Thus, transgender is across the traditional binary gender concept of female/male.
The transgender starting point
Currently, transgender discussions often start by identifying male to female (MtF) or female to male (FtM) transitions.
In current conversations, genitals drive the discourse.
The conversation starts with third parties (doctors) looking at natal male or female
and projecting this as gender identity. Genitals and gender identity are aligned because doctors implicitly assume that genitals and gender identity/presentation solely drive gender. Brain gender is ignored.
Thus, transgender means a male to female person with male genitalia wanting to assume a female persona or a female to male person with female genitalia wanting to assume a male persona.
Let’s make a new starting point: gender can be discussed without reference to genitals by replacing genitals with biological brain gender.
Radical? I don’t think so.
Listen and see what you think, because here’s how the conversation goes.
Who made me transgender, and what does it mean?
Asking the questions causes me to go back to my early months of existence.
This is when my brain determined my gender is female. So far so good.
But a Y chromosome gave me male genitals and gave me a male body.
The result was a gender/genital misalignment. And it might have been just a big, “So what” but for one set of players.
My brain made my gender female.
My chromosomes gave me male genitals.
So who said genitals trump the brain as gender determiner?
Hello, medical profession and government birth certificates.
Pretty much the minute I was born, a doctor looked at my genitals and assumed my gender to be male, told the world this was a fact. The state put that down on my birth certificate as proof! For the world, genitals drive gender without regard to brain gender.
If a decision must be made at birth, there really is no other way to guess at an infant’s gender. We can’t peer into the brain as yet.
But do we really have to be labeled as male or female the moment we are born? Could not the doctor announce, “It’s a beautiful infant.” Must we be labeled that day? Ever?
My parents said, “Boys don’t wear dresses,” or “You’re not a girl, you’re a boy; you have a penis.”
The doctor told them I was a boy. Who were they to argue?
Thus, genitals drive expected gender identity. The medical profession has spoken; the brain is ignored.
Thus, my gender and my gender identity misalignment started as soon as the hospital wrapped me in a blue blanket! My grandfather sent me a pair of boy overalls that were far too big!!! He just couldn’t wait for his grandson to grow into them. Notice that my gender and my gender identity/presentation are misaligned. No need to mention genitals at all.
That is how I became a transgender person. I was told that I was male based on a single pronouncement at birth when my brain told me I was female. No one ever questioned the pronouncement; they just told me to present myself to the world as a boy. They didn’t consider there could be a misalignment between what they told me I was and what I am – they just assumed there was none.
So What is Transitioning?
Transitioning is the process of changing from one state or condition to another. From and To are the key words.
Let’s return to the traditional starting point of genitals. It forces the discussion into a need to change genitals to “fully transition.”
I feel and believe I am female, but the world said, “Oh no, you are male, just look between your legs.”
To be female I need a vagina (breasts as well!).
In the from/to model, I must change my genitals to change from a male to a female.
But remember! Gender is formed in the brain without reference to chromosomes.
If we change the starting point to brain gender, with the goal of aligning gender and gender identity, genitals drop from the conversation.
Through perseverance and the willingness to risk ridicule, I aligned my gender and my gender identity.
In other words, I transitioned. But not from male to female. Rather, I transitioned from a male gender identity and aligned my gender identity with my female brain gender.
Not Male genitals Female identity
Rather Female gender Female identity
Note, and this may be the most important thing to grasp: For the years of the gender misalignment, I lived in stealth. My hidden female gender was denied by me, and I presented a male gender identity as was expected by society in general.
To get gender and gender identity alignment required transitioning.
The assumption by all has been that I am male to female and therefore transitioning from male to female. This is wrong.
Gender is in the brain. I transitioned to have my gender identity match my gender. In my mind that is transitioning away from my male identity to an integrated female self.
In other words, I am transitioning to gender alignment with gender as the driver. So why am I classified as MtoF when what I’ve done is align my gender identity with my gender?
Let’s call it what it is, female gender alignment.
No male reference here. No mention of genitals.
I love it!
The take away?
Gender discussions should start with gender, using the brain gender as the base line. Then, compare that with gender identity, and if the two are misaligned? Transition to alignment – starting with brain gender.
Stay away from natal birth sex in this discussion – it has nothing to do with gender alignment.
For a practical application let’s examine how a name change petition would look using the old and new language.
Old language: The Petitioner is transgender and has transitioned from female to male and is now living full-time as a male.
New Language: The Petitioner has aligned his gender identity, male, with his gender, male, and now presents and is recognized full-time as his correct gender.