avoid further disputes.
Some issues are debatable, depending on the subject matter, and it might be OK to let your child debate an issue. Parents should create a list of rules for the child to follow when negotiating, such as no yelling, no name calling, and to be quiet and listen while other people are speaking. Many children do not like being told to do something, so parents often can avoid arguments by giving the child choices. For example, ask your toddler whether they would rather have peas or corn for dinner.
Knowing Your Child’s Limits
Parents can recognize certain conditions that can make their child more argumentative, such as right before bedtime. To avoid arguments, do not plan any outings around this time and follow a routine. Knowing your child’s limits can help you calm your child as he gets frustrated. Teach your child to find an adult when they become overwhelmed. |Adults can help enforce rules and control the situation before it becomes out of hand.
Parents must tell young children what they expect from them, and put forth the proper consequences when these expectations are broken. For example, if back-talk is not tolerated and your child back-talks anyway, decide on a consequence such as losing TV privileges for the day. Start with a clean slate each day, but be consistent with the consequences that you choose when your child begins to argue.