Here is what a couple of SCSU students thought about the recent holiday celebrated as Martin Luther King Day: "We should've killed four more of 'em, and we could've gotten the whole week off." I heard that and cringed. Prejudice, racism, bigotry, discrimination . . . whatever way it is phrased, it still means the same thing according to Webster: "a judgment or opinion formed before the facts are known," or "a preconceived idea which is usually unfavorable."
Prejudice is found everywhere, and it affects everyone, not just those being judged. Cringing after hearing the preceding "joke" was the affect that particular racial statement had on me. But I am sure that after reading that introductory phrase, some readers had an urge to laugh. People always talk about how they are "just kidding," or how we should "relax, it's just a joke." However, that is precisely the point. Joking about a race, color, or nationality is not funny--it is discrimination.
The word prejudice literally means to "prejudge." In Barbara Grizzuti Harrison's essay entitled "women and Blacks and Bensonhurst," she talks about a high school English teacher named David Zieger. Zieger wanted to clearly present the unfairness of prejudice to his freshman class. He said, "Everyone with blue eyes has to do homework." The lesson was quickly learned. "It isn't fair," they protested. Touché, Mr Zieger, touché. That particular concept struck me as fascinating. To take such a complex, enduring, and painful subject, and to be able to break it down into such basic terms and get the desired result is amazing. Although Zieger probably was not the first to use this technique, his point was made very clearly.
Growing up white with exclusively white people, I did not know the first thing about discrimination. My first experience came when I was twelve. It was our first entrance into the Girl's National Fastpitch Softball Tournament, and we were excited. None of us had reached true puberty, and we were all pretty flat-chested and narrow-hipped. Regardless, we were all girls. After beating a team from Kansas quite handily, their head coach, a male, filed an appeal claiming that some of our players were boys. Our parents were appalled, and we were scared, embarrassed, and angry. Though only twelve, I knew this was not right and we were being discriminated against because we were good athletes although we were girls. Somehow, the Kansas coach had to justify why his team got beat so badly. No "girls" could be that good. Everything was eventually dropped, and we returned, though a little shaken, to our hotel.
Of course, this incident cannot be compared to the racial and ethnic discrimination occurring hourly in this country. But, I can relate on a low level to how it must feel. I remember feeling frightened yet also relieved that my mom was there to protect and stick up for me. I was lucky. Multiplying those feelings ten times over is terrifying and unimaginable. And to think, people are made to feel like that everyday of their lives just because they were born, through no choice of their own, with a different skin color.
One of my closest friends is black, but she is not around anymore. The city of St. Cloud, Minnesota, is not exactly a melting pot of different races. She is from Kenya, Africa, and has transferred from St. Cloud State to Lowell University University near Boston. She felt alienated and constantly in the minority as a black student in St. Cloud. I used to ask her about racial incidents because I never noticed any when I was out with her. The key word, of course, is "noticed." When you are white, you tend not to notice. She said it was never any one thing she could pin down--just all the little things. I asked her what she meant by "little things," and she said, "Like a cashier giving me change and making sure she doesn't actually touch my hand." She then added, "And it's all the staring, . . . sometimes it's just people staring at me that's the worst. There's always someone starting at you--making you feel uncomfortable."
My friend chose the Boston area because it is a lot bigger and has a lot more black people than St. Cloud. She also wanted to see another part of the country and see if people were different or not. I have talked to her a few times since the move, and she says that the people are not much different. She said it is just the same out there in terms of racism.
White people cannot and will not ever truly understand the black perspective. It is sort of like how men will never truly understand women and vice-versa. It is just an impossibility. However, changing the way we treat each other is possible, and that is what genuinely matters. Regardless of skin color, every living being has feelings and deserves equal respect.
Awareness of discrimination is the first step in dealing with discrimination. Also, empathy (the ability to put yourself in someone else's shoes) might make a person think twice before making a comment or telling a joke. Eliminating racism completely is unrealistic. There will always be people who pre-judge and that is reality. However, if more people would look in the mirror, and as Michael Jackson said, "make a change," this world could be a better place to live in.
For starters, parents need to set the proper example for their kids. Young children do not know what the words "nigger" or "chink" mean until their parents use them and put them in some sort of context for them. Because just the tone of voice a parent uses can develop the entire meaning of a word for a child, parents have a tremendous influence on their kids. Admit it or not, most of us grow up to be much like our parents in terms of values, morals, and judgment. Therefore, change can only occur if we set a good example. Regardless of what those college students were thinking as they laughed about Martin Luther King Day, it was an inexcusable, degrading remark. It is the year 1991, and even though the struggle against racism has come a long way in the last thirty years, we still have a long way to go . . . a very long way to go.
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