Even in a workplace where women and men share equal stature, knowledge and experience, differing communication styles may prevent them from working together effectively. These gender barriers can be inherent or may be related to gender stereotypes and the ways in which men and women are taught to behave as children. Although not all men or all women communicate the same way as the rest of their gender, researchers have identified several traits that tend to be more common in one gender or the other. Understanding these tendencies is key in creating a work environment that fosters open communication among all employees.
Emotional Vs. Factual
In the “Forbes” article “How to Be a Part of the Male Conversations at Work,” author Heather R. Huhman reports that women focus more on feelings and tend to talk about people while men focus more on facts and logic and tend to talk about tangible things such as business or sports. In addition, women use communication to gain insight and understanding, often by asking a lot of questions. Men, on the other hand, communicate primarily to give and get information and are less likely to ask questions.
When women meet new people, they focus on learning about the other person and on attempting to earn the other person’s trust by showing an interest in him, explains relationship author John Gray. Men, however, focus on establishing their credibility by talking about their achievements, their responsibilities at work and what they have to offer. They expect women to do the same and may not take a woman seriously if she doesn’t quickly establish what she can do as a professional.
Gender specialist Barbara Annis says many men report that a woman may interpret what they say in a way they didn’t expect, causing men to feel unsure about how to approach a topic when discussing it with a woman. When women and men attempt to communicate with no understanding of the other’s communication style, they may come across in a way they didn’t intend. For example, because women tend to focus more on relationship-building when meeting new people, men may doubt their professionalism. On the other hand, because men tend to be more direct and focused on their achievements, women may perceive them as too aggressive.
Effects of Differences
The differences in the way men and women communicate can lead inadvertently to conflict, inhibiting communication between colleagues and hindering productivity. In her “Forbes” article, Huhman quotes gender diversity expert Connie Glaser, who says “The problem between men and woman in the workplace is not the fact that they play by a different set of rules. The problem is that they don’t know these rules.” Huhman adds that when this lack of understanding causes disagreement, men may be able to move on more quickly than women, for whom the conflict has more widespread and long-lasting effects.
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