By now, you've all heard about the bullied bus monitor, Karen Klein, a 68-year old Greece, NY grandmother, in charge of keeping middle school students safe – who instead, was verbally abused by 4 of the boys she was there to protect. They bullied her with taunts, insults and profanity, and someone filmed it.
Since the video was released, a stranger in Toronto started a fundraiser with the idea of sending Klein on a nice vacation. It has since raised over $650,000.
But the bigger issue is not being addressed. I love that the international community has rallied to send Klein to Disney World, but the root of the problem is that today's youth can be so painfully mean – and are their parents to blame?
A recent article our team created is on how to raise a gentleman and provides 10 strategies to create kind, empathetic boys who listen and have good manners (sounds like a dream, right?!). In it, the experts say that kids who are gentlemen don't bully and are less likely to be bullied. They also stand up for their friends.
The experts say that talking about feelings is one tactic to raising an empathetic child. First, ask your son how he feels about something. Then ask him what he thinks another person is feeling. You can do this when reading books, after witnessing everyday interactions or when they're older, watching the news.
Other tips include teaching boys to listen to peers, and not just focus on one's self; make eye contact to gauge how others are feeling; smile at strangers to brighten up a room; practice table manners at home; write thank you notes – and have parents be a role model for good behavior.
That leads me to the parents of these boys in Greece, NY. Do they feel responsible? Should they? One report stated that the parents wrote apologizes to Ms. Klein (their kids were made to as well), but Klein was left questioning their sincerity. However, one father apologized in person with a hug, which she said felt more genuine.
Parenting is a challenge, I know. I'm raising two boys myself. And I've struggled with how to teach them compassion and responsibility. We talk about our feelings a lot. They also have good role models, but it's been hard – and sometimes kids can be so different at home than when they are around their peers.
As a parent myself, I would feel responsible if one of my sons was a bully. I know we can't control all of their actions all of the time. But it's our job as parents to raise good, kind people. And if our child is a bully, we as parents need to take a good long look at ourselves.
Tell me, how do you think the parents of the accused boys should respond? How would you handle hearing that your child is a bully?