Changing habits is not often easy. While some people appear to be able to make change happen simply by setting their mind to it, most people struggle, fail, and try again, sometimes going through many cycles before succeeding — hence the popular saying "You can't teach an old dog new tricks." But with perseverance and a little help, you, in fact, can teach both old and young dogs new tricks.
Changing Habits: Tips for Long-Lasting Success
From baby steps to behavioral therapy, there are a number of ways to make positive and long-lasting behavioral change. Here are some tips:
- Make your old habit difficult or unpleasant. One of the factors that keep us locked in a bad habit is that it may be easier and more rewarding than a good habit. You want to reverse that balance. For example, if you want to stop playing video games and get more sleep, try moving your computer or game center out of your bedroom and into the unfurnished, unventilated basement. Likewise, people who want to give up snacking on unhealthy chips or cookies should ban them from the house.
- Make changing habits rewarding. Just as you make your old habit unpleasant, try to make your new habit easier to do and more attractive. For example, if getting enough sleep is the issue, make your bedroom more comfortable and relaxing. If healthy eating is your concern, find ways to make nutritious snacks more available and tasty.
- Get support. It often helps to be with other people who are trying to change similar habits. This can give you emotional support when times get tough as well as tips and ideas for achieving success.
- Believe in yourself. People who believe in their ability to carry out lasting change and feel competent enough to carry out the various steps involved, whether that means switching to a healthier diet or learning to use condoms for safer sex, are more likely be successful in changing habits. One way to strengthen your belief in yourself is to take note of small successes on your way to the big goal.
- Use affirmations. Creating affirmations — positive statements that support your ability to make change — is a powerful way to begin changing habits “as long as [they] are grounded in reality,” says Harry Wallace, PhD, assistant professor of psychology at Trinity University in San Antonio, Texas.
- Take baby steps. Break the process of change down into steps — and take note of your success at each stage. This will build your belief in your ability to succeed. The steps you take can include: committing to making the change, education about the change you want to make, preparation for change, practice, and repetition.
Is Changing Habits What You Need?
Sometimes the change you want to make is the right change — if you’re overweight and you want to exercise more and eat more healthfully, you’re probably headed in the right direction. But there are times when people focus on changing habits or elements of their environment that won’t achieve their ultimate goal.
“One of the major hurdles that people have in their lives is that they believe the things that are causing them the most problems are things that are external to them,” explains Charles Goodstein, MD, clinical professor of psychiatry at New York University School of Medicine in New York City, and president of the Psychoanalytic Association of New York.
You may think if only you could succeed in changing your habits, your job situation would improve and your relationship with your family would ease up, but, says Goodstein, “in most instances, it is internal problems that bring about most stresses.” If you’re changing habits and find you’re still anxious and stressed, or you just can’t seem to make the change you want, consider therapy to help you achieve your goals.
For most people, changing habits takes work and creativity. But don't give up. Keep trying different approaches until you succeed.
Learn more in Everyday Health's Emotional Health Center.