Most people are familiar with guilt as a force where they experience feeling poorly and badly and self-critical when they have done something to, or desired to harm another. Even the accidental bumping into someone the street, such as where the other person falls and hurts themselves, may produce guilt even though it is not clear who was at fault. Thus we often feel poorly or badly if we feel we have harmed another.
However, there is another side of guilt. Since guilt often is a reflection of anger that is aimed at the self, it becomes uncomfortable to treat someone you are angry at in a nice way. Thus people full of guilt will be anxious when trying to be nice to themself. They will often avoid being nice to themselves caring to themselves, kind to themselves, because of this feeling of guilt. Most books on guilt never speak of the fact that guilty people feel anxious when trying to be nice themselves. They may feel anxious or frightened when they’re kind to themselves. A person full of guilt, even while being abused, will say they’re frightened when they try to leave the abusive situation. Again, it is the guilt that is causing them to produce/feel anxiety and the anxiety comes whenever they try to do something that would be nice to themselves, beneficial to themselves, kind to themselves, or considerate. It is often guilt that interferes with self caring and mindfulness.