How can I attract my soul mate? Is it a myth or a reality to have such an intense and beautiful relationship in today’s world?
How do I start looking for my soul mate?
3 conscious questions to think about today.
You often get the impression that love is gone, even though the relationship seemed rosy at first. Or you have a lot of relationships and every time you don’t want to be loved. Have any of you been single for a long time and are looking for a lasting relationship? I know, many questions haunt you: Does what we call “true love” really exist and how can I attract my soul mate?
Where is your relationship today?
There are many examples of relationships in which you are not really “soul mates.” Are you in one of the following?
- Looks like you and your partner have nothing to talk about
- There is an awkward feeling about sharing your worries with your partner
- When you want to start talking, you feel like you’re bothering your partner. They don’t care what you want to share.
- You no longer feel any love or affection from your partner
- You never laugh or you rarely do it now in the presence of your partner
- There is a mental thought that your partner is there physically, but not really mentally with you
- Your partner does not have a long-term relationship with you
“We were together at a party or an event. Each time, I had the impression that we were next to each other only physically. My partner’s head was just looking around, trying to find someone to talk to as well. It was like I didn’t feel like we were good enough, just to be together. Something was missing between us. “
If you find yourself in these situations, rest assured that many will. But how can I attract a soul mate? First, let’s look at what a soul mate is.
10 elements of a soul mate
‘A soul mate is a person with whom you have an immediate connection the moment you meet. Such a strong connection that you are drawn to them in a way you have never experienced before. As this connection develops over time, you experience a love so deep, so complex, that you doubt if you have ever loved before. “
Here are some elements of a soul mate:
- It is something inner and deep. You can hear it, but it’s hard to describe, because no word can encompass it.
- Possible flashbacks. If your partner is your soul mate, he or she may have been present in your past lives. You may experience some flashbacks or “deja vu”
- You just end up with each other. Finish the sentences of others, put yourself on fire, spend too much time together.
- You fall in love with their flaws. Twin souls are easier to accept, even learning to love the imperfections of others.
- It’s intense. A twin soul relationship can be more intense than normal relationships
- You two against the world. Twin soul relationships are based on unity above all else.
- You are mentally inseparable. You may be able to pick up the phone at the exact same time. Even if they are physically separated, your minds are attuned.
- You feel safe and secure. A person who plays with your insecurities, whether conscious or unconscious, is not your soul mate.
- You can’t imagine your life without him (or her). He’s someone you think is worth staying with and fighting for.
- You look them in the eye (more than normal couples). It shows a deep connection and a high level of comfort and confidence.
- You want the best for each other. Instead of loving each other.
- Your love makes you feel free and happy.
Will I ever find a person like that? Sounds too good to be true?
Attracting a soul mate again attracts true love. When we nurture our happiness and help it grow, we nurture our ability to love. Cultivate a conscious, respectful lifestyle that includes love and compassion. Then you will open yourself to the loving energy of the universe. As a result, your soul mate will soon appear in your life.
Practicing mindfulness is a gateway to building loving energy within you.
I would like to propose 3 conscious questions to think about today. They can be useful in your search.
How can I attract my soul mate?
Answer these 3 questions.
1. What kind of partner do I think I deserve?
Your soul mate is not yet on the horizon. Because? Probably because you haven’t opened up to the loving energy of the universe. Certainly, you still don’t think this relationship can exist. And most of all, I guess you may not think you deserve it.
One of my friends was not loved by her mother. Although it never occurred to her to think clearly about all her past relationships, she was not really loved. Or the person wanted her for her physical attractiveness, to support the care of her child. Or simply, the person was not committed enough. He even got the impression that some even wanted to “buy” it by material means.
It was because deep down, she didn’t think she deserved true love. A relationship worthwhile. And the “kind of partner” he thought he deserved couldn’t get over these self-limiting beliefs.
We can only receive what we are prepared for. We never attract true love because we believe we do not deserve it. But there is nothing special that you have to do to deserve love
There are multiple reasons that have built our beliefs in the love we deserve. The psychological impact of subconscious thoughts can have a huge effect on paving the way for what can really reach you. Today build the confidence within you that you deserve a soul mate who truly loves you and for who you really are.
To do this, have the courage and wisdom to build an image of your future partner, for their souls and not for their faces. It goes beyond their jobs or occupations, and even their appearances. His mentality and thoughts … Deepen in his pure love. Sounds hard, doesn’t it?
We are all conditioned by our ego and the values that society has taught us to believe. But if you can, you will see the difference in the people who appear in your life.
Time to practice: Inhale and exhale carefully today. Practice seeing deeply the nature of things. In all its essence. Write on a piece of paper the qualities of your future soul mate. Deepen in the feelings and sensations you have when you feel truly loved and cared for.
2. What image do I build of myself?
How worthy are you to deserve a soul mate? Before building an image of your soul mate, you must first be yourself and feel its dignity.
“When I put a picture of myself, in a red dress and elegant tights,” shared one of my friends, “I didn’t feel anything. But I had 40 likes on Facebook. Again, I put a picture of myself on a farm, where I felt very comfortable, exactly who I was, but I only had 20 ‘likes’. It’s amazing how society takes importance in your outward appearance. I can’t be myself, because people will value me, “he said.
“Do you think Facebook likes are so important?” I asked him.
It’s the online world, but there really isn’t much difference. The evaluation and approval of people is very important to us. If we are not grounded, we can “drop the bait to catch the ball”: follow us and fit into the image society wants of us.
Only when you can accept yourself as you are can you have the opportunity to see yourself as your “real home,” accepting your body as it really is. Accept your mind, thoughts, and emotions as they are. Then you can rest, recover, relax and feel the inner joy and peace. Accept yourself as you are. It is a very important practice. When you build your home, you become more and more beautiful inside and out.
To connect more deeply with others, you have to deal with the only person with the shortest strap.
Conscious practices can help. They give us back our sense of dignity. By being in the present and deeply seeing the nature of things we can return to the true essence of who we are. “Consciously inhale and exhale. Then you realize that your body is a wonder of the cosmos. It comes from plants, the sun, rain and generations of human, plant and animal ancestors. You are a wonder” (Thich Nhat Hanh) .
“A true partner or friend is someone who encourages you to discover in the depths of yourself the beauty and love you seek”
– Thich Nhat Hanh –
Live carefully, stay in the present moment, meditate and cultivate silence. You will be in touch with the deepest awareness that you have within you. This paves the way for a first true love for yourself, and with this image you will attract your soul mate who will love you as you really are.
Time to practice: Today during meditation, and throughout the day, be aware of the image you create of yourself. Practice silence by reconnecting with nature and remembering the essence of who you are. Believe that you deserve true love.
3. Will I accept this partner just because I am alone and not complete?
We often fall in love with someone not because we truly love and understand the person. This is because it is a way to distract us from our own suffering. For example, we feel lonely and therefore want physical contact and emotional security.
But to find a soul mate we must first find our own “inner home” without being distracted from the outside world. The day when you can feel good alone full of inner peace and joy, is the day you are ready to attract a soul mate.
Thich Nhat Hanh once said that the first element of true love is loving kindness. Its essence is the ability to offer happiness. You can become the sun that brings light to another person’s life. However, you can’t offer happiness to someone when you don’t have it yourself.
Similarly, wanting only physical or sexual intercourse without a connection of heart and mind can be suffering. The three types of intimacy (physical, emotional, and spiritual) must coexist in the relationship of the soul mate.
How can I attract my soul mate?
First feeling whole, connected to yourself and looking forward to having those connections with your future partner.
Conscious practice: When you feel alone, go back inside your home. During a meditation sit in silence and visit your own thoughts. Ask yourself: am I really in love with this person or why would I like to fill the void in my own soul?
Practice silence and solitude. Fill yourself with the strength and loving energy that brings you back to nature and the present moment.
Having a soul mate is one of the most beautiful experiences of a lifetime. You experience a strong connection with such a deep and complex love. To many of us, having such an intense and beautiful relationship as soul mates seems like a myth rather than a reality.
How can I attract my soul mate? Attracting a soul mate again attracts true love. When we nurture our happiness and let it grow we can nurture our ability to love.
Ask yourself these three questions today:
1) What kind of partner do I think I deserve?
2) What image do I build of myself?
3) Will I accept this partner just because I am alone and not complete?
Deconstruct the image you make of yourself and your future partner. Get in touch with the deepest awareness you have within you. Consciously open yourself to the loving energy of the universe. Therefore, as a result, believe me, your soul mate will soon appear in your life.
3 common qualities of mindfulness and misunderstanding
Mindful vs. Unmindful: 5 Powerful Questions
Overcome low self-esteem with mindfulness
Mindfulness in stressful situations: 3 best tips
How can I stop being a senseless consumer?
#attract #soul #mate #conscious #approach
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Are you worried that you aren’t feeling close to your spouse/partner again?
I hear you!
You’ve always wanted a great relationship/marriage but you’ve been feeling more alone than ever in your relationship because the two of you have drifted apart. Lately, you’re talking less to each other and that’s making you more anxious and afraid that your communication issues in the relationship are too big and that it could mean you’re headed for breaking up or divorce. That thought makes you even more anxious because you’d always wanted a relationship where you’d be as close to each other 50 years from now as you were when you first got together. Instead, you’ve been fighting more often, even saying mean things to each other. Afterwards, it’s tense for the next few days before you start talking again but you know there’ll be another fight
Maybe you’ve even had couples counseling in the past where the last therapist listened and suggested a few ideas of what the two of you could try when upset, but you couldn’t remember what you’d learned so nothing changed while arguing. You’d try counseling again because you want to stay together but don’t want it to fail because staying together is important. You just want a peaceful home where the two of you are close and can then be great parents for your current or future kids.
Now the cold, hard truth. There’s a serious lack of teaching around healthy communication and then being able to disagree respectfully in our world. I’ve been a therapist for the last 25 years and I can count on one hand the number of people who’d grown up in a home where people argued in a healthy way. Emotional awareness and being able to talk respectfully when disagreeing isn’t natural or instinctual! It’s not an “either you have it or you don’t,” thing. It’s a practiced superpower!
Fortunately, you’ve landed in the right place! My training helps you and your partner learn and then remember to use the skills needed in the heat of the moment, making it easier for you to be calm, focused, and respectful, even when you aren’t agreeing! The bonus is that these same techniques also apply to parenting, then helping you have those close bonds with your kids! The time you invest in learning these communication skills benefits everyone in your home! When you know how to manage arguments in healthy ways, your kids are experiencing the effect of healthy communication which makes it way less likely they’ll make unhealthy relationship choices! It’s a win for your family:)
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2. Use a Clever Opener to Turn the Tables on a Date
But it can also be more complicated than that. This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. This online dating first message example is short and straightforward. While this advice holds true for both sexes, it is mostly directed at men, considering they are more likely to mention looks in the first contact. This is overwhelming to girls.
7 Online Dating Message Message Tips Guaranteed to Get More Replies
Clearly, this guy is a smooth talker. This example gives compliments, makes note of commonalities, and asks a question. The three most common topics are their personality, career, and interests. Many online daters pay compliments to personal appearance, so you can set yourself apart by complimenting a pet or a hobby. Maybe they show an interest in a specific band or video game that you like.
Oliver loves putting pineapple on his pizza and joking around. So share some interesting details about yourself and you may get a response asking you a question in return. Having preferences is a must if you want to have success online, but be careful about going too far. Is he jealous of newcomers? What I also love about this message is he keeps it clean.
Online Dating First Message Example and Tips
You could end up alienating your date before you can send a second message. These are definitely important topics to cover, but maybe start the conversation by asking about them and wait for your information to come up organically. If you have a pet, post a photo of you two together. Especially with the compliments you give, it is important to make sure that they are true and are things you absolutely believe.
Ending your messages with a call to action is a great way to get a meaningful conversation going. Smart online dating tips for men. The list of tips is meant to guide you in writing a good first message and picking the best online dating first message example for you. Following even a few of these tips should improve your results.
For example, maybe you both like hiking. People like to talk about themselves. With your first message, your goal is to make us want to continue talking to you. When you are straightforward, you demonstrate confidence. Some may work for you and some may not.
14 Funny Online Dating Messages (First Second Third & Beyond)
So, use an unusual greeting. And a girl like that will appreciate that you took the time to read her profile, notice what you have in common, and ask her questions about those things, creating a solid connection. And hey, some girls are into bad boys who live on the edge, risking life and limb for their lady loves. Well, shrimp zircon u pb dating it still holds true.
Everyone likes a good laugh. Try doing this once a week and see how things change for you. It gives a recommendation of something cool he can try in the future.
Sending a long message at first contact is odd. Grammar mistakes speak poorly of your professionalism and education. At the end of this article, you will see a good message example that makes note of commonalities.
You need to be able to write well. That is pretty awesome that you like to crochet in your spare time. So, the next step is to get out there and start contacting people that you think you may be interested in.
Read this list, and you are sure to find an example that you can tailor to your specific needs and use to get dates. It is good to keep the conversation light-hearted at first. Being too blunt can be a bad thing if it makes you come off aggressive. Those girls are much more likely to respond to you because you are a good fit. By listing what he found impressive about her, sunshine coast bc online dating he demonstrated that he had thoroughly read her profile.
- There are a lot of generic ones out there.
- Questions are a way of showing you are interested in getting to know the person.
- We want you to win the battle.
- Why did you like their photo?
- The girl actually did respond with her phone number.
- Try talking about particular things that interest you or details that you might have in common with your message receiver.
- You have great qualities about yourself and interesting things to talk about as well.
- You saved my dating future!
How long have you two been together? This automatically establishes some foundation of compatibility in their mind. You might find that those are bigger deals.
Online Dating First Message Example and Tips
You can get as imaginative as you want with it. This may make the person you are interested in think you do not put time into things that are important. It in truth was a amusement account it. If you're one of the good guys, wife ex you deserve an edge.
When guys write a lot more, they come on too strong. This weekend, I met a girl via Match. Last of all, we have I Hedonist making a self-deprecating joke on OkCupid. The best message gets to the point, but is not too blunt. It is a wink, but with some context.
What you choose to say in a first message will do the same. To go with our earlier example, maybe the recipient has been hiking somewhere cool, dating like the Rocky Mountains. Your first message should be indicative of your personality.
We have had great success with it on the top interracial dating sites we list in our review. That is not a good approach to online dating. Online dating first message examples tend to be all about the person you are writing to. The tone in this conversation is playful, which is what you want in those initial messages. If you never use those in your messages, you may come across as very serious an maybe even upset or rude.
2. Compliment common interests and personality not looks
However, you do want to watch out for confidence turning into cockiness. Avoid language that can come off as too assertive. So, test out some different techniques and remember that sometimes you just have to move on to another person who may be more interested. Look for girls with common interests, shared beliefs, and similar goals.
He claimed he was pulled over by a cop for texting and driving because he was writing a message on the OkCupid app. By the way, how can we communicate? Messaging someone more than once without getting a reply is the quickest turn-off you can try. These messages can look like scams or make you appear unintelligent.


Authors: A Beresniak, G Duru, G Berger, D Bremond-Gignac.
The aim of this study was to investigate potential statistical relationships between black tea consumption and key health indicators in the world. The research question is: Does tea consumption is correlated with one or more epidemiological indicators?
Ecological study using a systematic data-mining approach in which the unit of the analysis is a population of one country.
Six variables, black tea consumption data and prevalence data of respiratory diseases, infectious diseases, cancer, cardiovascular diseases and diabetes, have been studied at a global level.
Data from 50 participating countries in the World Health Survey were investigated.
Primary and secondary outcomes measures
Level of statistical relationships between variables.
Principal component analysis established a very high contribution of the black tea consumption parameter on the third axis (81%). The correlation circle confirmed that the ‘black tea’ vector was negatively correlated with the diabetes vector and was not correlated with any of the other four health indicators. A linear correlation model then confirmed a significant statistical correlation between high black tea consumption and low diabetes prevalence.
This innovative study establishes a linear statistical correlation between high black tea consumption and low diabetes prevalence in the world. These results are consistent with biological and physiological studies conducted on the effect of black tea on diabetes and confirm the results of a previous ecological study in Europe. Further epidemiological research and randomised studies are necessary to investigate the causality.


Parent workshop at School
School has conducted Parent Facilitator Orientation workshop for all its parents varying from Pre-primary to Grade 10. The parents were made aware about the importance of open communication with the child. Through various activities parents were introduced to the strategies of being a listener and its short term and long term implications on the child’s action. Active participation of the parents was the highlight of the session. Everyone shared and made connections with their day to day life. They thanked the school for the initiative and also did mention that awareness of the effect of our conversations on the child was an eye opener.
28th Jun 2019


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Barbara, 34, Budapest, Hungary
Love in the time of corona. Yesterday was very intense! My first video call date went well. I was talking only a half an hour about my eating disorder and just a couple minutes about the complicated relationship I’ve got with my mother! And good news is, I totally resisted to mention the connection between these two topics (you know, how fat and sugar are proving me I am lovable). Other things unraveled: his voice is a little thin, but he seems to be a good listener and laughed a lot also on my bad jokes, so it is totally possible that I'll marry him once. He didn’t have to walk me home, as I didn’t leave home at all, so I could fall asleep immediately after we said goodbye. I had a very intense romantic dream, but not with the guy. I found myself in the middle of a wild romance, I tried to break the legendary strong marriage of the mayor of Budapest. God, he was so sexy!! He is totally my type. We had a lot of secret dates, incl. a lot of kissing.
After I woke up I felt that I am totally in love, and looking forward to the next night, when we “accidentally” run into each other. Later in the afternoon while I was searching his photos in Google I suddenly realised that there is a significant resemblance between him and my ex. I got so disappointed, I always think I am over him. Now I have to try to forgive myself, that in these hard times I still miss him. And it doesn’t mean I want to get back together.


Written & Illustrated by Darryl Steffen
Gerald has a problem: he wants to date Melanie, but she doesn’t want to date him. They’re good friends that enjoy each other’s company most of the time, but the longer Gerald analyzes the issue, the more disturbed he becomes. What starts as an emotional diatribe against unrequited love is slowly broken down into its existentialist components, utilizing the works of Kierkegaard, Sartre, & other philosophers to focus on the central issue Gerald is unable to quell—the bizarre concept of his “minus existence”. This book is available in paperback and hardcover formats on Lulu.com. It is also available on Amazon.com.


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Love and Marriage...Discrimination
By James M. Thunder
One would expect that an article about homosexuality and discrimination would discuss discrimination against gay or lesbian people. This article is about discrimination in favor of gay and lesbian couples.
In the past few years, a few legislatures and courts have been persuaded to cull from the entire universe of human relationships one form of relationship, that of two gay men or two lesbian women, and grant the parties the right to marry (or enter into domestic partnerships or civil unions) and grant them the benefits of marriage. Furthermore, many private and public employers have been persuaded to extend employee benefits to domestic partners. These legislatures, courts and employers have been persuaded to discriminate in favor of gay and lesbian couples to the exclusion of all other possible parties who would benefit from marriage, civil unions, or domestic partnerships. There is, however, no principled basis for them to favor gay and lesbian couples to the exclusion of others.
Upon what basis do gay and lesbian couples seek to marry and to obtain the benefits of marriage? Their legal argument refers to "equal protection" and "due process." At bottom, they claim they are like heterosexual married couples in all important respects except for the refusal of the private sector or the government to recognize their relationship as a marriage. How are they married except in name only? They respond: They love each other and are intimate with each other. They live together. They are committed to loving each other and living with each other forever. They share responsibilities and financial resources for caring for each other, for children, for parents. For example, New Jersey's Civil Union Law refers to individuals who "live together in committed relationships," California's Family Code defines "domestic partners" as "two adults who have chosen to share one another's lives in an intimate and committed relationship of mutual caring," the Massachusetts court in Goodridge v. Dep't of Public Health (2003) recited the life situations of seven plaintiff couples, and the September 18 Maryland decision, Conaway v. Deane, described "committed same-sex couples" who love each other.
Yet, the law of marriage does not require these attributes (Point 1). Furthermore, if the law of marriage did require these attributes, many people not eligible to marry under current law, not only gay and lesbian couples, could demonstrate them (Point 2). So, allowing gay and lesbian couples to marry (or become domestic partners) without allowing these others to marry (or become domestic partners) is discrimination.
Point 1: The Law of Marriage Does Not Require Love, Intimacy, Common Residence, Sharing of Resources, Having Children, or Commitment
The law governing who can enter marriage and the law governing married persons, does not require love, intimacy, common residence, sharing of resources, having children, or commitment. I speak of the law of marriage, not the customs of our ethnic and religious cultures associated with marriage. Thus:
The law of marriage does not require that the spouses love each other in order to marry or to remain married. For example, arranged marriages, so long as there is consent, are lawful. Marriages entered into by a woman (or a man) primarily to obtain protection or financial support are lawful. Couples who were once in love but "fall out of love" may remain married. The law simply does not inquire into the motives of the parties contracting marriage or their motives for remaining married. The one body of law that does inquire into the motives of the parties is immigration law to ensure that the marriage is not entered into to evade the otherwise applicable requirements of immigration.
The law of marriage does not require that the spouses be intimate with each other. The requirement of consummation for the validity of a marriage no longer exists (with the exception that male impotence is a ground for annulment or divorce). Married men and women may abstain from sexual intercourse for any number of reasons, for any duration, and remain married. Not only are they not required to be intimate with each other, they may be intimate with third parties. The law of marriage does not require exclusivity of sexual relations. There may be laws prohibiting adultery still on the books, and adultery has long been grounds for divorce, but adultery does not dissolve a marriage. Married men and women are free, in this sense, to have sexual intercourse with others.
The law of marriage does not require that the spouses live together, either at the outset of their marriage or at any time during the marriage. Bicoastal marriages, for example, are valid. And, of course, that a couple enters into a separation agreement does not dissolve their marriage.
The law of marriage does not require that the spouses have the financial wherewithal to care for each other, either at the outset of marriage or during the marriage. If one abandons the other, the marriage remains. If one physically attacks the other, the marriage remains. Of course, abandonment or spousal abuse may be grounds for divorce, but they do not dissolve the marriage. There are laws concerning the financial responsibility of one spouse for the "necessaries" of another, but failure to support a spouse financially does not terminate the marriage. Furthermore, only nine states have "community property" laws whereby the financial resources are, by law, shared by the spouses. In any case, these laws, and other laws concerning a married couple's property, allow spouses to alter their provisions through prenuptial agreements.
The law of marriage does not require that both spouses be heterosexual. The law of marriage does not require that the spouses have children or, if they do have children, to love them. If they do have children, they must simply not abuse them or neglect their "necessaries," medical care, education. The law of marriage does not require the spouses to take care of any other person, whether related by blood or marriage or not, including siblings or parents, except natural and adopted children.
The law of marriage, or more properly the law of divorce, does not require a permanent commitment to each other. The law of marriage does not dictate that any particular vows, or any vows at all, be exchanged at the commencement of the marriage. Any vows are purely aspirational. No court can enforce them and the vows can be broken with impunity. The spouses have the option, of course, to remain married until one dies since marriage, unlike other contracts with specific terms, is of indefinite duration. At the same time, they may freely, at their bilateral or unilateral option, dissolve the marriage. (Covenant marriage laws in a few states allow spouses to restrict the causes for divorce.)
The only laws that are available to enforce a particular marriage are criminal laws against bigamy and civil laws, in about 10 states, retaining the historical torts of "criminal conversation" and "alienation of affections," that is, grounds for a lawsuit against a third party for interfering with a marriage. Indeed, if the parties meet the minimal grounds for divorce, courts cannot deny a request for a divorce even where a spouse seeks to avoid financial responsibility for an ailing spouse. (Some estate planners suggest that a spouse divorce an ailing spouse, even where their love perdures, in order to conserve the family assets.)
If a Martian studied the current law of marriage in the United States, without knowing how marriage is lived, the Martian would know practically nothing. As we have just discerned, the law governing who can enter into marriage is extremely minimal. The law has just six requirements: that (1) two (2) adults (with exceptions) (3) of opposite gender (heretofore implicit) (4) not related by blood (5) consent to marry, and (6) are not currently married to someone else. The law governing the termination of the marriage is equally bare. Whether the divorce is unilateral or bilateral, a court must grant it. No governmental body may initiate the termination of a marriage; (by comparison, the government may initiate the termination of a parental relationship with a child). And the grounds for divorce are minimal and easy to satisfy.
When our focus is solely on the law of marriage, gay and lesbian couples are simply two men or two women who meet the minimal requirements of the law for marriage (number, age, lack of kinship) who wish to marry. It is incorrect to state, as does the plurality opinion in Goodridge, that "same-sex couples are willing to embrace marriage's solemn obligations of exclusivity, mutual support, and commitment to one another," since civil marriage the only type of marriage at issue in Goodridge and other cases on same-sex marriage does not require this. Civil marriage has no obligations, no commitments, solemn or otherwise. By the law of marriage, almost everyone is eligible to marry and to remain married. They may marry for any reason for any length of time and under any living arrangements.
If we were to restrict marriage (or domestic partnerships) to those who love each other, wish to be intimate with each other, wish to share a common residence, wish to share financial resources, wish to have children, or desire to make commitments to each other, or any combination of these, then there would be a very large number of people eligible to marry of whom gay and lesbian couples are only a subset.
Point 2: Many Persons Ineligible to Marry Under Current Law Can Demonstrate Love, Intimacy, Common Residence, Sharing Financial Resources, Having Children, or Commitment
Our laws do not prevent unmarried adults from:
- loving each other;
- being intimate with each other (except in the rare instance when any laws proscribing fornication are on the books and enforced);
- providing financially for each other;
- having or adopting children; or
- being committed to each other.
Not only do our laws not prevent unmarried persons from such activity, many unmarried persons do engage in this activity. Many of these people cannot marry under the current law of marriage. Gay and lesbian couples are only some of them. Two additional categories of such people are immediately apparent: (A) sets of people numbering more than two, and (B) blood relatives.
(A) There is nothing that distinguishes a gay or lesbian couple who wish to marry from a polygamous group who wish to marry other than the legal requirement that marriage consists of two people. If, however, marriage can consist of two homosexual people on the principle that they love and care for each other, then that same principle would allow a polygamous marriage if the parties love and care for each other. "If...the meaning of marriage and the right to marital status is sufficiently defined without reference to gender, then what principled objection could there be to removing its binary barrier as well? If, for instance, marriage were only defined with reference to emotional or financial interdependence, couched only in terms of privacy, intimacy, and autonomy, then what non-arbitrary ground is there for denying the benefit to polygamous or endogamous [i.e., marrying only within a particular clan] unions whose members claim the arrangement is necessary for their self-fulfillment?" (Judge Parrillo's concurring opinion in the 2005 New Jersey appellate case, Lewis v. Harris.) Furthermore, while same-sex marriage is, historically speaking, novel, polygamy is not. It has historical precedent across time and space. Moreover, unlike proponents of same-sex marriage, proponents of polygamous unions may argue for freedom of religion.
(B) Similarly, there is nothing that distinguishes a gay or lesbian couple who wish to marry from two persons related by blood who wish to marry other than the legal requirement that bars kin from marrying. If, however, marriage can consist of two homosexual strangers on the principle that they love and care for each other, then that same principle would allow relatives who love and care for each other to marry. Remember there is no requirement under the law that they engage in sexual intercourse. So, a woman and her daughter who care for the daughter's child could marry each other.
(A) Polygamous Unions
If our courts, our legislatures, or our employers (private or governmental) were to recognize unions consisting of one man and two or more women, based on the principle that the man loves the women and the women love the man, then additional forms of plural marriage would logically need to be recognized.
i. Polyandrous Unions
The conventional term for a marriage of one man and two or more women is polygamy. More properly, it is polygyny. Polygamy is a broader term encompassing any form of plural marriage. Given the equality of the genders, polyandry, consisting of marriage between one woman and two or more men, would need to be recognized.
ii. "Rim" Unions
For polygamous marriages (both polygynous and polyandrous), the marriage is like a hub and spokes of a wheel. There are multiple marriages between one person, the hub, and of two or more of a different gender, the spokes. The two or more individuals of a different gender share a spouse but they are not married to each other. If polygamous marriage were recognized, however, then marriages between persons on the "rim" of the wheel would also need to be recognized. Thus, if Man A is married to Woman B and married to Woman C, the two women could marry each other. This form would be particularly suitable for a Woman B who is bisexual and for Woman C who is a lesbian but wants the benefit of marriage to a man.
iii. Interlocking Relationships
Moreover, while polygamous unions have historically been exclusive, based on the principle that, where love is marriage should be able to follow, there is no reason for polygamous unions to be restrictive. Thus, Woman A could be married to Men A, B and C, and Man B could be simultaneously married to Woman D and Woman E. These would be interlocking polygamous unions. We would devise new terms to describe the various resulting relationships, perhaps using terms endemic to organic chemistry.
Government and society have interests in polygamous unions. Such unions would provide an alternative to the maintenance of mistresses or gigolos. They would encourage adults to care for each other. There would be less reason to divorce, a form of serial polygamy. We would be more accepting of people from, for example Africa, who have a tradition of simultaneous polygamy. See Nina Bernstein, "In Secret, Polygamy Follows Africans to N.Y.", N.Y. Times, March 23, 2007, p. A1; Diane Riehm Show, April 12, 2007 (interview of Debbie Rodriguez, author of "Kabul Beauty School: An American Woman Goes Behind the Veil," married to an Afghan man with another wife).
(B) Not Strangers
The law of marriage bars marriage between blood relatives, but the degree of kinship (or consanguinity) varies by state (and country). If, however, two (or more) people who fall within the proscribed degrees of kinship love each other and wish to take care of each other, there is no principle articulated by the advocates of same-sex marriage that would allow gay and lesbian couples to marry but continue to forbid relatives from doing so.
Government and society have an interest in promoting caregiving, for example by allowing two elderly sisters to marry, see Burden v. United Kingdom (European Court of Human Rights, 2006) (two sisters sought "civil partnership" to avoid being forced to sell their common home to pay estate taxes after the first sister dies), or to ensure that a man can care for his elderly aunt or disabled nephew. They could marry and obtain the benefits of marriage.
We could also argue this: Students of anthropology know that cultures define kinship and degrees of kinship differently. For example, a Native American tribe may consider a man and a woman as brother and sister (and therefore forbidden to marry under the tribe's customs) where Western culture would not regard them as brother and sister. Who is to say that the traditional Western definition of kinship is right or wrong? Or that the Western definition of kinship matters when it comes to love and marriage? What was all that fuss about Henry VIII's marriage to his relative Catherine of Aragon? If we can change the traditional norms of Western marriage, if a child can have two gay fathers but no mother, or two lesbian mothers and no father, then surely we can change the definition of kinship.
Both the Goodridge and Conaway courts spent a great deal of time on the proposition that, the barring of same-sex marriage hurts the children of same-sex couples, contrary to the argument of those who argue that restricting marriage to one man and one woman furthers the governmental interest in favor of children. In principle, then, this proposition can be used in favor of marriage of any adults who wish to procreate children or care for children. Thus, if two (or more) relatives, such as a woman and her niece are raising the woman's nephew's children, the woman and niece should be able to marry. "[M]any people are raising children outside the confines of traditional marriage, and, by definition, those children are being deprived of the various benefits that would flow if they were being raised in a household with married parents." (Judge Sosman, dissenting in Goodridge). Four per cent of all children live in households with neither parent. (Judge Cordy, dissenting in Goodridge).
First, there are three logical legal regimes dealing with marriage:
(a) no marriage;
(b) marriage open to all adults simultaneously; and
(c) marriage restricted to certain types of adults.
The first two extremes result in chaos. Although there are some who assert that marriage is not a fundamental right but a creature of state law and could be abolished (Goodridge, plurality opinion, n.14), a society without the civil law of marriage and without people entering into such marriages would be chaotic. The second type of legal regime obviously portends chaos for the adults, for their children, and for society.
This leaves the third regime and the issue is the nature of the restrictions. Judge Parrillo's concurring opinion the 2005 New Jersey appellate case, Lewis v. Harris, stated: "[T]here are reasons for limiting the unfettered access to marriage. Otherwise, by allowing the multiplicity of human choices that bear no resemblance to [monogamous, heterosexual] marriage to qualify, the institution would become non-recognizable and unable to perform its vital function." "The legal nature of marriage cannot be totally malleable lest the durability and viability of this fundamental social institution be seriously compromised, if not entirely destabilized." As this article has attempted to demonstrate, allowing same-sex marriages necessarily reverts to a situation in which every adult could be married to every other adult simultaneously.
Second, the law, our government, our society all assume the centrality of procreation to marriage and the use of marriage to control or ameliorate the consequences of procreation. (Judge Parrillo.) "[A]n orderly society requires some mechanism for coping with the fact that [normal] sexual intercourse commonly results in pregnancy and childbirth." (Judge Cordy.) Judge Battaglia, in dissenting to the September 18 Maryland Conaway decision, would have sent the case back to the trial court so it could receive evidence on how restricting marriage to opposite genders (one man and one woman) serves, or does not serve, the state's interest in promoting an orderly, stable society, in light of the ability to procreate without normal human coitus.
More and more of our children are not born within marriage. More and more of our children, whether born within or without marriage, are not born through normal human coitus. What laws concerning marriage, divorce, and procreation serve their rights and needs?
Given all of the foregoing, may I suggest the following as this debate continues:
(1) A child has a fundamental right to know the identity of its parents and to obtain their support; this fundamental right is at risk when a child can be born outside marriage and even more so if a child can be born outside normal human coitus.
(2) Since a fundamental right must be given "careful description" (Conaway, quoting the Supreme Court's Glucksberg decision), the right to procreate is fundamental only if it occurs within marriage.
(3) As a corollary, procreation outside marriage is subject to legislative regulation; our state legislatures have a duty to regulate it with due regard for privacy and due regard for the fundamental rights of children.
(4) The right to marry is a fundamental human right, but it must be given "careful description."
(5) If there is any fundamental right to a divorce, it must be given a "careful description." And, as a corollary, our state legislatures should review narrowing the grounds for divorce.
(6) Our state executives and legislatures have a duty to encourage unmarried persons to marry and to promote marriage as a permanent bond. (While public recognition and the benefits of marriage draw gay and lesbian couples, they have not served as sufficient incentive for heterosexual couples.)
(7) Although it may be in the best interests of children to have two parents and to have them married to each other, it does not follow that any adults having or caring for children should be eligible to marry. Children may follow marriage, but marriage does not necessarily follow children.
MY FINAL OBSERVATION IS THIS: Lawyers, legislators, judges and policy analysts cope continuously with complexity. If they take a step back and look at the requirements to marry and to remain married, they see that the law and structure of marriage is so minimal, so simple. It is an example of what mathematicians call elegance like Einstein's equation E = mc2:
One man one woman indivisible.
As the poet Keats wrote in his "Ode on a Grecian Urn": "Beauty is truth, truth beauty."
James M. Thunder is a former general counsel of Americans United for Life whose master of art's degree was on marriage. This article is dedicated to the late David Orgon Coolidge, founder of the Marriage Law Project.
This article appeared on The American Spectator's website at www.spectator.org on October 9, 2007.


Apr 26, 2012 You cant really make someone fall in love with you. However, you can improve your chances by being friendly with them, taking a genuine interest in them, and acting confident, kind, and respectful. Dress in clothes that flatter you and make you feel confident, and take care of your hygiene so you look and smell your best.
For example, if they smile a lot when youre around or when youre talking with each other or if they contact you regularly. Does your crush like you? Quiz. So youre wondering if your crush actually likes you. With dating apps, its easy. If they swiped right on you, chances are, they even find you attractive. But this is real life.
Soon you will see the Subtle Signs Your Crush Likes You Through Texting. 7. Improve Your Looks. Heart matters more than looks, but its our face that shown up first, not the heart. Cut your hair, shave, and use a good fragrance to make her loves to be around with you and cant take her eyes off of you. 8.
If other people trust you, your crush will start to trust you too. 16. Be Responsible Of Your Action. Responsibility makes you seem more mature and more likeable. 17. Never Talk Bad About Anyone. Remember, what you say about someone is only a reflection of who you are. 18. Be Humorous. Humour can absolutely capture his heart. 19. Be Generous
Sep 26, 2021 If yes, does your crush likes you? This quiz might help you out to find it to some extent. Answer some fun questions and we hope you get a Yes. So, take the quiz, try your luck, find out All the best. Questions and Answers 1. Do his friends treat you differently? Do they often tease him when you are around? A.
Dec 06, 2020 Does Your Crush Like You Back? Theres only one way to tell (this quiz). by duckfeet112. Community Contributor. 6,650 points.
Jan 19, 2020 3. Show off your sense of humor. Its kind of a cliche, but its true if you can make your crush laugh, thats always a good start to having him like you back. Ive been on a
The real ways to make your crush notice you without talking to him is to start helping people which is driven by the kindness in your heart. 10. Focus On Making Your Life Better. Dont compare your life and be envious of others. Start to tend your own garden and radiate joy so that people will flock towards you.
Nov 30, 2021 4. They make casual physical contact. Handshake, high fives, and hugs are common forms of physical contact between platonic friends. If your crush makes physical contact more often and in other forms, such as giving you an encouraging pat on the back or holding your hand when youre upset, it could indicate they have deeper feelings towards you.
Apr 17, 2021 If you engage in small talk with the guy you like and maybe tell him a secret you havent told anyone before (or so as far as he knows),
Feb 01, 2018 This is especially tricky if you have no mutual friends, seem to have nothing in common, or worsetheyre taken Deciphering the clues of someone you have feelings for can be hard. However, ask for help and it will come to you. Weve designed this quiz to help you figure out if your crush likes you back. Take it and find out Question 1.
Mar 20, 2021 Does your crush like you? Its time to figure it out. by Joanna Borns. BuzzFeed Contributor. BuzzFeed Quiz Party Take this quiz with friends in
Sep 26, 2021 Are you wondering does your school crush like you? But, you are clueless about their feelings. This is a quiz for the girls to see if your crush likes you the same way you want them The quiz is probably more suitable for middle-schoolers, but high school works too So, take it and answer all the questions honestly. 1.
Its possible to get your crush to like you (if thats what you want), but how long are you willing to wait for that? 11 Ways To Make Him Regret. Were all grown-ups (your age doesnt matter right now) its okay for someone not to feel the same way about you. To be honest, its better now than later, trust me.
Jan 21, 2020 Girls ages 10-13, does your crush like you? Does My Crush Like Me Back? (Quiz For Girls Ages 10-13) . Highly accurate Does HE like me back? quiz FOR GIRLS ONLY Because knowing these things can save you from worrying and free your mind for other important tasks (such as schoolwork, ahem). Remember, you MUST be completely honest ...
How To Know If Your Crush Likes You . How to know if your crush likes you? Lucky for us, there are some ways to assess if your crush likes you back. There are many signs that he or she has a crush on you, and the Does My Crush Like Me Back Quiz will help you evaluate if the feelings of your crush are mutual.
Jan 11, 2018 Take The 60 Second Test To See If Your Crush Likes You. We know what its like to be head over heels for someone to pine after them for months -- sometimes even years-- with no clear-cut sign that they feel the same way. Its a rough situation to be in for sure, which often results in you putting a lot of other romantic options on the back ...
Aug 12, 2021 53. That awkward moment when your crush has asked you who your crush is. Unknown. 54. You are the last person I thought I would fall for and at the same time, falling for you makes all the sense in the world to me. Unknown. 55. Maybe the fantasy is better than the reality, but I would love to see what happens if we can be ...
You Need to Create Space For Mystery to Happen. 4 Tips to Turn Things Around When Your Crush Likes Another Guy More Than You. Tip 1 Stop Getting Hung Up On Just That One Girl. Tip 2 Start Talking to MORE WOMEN. Tip 3 Realize That a
Oct 12, 2021 12 Psychological Tips to Attract Your Crush Towards You. Olivia Anderson. Follow. ... Warm up slowly and always be true to yourself
Jan 04, 2017 When your crush notices that, they will use the excuse to start a real conversation with you. In case that your crush does not realize it, you also have nothing to lose. 3. Make Use Of Social Media If you know the Facebook page of your crush, you can comment on something that they also comment on, as long as the two of you have a common friend.
Jun 18, 2018 If youve had a crush for a while but still cant figure out if they like you, or even know youre alive, consider taking their zodiac sign into account. Knowing when they were born can tell you a surprising amount about what they look for in a potential partner.
Feb 22, 2021 You will immediately fail if you cheat yourself and doubt your capabilities. Things like height, weight, color, or lack of hair are not at all a cause for frustration. She also has flaws, but you like her, so feel free to try to conquer your star. Everyone Fascinated with Compliments. How to learn to give the best compliments to your crush?
Dont make this person feel as if they have to respond by saying that they feel the same way about you too. 6. Dont put pressure on the situation. It is obvious that you would like your crush to respond by telling you that they like you back, but this is not always going to be the case.
If you follow these steps, youll surely be able to talk to your crush and make them like you back in no time. But for it to be really effective 100% of the time, you need to make sure your crush notices you and gets interested in you first, in all the right ways.
Jul 31, 2020 The better you are in your niche of study/work, the better the chances of your crush noticing you and getting impressed by you. So youre not just going to get your crushs attention and accolades, you will get better at what you do. The bottom line is, to impress your crush, you have to stay out of your shadows. Be noticeable 2.
You may feel like you are forcing your crush to talk to you or spend time with you. They might always come up with excuses for ignoring you or turning you down. And that is a sign they are not interested in you. Friend-zoning. Maybe your crush likes you as a friend. If they are nice to you but only in a friendly way, perhaps you should stop ...
You are having a huge crush on someone but it seems like that person does not give you attention. Or, you feel your partner is losing interest in you.. No need to worry as you can now consult a spell caster for a spell to make someone obsessed with you.
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Dec 02, 2019 Granted, this can make it hard to tell if your crush likes you or like likes you, and the risk of losing a good friend can be scary, but if you start picking up on signs that your friend has a crush on you, it might be worth making a
Make Someone Feel Special over Text. Another trick to make someone like you over text is to stroke their ego. Let them know theyve made a positive impact on you and that theyre still on your mind. An example of this would be I just saw the cutest little squirrel in the park gathering nuts and it made me think of you.
Romantic things to say to your crush. Want to make your crush feel better about themselves and being with a romantic person like you, then our next list is perfect for you. Tell her that you are always available to her and that you are the person nearest to her she can call at any moment. 1. Spending time with you itself becomes special for me. 2.
Apr 08, 2020 Pet it, make cute faces. -touch your hair. not in a weird way but like move it once in a while -talk more. on zoom you cant really hear other people talking, so when you talk you will show up on their screen. -lastly if you dont have a uniform, wear nice clothes. look presentable, and brush your hair, make sure your background isnt messy.
You also dont want to make your crush feel like their response to your declaration is the be-all and end-all for you. Be yourself, be confident, and be strong. 14. Dont pressure them into responding. When you do finally tell your crush how you feel, its important you dont pressure them into responding to you straight away.
Does Your Crush Like You Quiz for Girl. When most girls have crushed it is actually very romantic and inspiring. They make falling in love a very interesting thing that makes them even more attractive. When they have a crush on someone it is more obvious because they become weak and unable to tell, most of the time if the other person likes ...


I don't go on Myspace often, if at all. But I will typically approve a friends request if the person seems vaguely familiar to me.
Facebook is generally where I friend all the people I'm acquainted with on a fairly extensive level--meaning we've spent time together at some point in time.
And livejournal. My livejournal friends list is reserved for any of several categories of people: a) people whom I do not know, but share multiple common interests with, and who're interested in reading about my life (and vise versa). These people have no connection to me other than livejournal, typically. b) people I know pretty well, and trust implicitly after years of friendship, and c) people whom I've met, immediately clicked with, and want to become closer to.
I value all of the above groups pretty highly, and the common theme among all of them is trust. With the first group, I can trust them not to judge me or use what I write against me because they have no idea who I am other than what I type. With the second, I've known them so long that I understand their character pretty well, and with the third, I take a risk and let them in in the hopes of fostering a better friendship.
If I choose not to friend you on livejournal, or if I de-friend you at some point in time, the issue at hand was probably related to trust. If you're one of the people I thought I knew well after an extensive friendship, but then you make sniping comments about me under your breath, or frequently filter me out of your journal entries, you'll probably get defriended. It doesn't mean I don't like you, or don't want to spend time with you...it means I don't trust you to be inside my head, reading about my thoughts and dreams and desires and whatever else I choose to put on livejournal. If you are someone I'm acquainted with, and I don't friend you, it isn't because I harbor a secret hatred for you, just that I don't feel like I know you well enough to let you know me in this way. Yes, even if we have the same circle of friends and frequently see each other--that doesn't equate to closeness.
I don't think that any of the above is confusing or unfair. This is a forum for me to share things about myself that I don't normally feel comfortable sharing in other places.
In other words, this is my way of announcing that I'm doing a friends cut.
If you've been defriended, and feel like I was mistaken about you, I'm all about second chances.


A few months back we brought you an interview with one of John Daly’s ex wives, who shed plenty of light on what it was like to be with perhaps the craziest golfer ever. Now, Leila Shennib, an ex-girlfriend of former Major League Baseball player Jose Canseco, is here to do the same, only without a book this time — at least she doesn’t have one yet.
If you follow Canseco on Twitter, you’ll know Shennib has been the subject of many spiteful tweets in recent weeks, particularly after the two of them parted ways. At one point shortly after their breakup, Canseco used Twitter to propose to Shennib. It wasn’t that long after that, still not happy with the way things were going, he tweeted her phone number.
Shennib says those tweets resulted in many angry calls and text messages from folks angry with her. Now she’s here to tell her side of the story about a man she says has threatened both her and her mother due to a violent temper that may or may not be related to steroids.
Leila Shennib joined 106.7 The Fan in Washington D.C. with The C and O Show to discuss how long she and Canseco dated, how it ended, what made him tweet her phone number out, another tweet in which Canseco proposed to her, if he has threatened her, why she hasn’t attempted to get a restraining order, a time that he threatened her mother and if she thinks steroids have helped lead him to this attitude and personality that he has today.
How long did you guys date?:
“I think it was about a year and a half, two years. … Yeah, [we had talked about marriage]. After dating for about a month, he was talking about marriage all the time. After a year, year and a half, I was considering it and we were seriously talking about marriage and kids and everything.”
What happened to make Canseco go off on Twitter, giving your phone number out, etc.?:
“I think everyone who has Twitter or knows anything about Jose knows he likes to go on his little rants and he really doesn’t have much credibility. I think anyone with half a brain can look at this situation and see there’s got to be something missing here. I broke up with him about two or three months ago and he has tried every avenue to get back together with me. … He got a job in Arizona, so he went out to Arizona, thank God. … One day he would say, ‘I love you, I’ll do anything, I want to marry you.’ Then, the next day, he would be saying horrible things about me and harassing me and making up lies about me.”
On the June 8 post on Twitter where he proposed to you:
“I guess, after trying every other way, to ask me to marry him, that was his only other option. At that point, I had already blocked his phone numbers, blocked him on Facebook. I’ve been trying to get rid of him and he just keeps popping up somehow.”
What was the thing that made you break up with him?:
“He just has a lot of issues and I just feel like I would like to be treated a certain way. I spent our entire relationship giving everything up for him and defending him the entire time. He did me pretty dirty and after finding out some things, I just evaluated our relationship and I had to get out.”
What did you find out?:
“I’ll save that for another time.”
Has he threatened you at all?:
“He has, just recently on Facebook. I don’t really want to get too much into it, but he’s just a scary guy. He’s big and he has some anger problems, so even him getting all riled up and upset and even talking about something he might not mean is scary. I don’t really know what he means.”
Have you tried to get a restraining order?:
“At this point I’m going to have to do that because he’s not stopping. As you can see, he tweeted my number and things about me one night. I thought, out of all the calls from people that are attacking me about this, I thought, on the other end, people would be saying [to Jose], ‘What the hell are you doing? You can’t do that.’ But then he did the same exact thing the next night.”
A funny story that occurred right before Canseco tweeted the phone number:
“Right before he wrote the first tweet about my number and all that stuff, he was calling me nonstop, as usual. … And I was with my mom and my mom goes, ‘Well, let me just talk to him.’ I’m like, ‘Mom, no, I don’t want him to say anything, I don’t want you involved.’ … Right now I’m just kind of laughing at the whole situation because he’s a big joke to me, but if he says something to my mom, it’s a whole different story. So my mom gets on the phone with him and, very calmly and nicely, is just trying to ask him to leave her daughter alone. And he threatens my mom, says, ‘Leila’s going to regret this,’ and he starts yelling and swearing at my mom and then hangs up.”
Do you think that steroid use has led to some of his behavior?:
“Honestly, I don’t know if it’s the steroids. Sometimes I think the reason why he is the way he is is because he has been through things in his life that no one else has been through. … I don’t feel he has what it takes to be able to deal with those things in a mature way and move on with his life. I feel like everything that’s happened has built up … and he just likes to take it out on other people.”


Thanksgiving and Family Ties That Bind
Family relationships can be stressful around the holidays, but ties that bind families together last through time. Allow me to share my holiday story, ï¿½Two Sets of China, One Family Graced,", as a special thank you for visiting me online. I wish you strong family ties and a Happy Thanksgiving!
Thanksgiving Reflection And A Special List
Most of us associate Turkeys & Pilgrims with Thanksgiving. But there’s something else that we should also associate with Thanksgiving – A List. It’s Thanksgiving, it’s time for making your list and checking it twice; not your list for Santa, your list of Thankfulness. It’s time to make your list!
Law of Attraction for Relationships
Attraction is only one part of a relationship. I know a man who married the same woman 3 times. I guess he thought that 3’s a charm, as the saying goes. It wasn’t! After his third divorce I asked him what possessed him to think that it would work the second or the third time. Attraction...?
KARMA Train – Do You Hear It Coming?
Is the Karma Train coming for you? If it is, its destination may be Hell on Earth ... So “people get ready there’s a train a coming..." Do you hurt and betray people thoughtlessly? If so - you may have a reserved seat on the Karma Train and a ticket with your name on it...
Can You Have Your Cake and Eat It Too?
Who among us can resist a nice piece of our favorite cake? Having your cake and eating it too is often applied to wanting to have everything your own way while also appearing to be compliant in a relationship. This can be related to both things and actions. Can you have your cake and eat it too?
Cheaters, Liars, Monsters You May Know
Do you know a Cheating Monster? It seems there is an Epidemic of Cheating In Progress. Cheating Monsters are men who claim they are in committed relationships until they choose to pretend they’re not and women who think that it’s perfectly acceptable to hit on someone else's boyfriend or husband.
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Every time we interact with a person, place, or thing we are experiencing a relationship. Indeed, relationships are pieces of the jigsaw puzzle we refer to as our life.


Family conflict can be defined as an active opposition between family members. The nature of family relationships is complex; thus, a family conflict can take a wide variety of forms, including verbal, physical, sexual, financial, or psychological. Conflicts may involve different combinations of family members. For instance, it can be a conflict within the couple, or between parents and children or, again, between siblings.
It is important to mention, the term conflict is used when what is really meant is a destructive conflict. Thus, a destructive conflict be differentiated from benign or even constructive conflict.
Often a family conflict involves more than two individuals. A third family member can be drawn into dyadic conflict to take sides in disputes. Such coalitions may be short-lived, can be hazardous, or could become a permanent part of a family life. Regardless, family alliances are common and can be beneficial. For example, parents typically side with each other in disputes with their children. This helps parents maintain order and is especially useful in large families.
Families show different styles in managing conflict. There are:
(1) avoidant structure,
(2) aggressive structure, or
(3) collaborative structure
Some Resolving Family Conflict Key Points
• Be hard on the problem, not the people.
• Remember that respect is a two way street
• Use “I” statements
• Give the benefit of the doubt
• Have awkward conversations in real time
• Keep the conversation going
• Relationship is not a war; not all battles need to be won
• Be easy to talk to
• Slow down the conversation
• Accept and own the mistakes, no one is perfect
• Demonstrate you are working on the problem


Never change who you are just to please someone else. Please yourself first and then you will attract someone who is pleased with you. Date/marry at the level of your brains and self-esteem. Sometimes, relationships are a direct reflection of our own self-worth.
“YOU CAN’T MARRY “A DANGOTE” IF YOU CAN’T SUSTAIN A CONVERSATION WITH HIM.” Before you admire any man/woman, the first question is; do you have the brains to sustain a conversation with him/her? Alot of woman are attracted to men in powerful positions and wealthy men in general but are you his “BRAIN MATE”? Can he hold a boardroom conversation with you? Or are your conversations only going to be in the bedroom? Same questions also go to men seeking to marry intelligent/successful women. Are you her “BRAIN MATE”? Can you handle her brilliance.
Wise men and women admire brains before the body or SWAG. Dear men, do not look at her coca cola shape body because it is her brain and emotional state that will raise your children. Women should not only look at power, wealth and a six pack because it is his brain and emotional state that matters the most.
Related Article: Wearing Matching Outfits Won’t Fix Your Mismatched Values. Relationship Nuggets
Some men want a woman who’s below them, who’ll look up to them to make them feel powerful but actually only an equal can make him feel like the king in the most authentic way not out of fear or some obligation.
Sometimes, women do the same thing too. They meet a man that’s got potential, and they vow to get the man to realize his potential. They become his amazing cheerleader. They try to bring the man to be what they want or what they imagine him to be. But it usually doesn’t work because you’re not dating somebody who is on equally high vibration levels. If you’re constantly trying to bring someone up or get them to feel better about themselves, get them to believe in themselves, you’re basically going to be on a coach/teacher/cheerleader mode most of the time and eventually you’d get tired and drained physically and emotionally.
Find someone at your level, brain-wise and emotionally wise so that the two of you can bring out the best in one another. It will be a relationship or marriage based on co-creation. You’ll understand one another. You’ll speak the same language as each other, and most importantly, you’ll really start to become the person you always imagined yourself to be.
Related Article: The Search For A Good Man. Three Critical Things To Look For
Relationships are amazing when you find someone who is your equal because you can co-create, understand each other, and have a completely safe environment to do so. You feel safe and secure and able to expose who you really are with no fear of judgements
So, think about the relationship right now. Is it built on equality? Or you’re trying to bring the person to your level? A person who is happy with themselves will be happy with you and bring out the best in you. In brief; you can happily marry someone you can sustain a conversation with.
By Nicky Verd
Feel free to share your thoughts in the comments section below.
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Nicky Verd, a Transformational Speaker, KickAss Blogger and Prolific Writer who is passionate about igniting human potential and empowering people to pursue their dreams and take ownership of their lives.
She is also a Brand Ambassador for Global Startup Awards-Southern Africa and a Huffington Post Contributor
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Inappropriate questions always welcome.
That’s totally fine. People are allowed do what they want outside of a committed relationship, I’m not gonna stop someone from kissing someone they want to kiss just because they were the last person I kissed? Seems unfair.
Friday lunchtime. Very tense and awkward encounter.
We kinda just paid attention because we wanted to watch the movie so not much really! It was a great movie though hahah
No, and I don’t necessarily think it should either. Like it’s obviously a phenomenal experience when you have sex with someone you love, but strictly speaking I don’t agree with having to be in love to have sex with someone in the first place. Sex is fun. If you both want to do it, then do it. There isn’t any hard rules around it. (No pun intended)


One of the most important and profound experiences we have as humans are our connections with other people. Positive, caring relationships can help us feel healthier, happier and more satisfied with our lives. When things go wrong, however, they can be incredibly painful and stressful.
Why are break-up so painful?
Why do I get so attached to people who aren't even good for me?
Why am I attracted to those who don't like me back?
How do I change unhelpful or toxic relationship patterns?
Why am I constantly worrying about my partner leaving me or cheating on me?
Whether you are going through a painful divorce or break-up, trying to get unstuck from something toxic, or constantly worrying about the status of your relationship, counselling can help to heal painful wounds and take steps towards building emotionally and spiritually healthy connections.
Conflicts are a necessary part of any relationship. When we have the skills to manage our strong emotions (especially anger or worry) and communicate effectively, conflict can actually strengthen our relationships and deepen intimacy and connection.
Is therapy for me?
you engage in frequent arguments with your loved ones that leave you feeling stressed, angry or unloved
you feel needy or jealous and worry that your partner may leave you
you deeply want to have a relationship, but you run away when things get too close.
Together we can explore the root of these thoughts and behaviours and get you on a new path towards creating more harmony in your primary relationships. All relationships, expressions of self and identities are welcome!


Filipino Connections Worldwide - Chat - Video - Share
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TIME FOR LOVE PACKAGE
Take some time out of the every day and spoil your special someone with... a romantic getaway to Bunker Bay.
Our Your Time for Love offers everything you need to spend time with just the two of you in our luxurious self contained villas.
Your Time for Love package includes:
- Breakfast in room
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*Package is subject to availability, excluding special event dates. Terms & conditions apply


Weddings are a time to celebrate with family and friends. And for the couple, they also can be extraordinarily stressful — especially the planning part. The couple needs to decide on a wedding date, pick a venue, deal with a caterer, maybe commission a cake, seal all those invitations, and of course, choose your bridesmaids and groomsmen.
And you also may need to plot — or thwart — the kidnapping of your wife-to-be.
Well, not anymore. (At least not usually.) But unfortunately, bride kidnapping was a familiar ritual in many cultures until a few hundred years ago. And it’s why picking groomsmen was so important.
In modern times, marriages are usually the consensual union between two adults — and really, no one else is involved. But that wasn’t (and still isn’t) always the case. In many cultures across history, the process was more transactional than courtship-driven, and the families of the would-be bride and groom were very involved throughout the process. In some cultures, the couple could agree to wed on their own, but the man would have to ask a woman’s family for her hand in marriage. In more restrictive situations, the families of the couple would pre-arrange the match, sometimes even a decade or so in advance of the actual marriage. In other cultures and eras, the man would have agency over who he married but the woman would not; her family would decide on her behalf. And there are many other examples — far too many to list and describe here — of situations where the woman didn’t have any say, whatsoever, in who she married. Her family decided on her behalf.
For love-struck couples, that could be a problem. If the woman’s family did not approve of the marriage, there’d be no nuptials — unless the groom wanted to force the issue — by physically removing his future spouse from her family. He would, literally, kidnap her from her father’s house. As National Geographic explains, “such abductions usually masked a voluntary elopement: a way for love-struck couples to escape arranged marriages.”
But of course, he couldn’t do this alone: the groom would need help. Not everyone can afford to hire a genius Sicilian, a giant, or a master swordsman, so these young men would ask their friends to help. Originally called “bride-knights,” according to Wedding Wire, “during a large portion of the history of groomsmen, these men served as the groom’s army, fighting the bride’s relatives so that the groom could abscond with the bride.” With the young woman now free from her family, the first half of the groomsmen’s duties were complete.
The second half: protect the couple during the wedding ceremony itself. The family of an abducted bride wasn’t likely to let her go uncontested, and the couple was particularly vulnerable to attack on the wedding day itself. So during that ceremony, the groomsmen would stand by their man, ready to protect the couple from any such threat. And the one best suited to protect the couple — literally, the “best man” — was positioned closest to them as a solution of last resort. Wedding Wire continues:
Back in 16th century Europe, the best man was chosen for his fighting skills—the best swordsman. During the wedding ceremony, the best man stood to the right of the groom so that he could easily access his sword with his right hand if someone tried to kidnap the bride, or she tried to run away. The best man would stand next to the groom for most of the wedding in case of an attack—in some cases, even guarding the couple’s door on their wedding night.
Unfortunately, the practice of bride kidnapping expanded to situations where the woman didn’t consent to be married as well. In some cases, the “bride-knights” were grabbing a woman for their friend, even though she had no interest in marrying the man; similarly, as Reader’s Digest notes, “the best man then stood next to the bride during the ceremony [ . . . ] to make sure she didn’t run away.” In modern times, this type of bride kidnapping still exists in some areas of the world; as the BBC reported in 2018, “the ritual is still common in the Caucasus and Central Asia, where cases of genuine bride kidnappings also occur despite being illegal.”
From the Archives: Groom Kidnapping: Yes, that happens, too.


On the Marriage of Plants — Maria Fernanda Cardoso
In her series On the Marriage of Plants, artist Maria Fernanda Cardoso combines Carl Linnaeus' 18th-century taxonomic systems for categorising plants and flowers with more recent research into the reciprocal relationships between plants, humans and other pollinators. Using deep-focus photography to capture the sex organs of flowers, Cardoso explores the beauty, seduction and interspecies relationships of reproduction and survival.
Additional news articles:
art guide Australia - Human non Human


As soon as women see such a headline, they become upset and start thinking: Why should we keep them? If they want to flee, let them go wherever they want …
Usually, such women neither know themselves nor men at all, but they want to scream out loud that they’re not going to try anything for men because they have been trying hard all their lives and are left unappreciated.
Unfortunately, women who think this way do not want to study the art of relationships. And this is really stupid.
We live in a world full of wonderful things, so it’s really stupid to prevent yourself from taking the path to happiness or a beautiful long-term relationship.
So, why is it worth it to get men interested?
What if a writer said “I don’t care if anyone’s going to read it. Let it be boring and monotonous …” when they wrote a book?
Or the film director said “What difference does it make? It’s nonsense to keep a viewer interested …”?
Unfortunately, the same rules apply to relationships with men …
Now think about how interested you are when reading a good book. It’s intriguing and engaging.
You really want to go to sleep, but you can’t stop reading. You really want to find out what’s on the next page!
To make someone this interested is truly an art, and any woman can learn this.
Therefore, it’s time to take a look at ourselves and ask:
Am I an interesting woman?
What do I know about men?
(Don’t you ever say you know them as the back of your hand, as we’re going to prove it to you that this is not true …)
A woman who wants to establish or maintain a good relationship with her husband should get him interested—there’s NO other way.
A woman who wants to establish or maintain a good relationship with her husband should get him interested—there’s NO other way.
I have been studying various relationships between men and women for almost 20 years. I have watched a lot of couples, listened to their stories in psychological group meetings, and I have fostered various types of relationships, which made me realize what is worth and not worth doing to men.
… and that’s why I’m willing to share my findings and psychological tricks that help seduce a man or bring back the interest in a relationship that has gone cold.
At the age of 15, I started working as a model and traveling the world. I lived in Los Angeles for 11 years and enjoyed the attention of men.
During the first thirty years of my life, I didn’t have any deep or sincere relationship with a man (but I got a daughter).
I have seduced a lot of old and young millionaires (I married one), and I can honestly say I know a lot of feminine tricks to get a man interested.
I really got a lot of attention from men. Unfortunately, I did not know what to do with it.
I felt so insecure that I would run away from them rather than develop something serious between us.
I then got tired of playing with men and longed for a real relationship.
Therefore, for the past 10 years, I have been learning about myself and about creating long-term relationships. (By the way, I want to add that I do not feel like an expert in this field. Even at this level, I still sometimes feel like I cannot do anything, and I feel weak, but we’ll talk about this another time …)
I decided to write this article because, in my opinion, every wise woman needs to understand what she wants and to responsibly build relationships.
There is nothing wrong with using our appearance to manipulate men from time to time. But it’s just the tip of the iceberg compared to what a woman can do …
Therefore, I’d like to talk about how to get a man really interested so that he would fall head over heels for you …
- SECRET: a man chooses a woman based on how he feels with her
Whatever we do to impress him with our looks, intellect, or other things, it is all worthless if a man won’t feel special when he’s with you.
It’s not the woman that is most important to him but how he feels when he’s with her. Most men simply rely on the feelings they experience when they are next to a woman.
Therefore, if you want to be an attractive woman and attract a man, you have to take a look at the atmosphere you’re creating around yourself.
For example, I think my secret is …
… taking care of my inner state: I perform feminine practice and meditate. That’s why I can understand myself and other people.
When a man gets close to me, I can ‘turn on’ my femininity (attention, tenderness, acceptance, admiration of him, faith in his strength, etc.).
When he’s with me, he feels strong and masculine.
I can include him in my space (any woman can learn this while using some practices and meditation), and he will feel much better with me than without me.
That’s why he will want to come back to me.
Of course, the man is attracted to our appearance and other outer qualities at first, but the feelings that he experiences when he’s with us make him stay and come back to us.
I just recently talked to a woman who told me that her husband had left her.
She could not figure out what had happened.
The woman said they were a great couple. Their neighbors and friends considered them an exemplary family …
However, her husband left her for another woman—because she was not paying attention to his needs; she only cared about creating a perfect picture, and the man was suffocating.
His needs were completely different. Unfortunately, they remained unheard and unnoticed …
After a couple of years, he met a woman that made him feel much better … this man was torn between his family and the new found love (which was a simple woman, but he felt much better with her than with his wife), and he finally left.
It perfectly illustrates the secret of the relationships described above …
It is important for a man, and for all of us—the atmosphere our partner is creating, in which we could bloom. And if we only stick to our schedule (we cook, we clean and organize leisure time), we tend to overlook the fact that the person next to us is underestimated as well as his needs, and he feels bad when he’s with us …
- SECRET: it is impossible to keep a man interested with two main manipulative tricks that almost all of us have learned from our mothers and grandmothers
Unfortunately, most of us try to keep our husband’s interest in two ways:
- We keep convincing men that they would be lost without us.
It somewhat sounds like this: “Well, who’s going to look at you? Who will take care of you? You will be lost without me …”
The negative programming is very strong—especially if it’s repeated all the time (constant dropping wears away a stone).
In a couple of years, a man becomes a pet poodle who is afraid of losing his mistress (clever men leave such women, but there are some who choose such lives themselves).
Unfortunately, a woman will never be happy with such a man, and she will never glow …
Therefore, if you’re using this technique at home, it’s time to stop it because you will hurt yourself.
- Another way is playing a victim (i.e., constantly showing your weakness and making another person feel guilty).
This negative programming sounds like this: “I cannot live without you. I would be lost without you …”
Or: “I was staying at home all evening because you didn’t tell me when you’re getting home, and I was worried. I am so sad when you’re not with me …”
Such women are not nice—and not cool.
And if something inside of you just told you that you’re using one of these techniques, stop it right now and start acting differently!
I had relied on the secrets to relationships that are as old as my grandmother until I finally learned that there are other ways to keep a man interested.
And only now, at 39, have I realized that there should be a woman next to a man and not a little girl manipulating him with guilt and weakness.
So, today, we’re building our dreams together. We’re creating common goals and visions. We’re improving our mutual communication and sex life.
We take great care of our inner state; we’re trying to intrigue each other, and we’re trying to find out what is important to us individually and as a couple, and we’re also learning to create an atmosphere for each other where we could grow wings.
Therefore, I suggest you take some time and get to know the atmosphere that you’re creating in your relationship. Take some time to realize your dreams and find some common goals with your partner.
After all, it’s not the children that connect the couple; it’s the common dreams and visions.
- SECRET: do not ever think that you know your husband as the back of your hand
Most women often say they know their husbands very well.
But in most cases, this is just one more limitation. In saying so, we lose the opportunity to get another person (who is better) and to reveal the deeper layers of a relationship between a man and a woman.
We almost do not know ourselves, so how can we know our partners this well?
It’s only natural to keep exploring each other for life and constantly finding new things.
I have noticed before that as soon as I find something new in myself, I look at my partner in a different way as well. As soon as I become more open and loving, he turns his new side to me. As soon as I finish playing the games of guilt, some new sides to our relationship open up …
I have no idea where we’ll be within a year, what emotional bonds we will create, and what we will achieve together as a couple, and this is really interesting to me …
- SECRET: three years later, your sexual life is just beginning
I get angry when I read women’s letters saying: “Well, a couple of years have passed; the attraction has disappeared … and there’s nothing I can do about it.”
Parents, psychologists, and French writers have greatly contributed to this, having published the book “Love lasts three years”, which has become a bestseller.
That is completely absurd.
After three years, when this on-again, off-again phase ends, we have this opportunity to really get to know and feel each other.
That was a real discovery for me. When we attended seminars, we realized that after a few years, this exhausting and emotional sex ends, but the couple gets the opportunity to create a deep and intimate relationship.
The thing is, we do not know how to do this.
I will reveal the techniques that we use in our sex life in the next article. I’m sure that while reading it, your heart will tell you it’s the absolute truth …
But to make it short …
It turns out that our men do not know how to make love to women; they do everything too fast.
And we, women, do not know how to tell them that it’s unpleasant for us, and we keep pretending.
However, it’s silly to expect men to give us pleasure if we do not know ourselves—what we like. (The practice “THE INTIMATE SECRET” can help you study your body.)
So, after three years, our body gets tired, the intimate area becomes insensitive because men are unable to awaken our intimate spots and wait until our body opens.
Of course, we often do not know what turns us on. That’s why we don’t want to have sex anymore.
As if our body would say: “Yes, I wanted love, pleasure, and to have a connection, but I failed to find something deep, so I’m better off doing nothing at all.”
Later on, the body starts to become ill (in an attempt to defend itself), and this is how we ruin our sex life (out of ignorance).
If you suffer from a variety of intimate problems (endometriosis, uterine fibroids, ovarian cysts, menstrual disorders, conception problems, etc.), Nephrite Egg for Chocolate Soul can help you here.
It’s just a MAGICAL secret to intimate health, beauty, and youth, which was revealed 5000 years ago, and you can make use of it as well.
I will reveal a couple of things in the next article, and I will invite women to start creating a joyful sex life.
I used to think that if the relationship gets cold, I have to stimulate them and put more external efforts. And I did: various sexy clothes, stimulating toys, ideas to bring the third person into bed, etc.
I am so glad that I finally realized that you shouldn’t look for love on the outside …
Have you ever thought that we, women, tend to wear masks in bed since we feel very vulnerable? But if we learned to really open up and to accept a man into our body with love and true longing, we would be much more interesting to men than wearing latex outfits or push-up bras.
There are great trainings nowadays where we can better learn about our body as well as our partner’s.
We must dare to be real and to talk to men gently and in a non-offensive way about what we like …
It is for us to choose.
Your sex life can be much better in 15 years than it was within the first years spent together.
So it’s possible to keep a man interested in many ways. That’s why we invite you to improve yourself, to reveal your femininity, and to learn about new areas of relationships.
Your task today is to start creating an atmosphere around yourself that would make you and the people around you feel good (this is the real charm of a woman).
We also encourage you to explore whether you’re using two manipulative techniques (“he will be lost without me” or “I will be lost without him”) and to get up on your feet while doing the practices, to discover the self-confident woman inside of you that any man can be proud of.
We also suggest that you get rid of the idea: I know my husband as the back of my hand. You can always go deeper and become interesting to yourself. You can discover a lot of interesting relationship aspects while exploring yourself …
Do not, in any way, believe that the attraction between a man and a woman disappears after a couple of years. It is only then that the real journey to the intimate world of a man and a woman begins. We just need to open it if we want to feel the magic between a man and a woman.
Change your attitude toward your body; get to know the truly exciting woman’s sexual world. You can get help from the sexual practices The Magic of Sexuality, The Intimate Secret, and The Magical Jade Egg or many articles on this topic on the Chocolate Soul website.
It doesn’t matter at all at what point you are right now … You can experience something wonderful within a week; just open yourself to this opportunity ..
P. S. We are waiting for your comments in the comments section below. You comment is very important to us.
Also, if the article was useful, make sure to share it with your Facebook friends. With your help, this wonderful Chocolate Soul women's community will grow and expand much faster! THANK YOU for your help and contribution toward improving the lives of other women ...


Mid-Week Church Meetings
Sunday is never enough! It's great to be able to meet and support each other throughout the week. There are many opportunities to do just that at Holy Trinity.
These meet on Tuesday and Wednesday afternoons and Wednesday evenings offering friendship, and mutual support through Bible study and prayer. Read here for more details.
Come together to hear plans and to pray for each other, our life together and the wider church. We meet on the first Wednesday of every month.
HT Bible Study
On the third Wednesday of every month we get together for a bible study in the Church Hall. It's a valuable opportunity to explore the Bible in greater depth and understand its implications for our lives.