Maternal and Paternal Authority Styles and Developmental Outcomes: An Investigation of University Students in Turkey and the United States
pp. 153-168 | Published Online: September 2020 | DOI: 10.22521/edupij.2020.93.3
Hamide Gozu, Joan Newman, and Kimberly Colvin
Using data from undergraduates in both Turkey and the United States, we examined cultural differences in the perceived parenting authority styles and the links between perceived parenting authority styles, academic achievement, and self-esteem. We also examined the separate contributions of fathers and mothers in each country. A total of 423 undergraduates (196 from Turkey and 227 from the US) completed the Buri Parent Authority Questionnaire to report on the parenting styles of their parents. They also reported on their own college GPA and completed the Rosenberg self-esteem measure. Some adjustment of the parenting scales was needed in order to achieve cross-cultural measurement invariance. Our study revealed that there were differences of parental style both between and within the two countries. Fathers were reported to be more authoritarian than mothers, and mothers to be more authoritative. Higher levels of authoritarian parenting by fathers was found in the American data. Some parental authority measures were associated with the students’ self-esteem, and all of these involved paternal authority. Paternal authoritarian parenting was negatively associated with the students’ self-esteem in the Turkish data, with paternal authoritative parenting positively associated with the self-esteem of the American students only. The study’s findings suggest that researchers should not ignore differences in parental authority style between mothers and fathers, nor differences between different countries. In particular, the role of fathers should not be overlooked.
Keywords: Parenting styles, cross-cultural, academic achievement, self-esteem, mother-father differenceReferences
Baumrind, D. (1971). Current patterns of parental authority. Developmental Psychology Monographs, 4(1, pt. 2), 1-103. https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1037/h0030372
Bentler, P. M. (1992). On the fit of models to covariance’s and methodology to the Bulletin. Psychological Bulletin, 112(3), 400-404. https://doi.org/10.1037/0033-2909.112.3.400
Beşpınar, F. U. (2013). Gender and family. In M. Turgut & S. Feyzioğlu (Eds.), Research on family structure in Turkey, findings and recommendations (pp. 232-281). İstanbul: Çizge Tanıtım ve Kırtasiye Ltd Şti, T. R. Ministry of Family and Social Policies, Research and Social Policies Series 08.
Beyer, S. (1995). Maternal employment and children’s academic achievement: Parenting styles as mediating variable. Developmental Review, 15(2), 212-253. https://doi.org/10.1006/drev.1995.1009
Buri, J. R. (1991). The Parental Authority Questionnaire. Journal of Personality Assessment, 57(1), 110-119. https://doi.org/10.1207/s15327752jpa5701_13
Buri, J. R., Louiselle, P. A., Misukanis, T. M., & Mueller, R. A. (1988). Effects of parental authoritarianism and authoritativeness on self-esteem. Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, 14(2), 271-282. https://doi.org/10.1177%2F0146167288142006
Chao, R. K. (2001). Extending research on the consequences of parenting style for Chinese Americans and European Americans. Child Development, 72(6), 1832-1843. https://doi.org/10.1111/1467-8624.00381
Checa, P., Abundis-Gutierez, A., Perez-Duenas, C., & Fernandez-Parra, A. (2019). Influence of maternal and paternal parenting style and behavior problems on academic outcomes in primary school. Frontiers in Psychology, 10, Article 3389. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2019.00378
Chen, F.F. (2008). What happens if we compare chopsticks with forks? the impact of making inappropriate comparisons in cross-cultural research. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 5, 1005–1018. https://doi.org/10.1037/a0013193
Çuhadaroğlu, F. (1986). Adölesanlarda Benlik Saygısı[Self-Esteem in Adolescents], Hacettepe University, Medical School, Department of Psychiatry, Yayımlanmamış Uzmanlık Tezi [Unpublished Master’s thesis], Ankara.
Elphinstone, B., Siwek, Z., & Oleszkowicz, A. (2015). Assessment of the parental authority questionnaire-short in Australian and Polish samples. European Journal of Developmental Psychology, 12(4), 482-495. https://doi.org/10.1080/17405629.2015.1047338
Fagan, J., Day, R., Lamb, M E., & Cabrera, N. J. (2014). Should researchers conceptualize differently the dimensions of parenting for fathers and mothers? Journal of Family Theory & Review, 6(4), 390-405. https://doi.org/10.1111/jftr.12044
Ferial, Z., Abeer, S., & Uchechukwu, O. (2019). Influence of parenting style on the visually impaired adolescents and their self-esteem - analysis based on a Saudi population. Biomedical Journal of Scientific & Technical Research, 19(5), 14607-14613. http://dx.doi.org/10.26717/BJSTR.2019.19.003363
Frost, G. S. (2009). Victorian childhoods. Praeger.
Furnham, A., & Cheng, H. (2000). Perceived parental behaviour, self-esteem and happiness. Social Psychiatry and Psychiatric Epidemiology, 35, 463-470 https://doi.org/10.1007/s001270050265
Grusec, J. E., & Goodnow, J. J. (1994). Impact of parental discipline methods on the child’s internalization of values: A reconceptualization of current points of view. Developmental Psychology, 30(1), 4-19. https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1037/0012-1622.214.171.124
Guastella, D. D., Guastella, S. J., & Brigss, J. M. (2014). Parenting style and generativity measured in college students and their parents. SAGE Open, 4(1), 1-9. https://doi.org/10.1177%2F2158244013518053
Kline, R. B. (2005). Methodology in the social sciences. Principles and practice of structural equation modeling (2nd ed.). Guilford.
Lansford, J. E., Bornstein, M. H., Deater-Deckard, K., Dodge, K., A., Al-Hassan, S. M., Bacchini, D., Bombi, A. S., Chang, L., Chen, B.-B., Di Giunta, L., Malone, P. S., Oburu, P., Pastorelli, C., Skinner, A. T., Sorbring, E., Steinberg, L., Tapanya, S., Alampay, L. P., Uribe Tirado, L. M., & Zelli, A. (2016). How international research on parenting advances the understanding of child development. Child Development Perspectives, 10(3), 202-207. https://doi.org/10.1111/cdep.12186
Li, Y., Costanza, P. R., & Putallaz, M. (2010). Maternal socialization goals, parenting styles, and social-emotional adjustment among Chinese and European American young adults: Testing a mediation model. The Journal of Genetic Psychology, 171(4), 330-362. https://doi.org/10.1080/00221325.2010.505969
Luk, J. W., King, K. M., McCarty, C. A., Vander Stoep, A., & McCauley, E. (2016). Measurement invariance testing of a three-factor model of parental warmth, psychological control, and knowledge across European and Asian/Pacific Islander American youth. Asian American Journal of Psychology, 7(2), 97–107. https://doi.org/10.1037/aap0000040
MacCallum, R. C., Browne, M. W., & Sugawara, H. M. (1996). Power analysis and determination of sample size for covariance structure modeling. Psychological Methods, 1(2), 130-149. https://doi.org/10.1037/1082-989X.1.2.130
McKinney, C., Milone, M. C., & Renk, K. (2011). Parenting and late adolescent emotional adjustment: Mediating effects of discipline and gender. Child Psychiatry and Human Development, 42, 463-481. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10578-011-0229-2
McKinney, C., & Renk, K. (2008). Differential parenting between fathers and mothers: Implications for late adolescents. Journal of Family Issues, 29(6), 806-827. https://doi.org/10.1177%2F0192513X07311222
Metindoğan, A. (2015). Fathering in Turkey. In J. L. Roopnarine (Ed.), Fathers across cultures (pp. 327-349). Praeger.
Möller, E. L., Nikolić, M., Majdandžić, M., & Bögels, S. M. (2016). Associations between maternal and paternal parenting behaviors, anxiety and its precursors in early childhood: A meta-analysis. Clinical Psychology Review, 45, 17-33. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.cpr.2016.03.002
Oyserman, D., Coon, H. M., & Kemmelmeier, M. (2002). Rethinking individualism and collectivism: Evaluations of theoretical assumptions and meta-analyses. Psychological Bulletin, 128(1), 3-72. https://psycnet.apa.org/doi/10.1037/0033-2909.128.1.3
Perez-Gramaje, A. F., Garcia, O. F., Reyes, M., Serra, E., & Garcia, F. (2019). Parenting styles and aggressive adolescents: Relationships with self-esteem and personal maladjustment. The European Journal of Psychology Applied to Legal Context, 12(1), 1-10. https://doi.org/10.5093/ejpalc2020a1
Preisner, K., Neuberger, F., Bertogg, A., & Schaub, J. M. (2020). Closing the happiness gap: The decline of gendered parenthood norms and the increase in parental life satisfaction. Gender & Society, 34(1), 31-55, http://dx.doi.org/10.1177/0891243219869365
Putnick, D. L., & Bornstein, M. H. (2016). Measurement invariance conventions and reporting: The state of the art and future directions for psychological research. Developmental Review, 41, 71-90. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.dr.2016.06.004
Rosenberg, M. (1965). Society and the adolescent self-image. Princeton University.
Sorkhabi, N. (2005). Applicability of Baumrind’s parent typology to collective cultures: Analysis of cultural explanations of parent socialization effects. International Journal of Behavioral Development, 29(6), 552-563. https://doi.org/10.1080/01650250500172640
Spera, C. (2005). A review of the relationship among parenting practices, parenting styles, and adolescent school achievement. Educational Psychology Review, 17, 125-146. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10648-005-3950-1
Steinberg, L., Blatt-Eisengart, I., & Cauffman, E. (2006). Patterns of competence and adjustment among adolescents from authoritative, authoritarian, indulgent, and neglectful homes: A replication in a sample of serious juvenile offenders. Journal of Research on Adolescence, 16(1), 47-58. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1532-7795.2006.00119.x
Triandis, H. C. (1995). Individualism and collectivism. Westview.
Tunç, A., & Tezer, E. (2006). The relationship between parenting style and self-esteem. Turkish Psychological Counseling and Guidance Journal, 3(25), 37-44. https://dergipark.org.tr/en/pub/tpdrd/issue/21445/229640#article_cite
Waterman, E. A., & Lefkowitz, E. S. (2017). Are mothers’ and fathers’ parenting characteristics associated with emerging adults’ academic engagement? Journal of Family Issues, 38(9), 1239-1261. https://doi.org/10.1177%2F0192513X16637101
Wintre, M. G., & Yaffe, M. (2000). First-year students’ adjustment to university life as a function of relationships with parents. Journal of Adolescent Research, 15(1), 9-37. https://doi.org/10.1177%2F0743558400151002
World Bank. (2017). Labor force. The World Bank. http://data.worldbank.org/indicator/SL.TLF.TOTL.FE.ZS
Xu, L. (2019). Scale development and factor analysis. In V. C. X. Wang (Ed.), Scholarly publishing and research methods across disciplines (pp. 159-183). IGI-Global.


Monday, July 26, 2010
Midsummer Night's Dream Swap --week 2
Hello Sweet Swappers! We hope by now that you and your partner have exchanged emails and found out a little more about each other so that you can put together packages that you each love. If any of you have contacted your partner but have not yet heard back from her, please email us ASAP at email@example.com so we can sort things out!


CANCER - February 2024
Overall: Cancer, February beckons you to prioritize emotional well-being and deepen your connections with others. Take the time to reflect on your goals, and embrace the transformative power of vulnerability. Trust your intuition and let your emotions guide you toward personal growth. This month offers an opportunity to nurture your relationships and create a sense of security in your emotional landscape. As you navigate the ebb and flow of your feelings, find comfort in the stability that arises from within.
Love & Relationships: Emotional connections deepen, fostering a sense of security. Singles may find love in familiar environments. Couples strengthen bonds through heartfelt conversations. Mid-February brings enhanced romantic vibes.
Career & Finance: Professional growth is rooted in emotional intelligence. Trust your instincts in decision-making. Financial stability is achievable, especially if you focus on long-term investments. Opportunities arise mid-month.
Health & Wellness: Prioritize emotional well-being. Engage in activities that bring comfort and peace. Physical health is interconnected with your emotional state. Late February encourages a serene and balanced mindset.
Key Dates: February 12th, 18th, 25th
Lucky Colors: Silver, White Lucky Places: Cozy Cafes, Seaside Retreats


• Ring with hearts made of 925 Sterling silver• Open designed composition with two heart-shaped ends, one of them with zirconia-pavé• A special gift-idea for Valentine’s Day, Birthday, or other occasionsOpen your heart: This ring with hearts impresses with its unusual open design made of high-quality 925 Sterling silver. It is inspired by true love and real relationships. That is why both ends are shaped like hearts. One heart is hand-set with white sparkling zirconia pave.The heart ring will remind you that love is the most important thing in life. With its clear look, it is an ideal everyday companion and at the same time a meaningful good luck charm, due to its symbolism.


“Motherhood: All love begins and ends there.” —Robert Browning
It's Mother's Day! A day to celebrate women everywhere who devote their hearts and lives to loving and raising children, and showing us the meaning of unconditional love.
Although I'm not a mom myself yet, I am lucky to be surrounded by so many incredible mothers in my life. Women whom I admire, and hope to some day emulate. And so today I honor these mothers for the amazing women they are, for the amazing little ones they are raising (or have raised), and for teaching me in their own ways what love really is.
The first person to love me just for being me. The woman who I owe my very being to, and who has spent the greater part of her life taking care of me and my sisters, and asking nothing in return. That's something I still can't wrap my head around. There's no way I could even being to repay her for her years of sacrifice, worry and devotion. Perhaps the best I can do is just be the best person I can, the person she raised with all the compassion and love in her heart. Oh and maybe apologize for that time I shoved a blueberry up my nose which required a visit to the ER!
Don't they both have the most amazing, good looking families?! Here's hoping my future spouse and children are at least half as attractive as they all are! But seriously, my sisters are both incredible moms. The bond between sisters is unlike any other and it's been amazing to watch both of them blossom into this next phase of their life right before my eyes. Plus, I am now Aunt to 3 kids who I love more than I thought was even possible! Their children are a true testament to the kind of mothers my sisters are - sweet, loving, and funny as hell!
The two best friends a girl could ask for.
Just two more incredibly attractive families here! These two women are my childhood friends, and feel just as much like sisters as my 'real' sisters. Once again, it has made me so happy to watch them find their lifelong partners and then eventually start families. Maybe my happiness is a little selfish as well, because I got to be 'Aunt' to their children before my sisters ever had their kids. I will always be grateful to them for letting me be a special part of their children's lives and for bearing witness to the work they do each and every day to raise these kind, smart and hilarious little beings.
Also in my heart but not pictured: This post goes out to my grandmothers, Mary and Alberta; my great gram, Barbara; all of my cousins who are mothers - Joyce, Theresa, Becky and Megan; my aunts - Diane, Fay, and Ellen. To all of my other friends around the country who are moms, to my Nanny Moms, and to all of you out there who are Moms, Moms-to-Be, Grandmothers, Great Grandmothers, Aunts, Honorary Aunts, or those who play a special part in raising a child - Happy Mother's Day. Or really, what is means to me is Happy LOVE Day. I hope to one day join your ranks in raising blessed little souls of my own!
“Biology is the least of what makes someone a mother.” —Oprah Winfrey


Thank you for a wonderful weekend in LA. You have worked extremely hard to put this together, you and your team, and you created something magical. It takes enormous strength to organize an event of this size, and you have done so beautifully. Thank you for having me on your team. I hope you both get the rest you deserve as soon as possible, and I hope to see you again soon.


When a man suspects infidelity, and its composition varies sperm
If you think that your partner is cheating on you, your sperm can help you get rid of the risk of someone else’s child to grow. According to sexologist Lindsey Doe, up to 40% of male ejaculate consist of so-called “kamikaze” or “fighters sperm”, intended to rival not fertilized ovum partner.
When a man suspects his partner of infidelity, the number of such “kamikaze” increases to neutralize the perceived threat. “Fighters of sperm”, though sperm are not intended to fertilize an egg. Their tails “kamikaze” is used as a trap, weaving them together and thus creating barricades.
However, there is a downside: the more produced “kamikaze”, the less produced sperm for fertilization, which, in turn, significantly reduces a woman’s chances of getting pregnant at all.


I asked my boyfriend if he has ever loved any of his girlfriends. After some hesitation, he simply replied with “I don’t know.” “What do you mean you don’t know?” I asked him. And all he said was, “I just don’t know.” And that alone has helped me answer a question that’s long been on my mind. And now I don’t need to wonder anymore. He doesn’t love me. It’s true I am his longest relationship. But if he gave an answer like that I feel like he doesn’t even know what love is. I have told him two times in the past that I love him. Only two times ever. But his lack of response makes it hard. He doesn’t love me.
I think my dad heard me crying cause he just cracked open my door and slid a piece of cake on the floor into my room


Looking for that special gift for someone? Your friends and family will love receiving such a unique gift that keeps their special occasion close at heart. The Gift Certificate can be mailed directly to you or to the recipient of it. Please visit the E-Store for more information.
<< All categories|


With a Family account, you can nominate up to eight family members and whenever they travel on Oman Air, 100% of the Sindbad miles they have earned for the flight will be transferred to the family head’s account! So your whole family can be collecting Sindbad miles every time they travel, bringing that dream Reward even faster!
- Family account is free to set up
- Up to eight family members can be part of one Family account
- 100% Sindbad miles earned on Oman Air will be transferred to the family head’s account
- Family members can keep their individual tiers separate from their family head
Terms and Conditions
Setting up a Family Account
- Sindbad members can set up a Family account by following the below process. Members who set up the account will be designated Family head for the Family account.
- If you are a Family head you may nominate a maximum of eight Family members over two years of age to become members of your Family account.
- Use Join now link to enroll your family members. Thereafter send the name, Sindbad number and relationship type of your family member to email@example.com. The Sindbad Service Center will verify the relationship of the nominated family members and process your request.
- Family members will become a part of the family account only if they accept the invitations sent by Family head.
- Eligible Family account relationships are Father, Mother, Spouse and Children.
- Oman Air may at its discretion request for supporting documents to support your relationship with your nominated member. Any family account member that does not belong to the permitted relationships will be removed from the family account and the Family head will be notified of the same. All miles earned by the family members until that date will remain in the Family head's account.
- Every Family account member must have a unique email address.
- Family members will be issued with individual Sindbad numbers and Sindbad cards.
- Family members will be able to access their accounts with individual Sindbad number and password.
Changes to Family account
- Changes to Family account such as addition or removal of a member can only be requested by the Family head.
- You may remove or replace only one member from your Family account in a calendar year.
Family account and mileage earning
- 100% of the Sindbad miles of a Family member earned after the date they are made part of a Family account is transferred to the Family head's account.
- Family members are eligible to accrue Sindbad miles for all activities including promotions and transactions with Sindbad Partners.
- Family members are eligible to accrue Tier miles and therefore can achieve Silver and Gold tier once they meet the required criteria. Sindbad Tier miles earned by a family member will not be transferred to the Family head's account.
Family account and redeeming miles
- In a Family account, only the Family head may request for Reward tickets.


How Your Venus Sign Reveals Your Relationship Style
Astrology has long been used as a tool to understand ourselves and our relationships with others. One important aspect of astrology is the placement of Venus in our birth chart. Venus is the planet of love, beauty, and pleasure, and it shows us how we approach relationships, how we love ourselves, what we value, and our relationship with money.
In this blog post, we'll dive into the different Venus signs and what they say about our relationship style, self-love, values, and money.
Venus in Aries
If your Venus is in Aries, you are passionate, impulsive, and fearless in love. You are not afraid to take risks and pursue the object of your affection with a fiery intensity. You value independence and freedom and are attracted to partners who share those same values. In terms of self-love, you prioritize taking care of your physical body and enjoy being active and pursuing your passions. You may have a tendency to be impulsive with money, but you are also willing to take risks and invest in yourself.
Venus in Taurus
If your Venus is in Taurus, you value stability, security, and comfort in your relationships. You are loyal, affectionate, and patient with your partners, and you enjoy indulging in sensual pleasures together. You have a strong sense of self-worth and prioritize self-care and self-love. You value financial security and may have a tendency to be cautious with money, but you also appreciate the finer things in life and are willing to spend on quality.
Venus in Gemini
If your Venus is in Gemini, you are curious, witty, and communicative in love. You enjoy intellectual stimulation and engaging in lively conversations with your partners. You value mental connection and variety in your relationships and may struggle with committing to one person. In terms of self-love, you prioritize mental stimulation and learning, and you may struggle with quieting your mind and being present in the moment. You may be comfortable with financial risk-taking and enjoy exploring different ways of making money.
Venus in Cancer
If your Venus is in Cancer, you are nurturing, intuitive, and emotional in love. You value emotional connection and intimacy in your relationships and prioritize taking care of your loved ones. You have a strong sense of family and may be drawn to partners who share those values. In terms of self-love, you prioritize emotional well-being and self-care, and you may struggle with setting boundaries with others. You may be cautious with money and prioritize saving for the future and taking care of your loved ones.
Venus in Leo
If your Venus is in Leo, you are confident, generous, and passionate in love. You enjoy being the center of attention and may have a tendency to be dramatic or flashy in your relationships. You value admiration and respect and are attracted to partners who appreciate your unique talents and qualities. In terms of self-love, you prioritize self-expression and creativity and enjoy expressing yourself through your appearance and personal style. You may be comfortable with taking financial risks and enjoy indulging in luxury and extravagance.
Venus in Virgo
If your Venus is in Virgo, you are practical, analytical, and detail-oriented in love. You value intelligence and efficiency in your relationships and may have a tendency to be critical of yourself and others. You prioritize taking care of your physical and mental health and may be drawn to partners who share those values. In terms of money, you are responsible and practical and prioritize saving and budgeting.
Venus in Libra
If your Venus is in Libra, you value balance, harmony, and fairness in your relationships. You are charming, diplomatic, and social in love and prioritize finding a partner who shares your values and interests. You value aesthetics and beauty and may be drawn to partners who have
Venus in Scorpio
If your Venus is in Scorpio, you are intense, passionate, and emotional in love. You value deep emotional connections and may struggle with trusting others. You are drawn to partners who have a mysterious and complex aura and are willing to explore intense emotional experiences together.
Venus in Sagittarius
If your Venus is in Sagittarius, you value freedom, adventure, and exploration in your relationships. You are optimistic, adventurous, and open-minded in love and prioritize finding a partner who shares those same values. You may struggle with commitment and may prioritize personal growth and self-discovery over settling down.
Venus in Capricorn
If your Venus is in Capricorn, you value stability, tradition, and success in your relationships. You are responsible, ambitious, and practical in love and may be drawn to partners who share those same qualities. You value financial security and may prioritize building a stable and secure future together.
Venus in Aquarius
f your Venus is in Aquarius, you approach relationships with an independent and unconventional mindset. You value intellectual connection, individuality, and freedom, and you may struggle with the traditional expectations of a committed relationship.
Venus in Pisces
If your Venus is in Pisces, you approach relationships with a sensitive, romantic, and idealistic mindset. You are highly intuitive and empathetic and tend to prioritize emotional connection and spiritual depth in your partnerships.


hi! my name is drew. i'm a 22-year-old pansexual genderqueer trannygirl who has recently been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. i am engaged to a wonderful femme dyke but still looking for other partners (my fiancee and i have a very complicated relationship, which includes polyamory and sleeping in separate bedrooms but precludes any substantive sexual contact between us), and have two lovely feline daughters. i am looking for friends and people more used to living with bipolar disorder than i am.


DIY Daily - Inspiring Wedding Vendors
DIY Daily aims to expose various kinds of wedding vendors that carry their respective concepts and expertise. Some existing vendors such as Moreno, AXIOO Photografi, Donny Liem Make Up, Mulia Hotel, Tirtha Bali, Ayana Resort and others.
These vendors are experts in the fields of decoration, flowers, jewelry, wedding dresses, wedding conceptors, buildings that rent places for wedding celebrations, wedding organizers, photographers, makeup artists, and others.
DIY Daily has an important role in facilitating, providing choices and bringing together couples who will marry with the right wedding vendor, so that the couple can create and realize what the desired marriage is like. Discover is that most couples use Pinterest to make their dream wedding pinboard and show it to the wedding vendor.


As a submissive, or even as a woman in a relationship, i have the right to speak up and discuss what my needs are... and my wants... I trust my Master to hear those needs and wants and to know the difference. If there is a *need* that He can't provide, we talk about it... and decide how important that need is and if im to be allowed to satify that need at that time (so far there hasn't been any He can't provide). The wants are absolutely at His discretion, and He knows it, but it is a way to let Him know where i'm at. A Dominant is expected to tell their submissive what they need and expect, and yet often i see submissives told they are 'topping from the bottom' if they try and return the favour... Perhaps some Dominants are threatened by this behavior.i don't really know...i do know that our relationship is still a relationship and our marriage is like any other marriage. We have to come together as two people who love each other first and make sure we are both feeling fulfilled. That is critical no matter what kind of relationship it is, and just like any other relationship, COMMUNICATION is key.Although... i must say... that when it's little cravings, sometimes just displaying my submission to Him openly and genuinely is all that's needed!


Are We a Bunch of Overprotective Sentimentalists? (and a case for Biblical love)
The men in our church are studying 1st John. A short letter written by one of Jesus’ closest disciples, John. Much of the themes in the book are centered on love.
John writes about loving God and enjoying fellowship with our Maker and Redeemer. And he writes about love for the church, and our neighbors. But what is love? How does the biblical sense of love differ from our cultural understanding? Are they the same or different?
I find this Frederick Buechner quote helpful:
“In the Christian sense, love is not primarily an emotion, but an act of the will. When Jesus tells us to love our neighbors, he is not telling us to love them in the sense of responding to them with a cozy emotional feeling. You can as easily produce a cozy emotional feeling on demand as you can a yawn or a sneeze. On the contrary, he is telling us to love our neighbors in the sense of being willing to work for their well-being even if it means sacrificing our own well-being to that end, even if it means sometimes just leaving them alone. Thus in Jesus' terms, we can love our neighbors without necessarily liking them. In fact liking them may stand in the way of loving them by making us overprotective sentimentalists instead of reasonably honest friends.” --Originally published in Wishful Thinking and later in Beyond Words
Love in the biblical sense is not cozy and sentimental. It’s not primarily a feeling but an act of the will. Love more often than not will include feelings. But feelings are not the primary driver of love.
John in his short letter didn’t say if we love God we’ll have strong feelings for him. No, he said, if we love God we’ll express it by obedience and doing what he says, and loving our neighbors:
“3 And by this we know that we have come to know him, if we keep his commandments. 4 Whoever says “I know him” but does not keep his commandments is a liar, and the truth is not in him, 5 but whoever keeps his word, in him truly the love of God is perfected. By this we may know that we are in him…” -1 John 2:3-5
To say we love someone and dismiss everything they say is indifference. It’s an arrangement. If I say I love my wife, and never listen to her opinions, or pleas to put up the toilet seat and take out the trash. That’s not love. Love involves acts of the will and expression.
Love involves sacrifice and commitment to another for their benefit. With God, we can’t add to Him, or make him more worthy by our love. But with neighbors, we show love by actions, and considering their needs more vital than our own.
Jesus modeled this for us in the greatest act of love in the history of the world.
“16 By this we know love, that he laid down his life for us, and we ought to lay down our lives for the brothers. 17 But if anyone has the world's goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God's love abide in him? 18 Little children, let us not love in word or talk but in deed and in truth.” -1 John 3:16-18
Jesus laid his life down unto death. He sacrificed for his enemies. Did he feel love in this act of redemption? Sure.
But the act of love showed on the cross was not for sentimental reasons. It was not an act of heroic love for the sake of illustration and example alone. The action of Jesus accomplished something. Mainly, redemption of sinners for all who trust in Him. The atoning work of Jesus made fellowship with God possible.
We could say: Jesus didn’t just say he loved the world, he showed it. He gave his own life for her redemption and restoration.
As much as our culture spouts out the need for loving all people. I think most of what we’re talking about is a form of tolerance and what Buechner describes as: “overprotective sentimentalists.”
What our society needs is a reimagining of love. Not a sentimental and tolerant love which only puts up with others to a point. Our culture needs a kind of love with backbone and heart and action. A love rooted in service, commitment, and sacrifice.
I think only the biblical version of love can create a people who consider the needs of others more important than their own. Only the biblical sense of love with a crucified Messiah at the center has the weight to compel someone to consider loving others, the way Jesus has loved them.
The church needs to be a community of Light where they not only say they love God, but demonstrate love by listening to what their Father tells them, and includes loving their neighbors as themselves.
I’m enjoying this study in John, because it’s much easier for me to love in “word or talk” and not “deed and truth.”
Consider me challenged…


In October of 2001, the prettiest girl on my college campus, a popular upperclassman, agreed to go on a date with me, a nerdy freshman.
That following February, she agreed to marry me.
Yes, it was quick and this sort of relationship often crumbles as quickly as it starts. But after 12 years of marriage, I still tell everyone that taking my wife “off the market” was one of the smartest decisions I’ve ever made.
The things that made the wooing process so fast and the ensuing relationship so successful work equally well in my approach to attracting leads and winning customers (taking them “off the market”): singularity of focus, clarity of purpose, selfless commitment to providing value, trustworthiness and reliability.
The Dating Game
When I was 19-years old, I was different than most of my peers. I wasn’t in a rush to jump the broom, but I wasn’t interested in casual dating, either. I was going to treat my girlfriend as my potential future wife. Never did I imagine my life would change so rapidly, but the point is clear: if you’re serious about who you date and why, you’ll move towards wedding bells quicker than those who are “playing the field.”
You have to know who you want as potential customers and why. You wouldn’t just date anyone, and you don’t want just anyone as your customer. Who is your target market? What kind of prospect is a good fit for you and your business?
Read the rest of this article in the February issue of Evolution Magazine, (it’s the Guest Editorial on page 9).
(The Beat Goliath System is my prescribed strategy for attracting date-worthy leads and turning them into wife-able customers and clients. Find out more by entering your name and email address in the box to the right. )


Curt's, grandmother passed away on Oct 8th, 2008. We had the Viewing and Funeral this last weekend. It was nice to be with the whole family to celebrate her life. She was a strong woman that loved to play the organ, and she was really good at it too. She had a hard life, but always pushed through them with her faith. I never got to meet her husband Charles but she would tell me stories of there experinces every time we went over to her house. I know that Grandma Schenk had a wonderful reunion with Charles, finally! Curt and I are glad that we had the opportunity to know her and had the chance to have our kids know her too.


If you are not so lucky in love, or are just too busy to socialize in order to find your soul mate, all is not lost! No doubt that you have heard of online dating, or maybe you or a friend has tried it in the past? Well, the good news is that an increasing number of singles are finding love and friendship through single dating websites.
Single dating is exactly that – matching two compatible single people for friendship, love or companionship 聊天室. There are many dating websites for every type of person, no matter what your age, sexuality, gender, location or race. Most of these single online dating websites have hundreds of thousands or millions of registered users that are also looking for the same thing as you – love and friendship. It is the fact that so many singles are turning to the Internet to give online dating a chance that the growing number of users online gives everybody an increasingly higher chance of finding that special person, simply as there are so many people doing the same thing.
If you have not tried single dating, there has never been a better time to try it than now. It is not only the sheer number of other singles that make it an appealing prospect but the advanced features and benefits that members now receive from the online dating websites themselves 相睇公司. In recent years, advancements in online technology has made it easier than ever to help determine whether a particular person is a good match for you. Some examples of these include real time video chats; instant messaging and complicated and advanced search algorithms that help match people by using various data such as hobbies, interests, religion and beliefs.
You can act anonymously if you prefer or upload all of your details and profile for everyone to view speed dating 收費. There are special online dating websites for singles as well as more broad online dating websites. Specialist single online dating may be geared towards a certain age or sexuality for example. However you should be aware that as most specialist sites cater for certain types of individuals, they may have less members compared to more general dating websites. The benefit of course is that you are joining a site with specialist requirements that interest you.
If you are looking for love and have not been so lucky so far, why not try an internet dating website? Many singles are finding love this way and it is easier than you may think. Also most single online dating sites offer free trials so there is no commitment on your behalf.
There are a lot of dating sites to choose from. It is a good idea to start with a a review site that will compare online dating services [http://www.bestonlinedatingagencies.com] and provide you some good information about the pros and cons of each service. A site like this will have already reviewed the best online dating agencies. This will free you up to spend your time finding that someone special.


So, sadly but somewhat amusingly, the relationship that I spoke of in my last entry is now over and done with. It was pretty sudden, but everything about that relationship was a clusterfuck of confusion and jumping the gun and being overly impulsive, but.. happy. For a minute.
A friend of mine (big time blogger Dan Pearce at danoah.com) once wrote a blog about how time is a relationship's friend. I will paraphrase it badly, but basically the gist of it was, we get so scared of things not working and WANT this happiness so badly that we force it, we jump too fast, we figure if we can lock things down sooner, then better, because then we're.. um. Trapped.
Yeah, trapped.. doesn't sound so good now, does it?
But the thing I've learned about life is that you're never trapped. If something isn't working, you can either try to fix it or you can let it go. If it isn't fixable you better let it go, or you're gonna be really unhappy.
When you have two people involved in the "will it work?" equation, then both have to be totally on board if you want to try to fix it. Obviously.
Or it should be obvious, but again, I've learned that people (ME) are silly and .. will try for ages to carry a relationship on their hope and love alone, when the other person has a foot or even both feet out the door.
In most of my relationships, one or both of us have had a foot out the door in some way. Maybe we didn't want to admit it to even ourselves, but we did.
I did it with my first long-term relationship.
The one after that, the other guy did it, in a huge way. And got me pregnant, and then had two feet out the door, running. And that was the beginning of me learning how to be dysfunctional in a relationship. How to have a backup plan at all times. How to assume that when a man looked me in the eyes and said he loved me, that was probably lying to get laid.
So, this time, I started the relationship with a foot out the door. And he started it without an ounce of trust. So the damage was done before anything got done... And we both just made it worse, day by day, meanwhile trying so hard to love each other and make it work.
We are both good people. We both really cared about each other. We both really wanted it to work.
But two good people do not a great relationship make, and here we are.
We lied to each other.. he went behind my back. He invaded my privacy, I broke his trust. He did things that put my family's finances in jeopardy, he lied when he told me everything was okay... he broke my trust too. The day I was ready to get my foot out of that door and be all in, he did some things that proved to me that WE would never be okay again.
I was so scared to let that relationship go, even though it was a weight on my shoulders.. always being watched, always being judged, never being good enough. I was scared because for the first time in years I felt like I was LOVED. I felt stronger because of it.. I got more done in that month than I've gotten done in a year. I was motivated and... mostly happy.
But I was sad, too. I cried at night after he fell asleep. We fought because he made me feel inferior, because HE was insecure.
We were the perfect mirrors for each other to see our own ugliness, magnify it in the other person and hurt each other, all in the name of "happiness".
The thing is... I'm not upset.
I'm a little sad, and I will be for a while, but this time, I KNEW when it was time to let go. And I just did it. Cut the ties and walked away and kept walking, and amazingly, instead of walking back into the arms of someone from my past like usual, I'm just walking ahead. Alone. And it's okay.
For the first time, I feel like I can do this. And I don't need to be loved my anyone but me and my kids. And we're okay.
We are okay.
I'm redefining my happiness, and it's kind of cool. I love learning lessons... I love finding out how strong I am. Even when it hurts.
I don't like this sunburn, I could go without that, but at least I won't forget sunscreen again. Like, ever. Ever.
And if there's another relationship in the future, I'm either putting both feet in or none at all, cause that's the only way to do life. All in.
Now if I could just get my house put back together.. I will be sleeping on the couch for a while. :-p


Chat video and voice sex who is adelaide kane dating
We know what it's like to feel that romance, kinkyness and sexual excitement that you can feel when meeting online.Sexy Ads adult personal ads are for sexually active men, women and couples.Listen to the recordings, get a sense of the people you are listening to, contact, connect, chat, date… Or you might chose to take one step at the time, a gradual slow boil until the two of you are ready to go further. You know that she is looking for a relationship based on intimacy. And all of a sudden, you find yourself with a real choice in your hands. The truth is, there are dozens of websites out there offering adult chat rooms, adult chat, video chat and a variety of live sex cams. FOR STARTERS, THE WOMEN WHO RECORD MESSAGES ON OUR LINES ARE REAL!
We created Sexy Ads after meeting through adult personals on the net back in 1994.
Thank you for visiting us and we hope you'll take the big step to change your life.
I am going to let you in on a little secret: there is a hidden treasure out there, a little known gem that people in the know use all the time to get all the sex they want, and it’s called sex chat.
For us, it was time to take charge and create the life we wanted with someone who liked sex as much as we did. Take a moment and imagine how your life would be with someone sexy by your side.
There's no better place to start your search for sex, a long term relationship, online fun or adult dating. We believe that every relationship starts out all about that sexual connection that puts two horny adults together and nature takes over and it's naughty, erotic, sensual fun. Regardless of the type of relationship you're seeking, you could find it right away but it means you'll have to take that first step and come inside.


My father and I outside the gallery during my opening. It was great to have him there for the show. We have grown to be closer than we ever have, in my relationship with my father. He's more curious, relaxed, and interested in things outside his routine. We clashed quite a bit when I was a young man, and didn't often see each others logic, but that is the funny thing about time, all of that has changed. I consider him a friend now, and a wonderful father!
Love you Dad!


Email marketing terms can be confusing if you're new. Here's how to differentiate between some of the common lingo thrown around.
Email broadcasts are far more effective at creating a form of connection with your users. You should be treating these users as your friends and creating a long-term customer journey. In the long run you're going to see incredible results.
Email marketing is the most direct form of marketing. The goal of email marketing is to establish a relationship that will ultimately lead to a strong bond with your customer. Connect with your customers by sharing what you're passionate about to grow a loyal customer base.
Here are 7 email marketing KPIs you can investigate today to grow your business through email marketing
Hundreds of questions about email marketing are asked everyday on social media channels. Here are 5 questions we've noticed occur again and again.
The coronavirus will require you to shift your digital strategy. Although many businesses are experiencing a downturn in revenue, now's the time to adjust your marketing budget rather than axe it.
Despite recent regulations by the European Union to further regulate emails, email marketing is actually growing.


A Special Dinner
Buying that special someone a Birthday gift is sometimes a bit tricky, especially if there are not any hints given. Do you love giving that perfect gift? There are a couple simple surprises that always work. Cook their favorite meal, who doesn’t want to eat a favorite meal on their Birthday.
A Weekend Away
Take a surprise away to a special place to share a wonderful time together. Fun in the Sun on the beach, sailing the seas, time in a cabin in the woods, makes a great weekend for time together celebrating that special day.
A Treasure -- Boudoir Album of You
Birthday Surprise that last a lifetime. Make the surprise out of the ordinary and shop for that surprise for yourself. What did you just say? Yes, that’s correct start shopping for some sexy lingerie and schedule that Boudoir Shoot and selection of your album book. Give that special someone their gift that is an absolute surprise of a Boudoir Album of who YOU! Your album may be sexy and seductive, cozy, casual, or a combination, even themed about that birthday message in that beautiful birthday suite. 😊 The decision is yours and spending time together is what really matters, enjoying your surprise and being spoiled in that special way you do.


After 20 years in the United States, a Hungarian neurosurgeon returns to Budapest for a romantic rendezvous with a fellow doctor she met at a conference. When the love of her life is nowhere to be seen, she tracks him down only to have the bewildered man claim the two have never met.
DIRECTED BYLili Horvát
PRODUCED BYDóra Csernátony, Lili Horvát, Péter Miskolczi
CASTNatasa Stork, Viktor Bodó, Benett Vilmányi, Zsolt Nagy, Péter Tóth, Andor Lukáts, Attila Mokos


Can Couples Who Are Gay or Lesbian Migrate Together to Australia? Now that same-sex marriages are recognised under Australian law, it is possible to apply for a partner visa on the basis of marriage. Under the Marriage Act, a notice of 30 days must be given before a marriage can take place in Australia.
Now that the Marriage Act has been amended it has opened up a new application pathway for same-sex couples. Also, a number of additional immigration options will now make it simpler to add partners as secondary dependents.
The regulation defining Interdependency says you must have been in a “relationship” for a period of 12 months immediately preceding the date of application. This “relationship” includes financial, legal, social and domestic criteria and includes living together Or, “not living separately and apart on a permanent basis”.
The Interdependency Visa Category
There is only one category of visa available to the same-sex partner of an Australian permanent resident or citizen the Interdependency visa category. The Interdependency visa is similar to the Spouse visa available to an opposite-sex partner of an Australian resident or citizen. However, it may be more expensive to apply for the Interdependency visa in some circumstances.
The 457 Visa
There is also only one category of visa which allows a same-sex partner of a primary visa applicant to accompany them to migrate to Australia. It’s the Temporary Business 457 visa. This compares to the myriad of visas available to an opposite-sex couple wishing to migrate to Australia together. The result is that each member of a same-sex couple may have to qualify separately for a visa. If one is not successful, the couple will be separated across the world.
Same-sex Partner Does Not Qualify as a ‘spouse’
Same-sex couples are denied access to the range of visas available to opposite-sex couples. And this is because a same-sex partner does not qualify as a ‘spouse’ and is therefore not a ‘member of the family unit’ in the Migration Regulations 1994. Since a same-sex partner cannot be a ‘spouse’, he or she will not qualify for a Spouse visa or a Prospective Marriage visa.
The Interdependency visa is the only visa that is available for a person who is a same-sex partner of another person. A same-sex partner of a person cannot be included as a member of the family unit on a visa application. And this is the case even if the same-sex couple has been married according to the laws of another country. Under Australian law, only opposite-sex relationships can constitute a spouse relationship.
The Migration Regulations define an ‘interdependent relationship’ to be a relationship between any two people where:
- There is a mutual commitment to a shared life
- The relationship is genuine and continuing
- They live together
Thus, a same-sex partner can be a member of an ‘interdependent relationship’.


Do you ever feel like you're hated? Like nobody cares about you or your life? I do. I am especially underappreciated by my family EVERY. SINGLE. DAY. The only one who seems to actually care about me is my mom, and that's only occasionally. I never get to have fun or hangout with friends. Then again, I don't have any REAL friends. I always have to deal with this crap every day. But then there's those few - and I mean FEW - people who actually bother to listen to me and make me feel better. It doesn't work much, and I can't ever really see them because my parents disapprove of me doing anything I want that they don't even like at all or know about. But I know they're there, and that I won't always be alone. Well, that's all for now. See you all in the next entry!


Are you struggling to stay connected with your family in today’s fast-paced world? We understand the challenges of juggling work, school, and other commitments while trying to maintain strong relationships with our loved ones.
staying connected with family insights is unquestionably useful to know, many guides online will fake you roughly staying connected with family insights, however i recommend you checking this staying connected with family insights . I used this a couple of months ago following i was searching on google for staying connected with family insights
That’s why we’re here to demystify the art of staying connected with family. In this article, we’ll share practical tips and innovative ideas to help you prioritize quality time together, utilize technology effectively, plan family gatherings or reunions, share hobbies and interests, and communicate openly and honestly.
Demystifying Staying Connected With Family is entirely useful to know, many guides online will performance you more or less Demystifying Staying Connected With Family, however i suggest you checking this Demystifying Staying Connected With Family . I used this a couple of months ago past i was searching upon google for Demystifying Staying Connected With Family
Get ready to strengthen those familial bonds like never before!
Prioritize Quality Time Together
Let’s make sure we prioritize quality time together as a family. In today’s fast-paced world, it can be challenging to find moments to connect with our loved ones amidst our busy schedules. However, by intentionally scheduling activities and creating traditions, we can ensure that we carve out valuable time for each other.
Scheduling activities is essential in fostering strong family bonds. Whether it’s planning a weekly game night or setting aside a day for outdoor adventures, these planned events provide opportunities for us to engage with one another on a deeper level. By committing to these activities, we show our family members that they are a priority in our lives.
Creating traditions is another powerful way to strengthen family ties. Traditions offer stability and serve as anchors in the ever-changing world around us. They give us something to look forward to and create lasting memories that will be cherished for years to come. It could be something as simple as Sunday brunch together or an annual vacation destination that becomes synonymous with family time.
By prioritizing quality time through scheduling activities and creating traditions, we foster a sense of belonging and closeness within our families. These intentional actions help us build stronger connections with one another and create lasting bonds based on shared experiences.
As we explore ways to demystify staying connected with our families further, let’s also consider how technology can play a role in bridging any physical distance between us all without diminishing the importance of face-to-face interactions or becoming overly reliant on digital communication tools.
Utilize Technology to Stay in Touch
Using technology is a great way to stay in touch with loved ones. In today’s fast-paced world, virtual gatherings and online activities have become essential tools for maintaining connections with family members, no matter the distance. Imagine sitting in your living room, surrounded by your loved ones, even though they may be miles away. With just a few clicks, you can join a video call and share laughter and stories as if you were all physically together.
In this digital age, technology offers us endless possibilities to engage in meaningful activities with our family members. Through online platforms, we can plan virtual game nights where everyone can participate from their own homes. Picture the excitement of playing charades or trivia games while seeing the smiles on each other’s faces through the screen. Additionally, virtual cooking classes or DIY projects can bring families closer together as they learn new skills and create memories collectively.
By utilizing technology for staying connected with family, we not only bridge geographical gaps but also foster a sense of togetherness despite being physically apart. These online interactions provide opportunities for bonding and sharing experiences that would otherwise be missed out on due to distance or time constraints.
As we explore various ways to maintain strong connections with our loved ones using technology, it is important to also plan regular family gatherings or reunions where everyone can come together physically.
Plan Regular Family Gatherings or Reunions
In this digital age, technology offers us endless possibilities to engage in meaningful activities with our loved ones. However, there’s something magical about gathering together as a family and creating traditions that will be cherished for years to come.
Planning regular family gatherings or reunions is an excellent way to strengthen bonds, create lasting memories, and foster a sense of belonging.
When it comes to creating traditions, the options are limitless. You can have an annual family picnic at the park, organize a yearly game night filled with laughter and friendly competition, or even establish a special holiday tradition unique to your family. These rituals not only bring everyone together but also provide an opportunity for each member to contribute their ideas and creativity.
Another exciting way to stay connected as a family is by traveling together. Exploring new places and experiencing different cultures can be incredibly enriching for both young and old alike. Whether it’s a weekend getaway or an extended vacation, traveling together allows you to bond over shared experiences while creating lifelong memories.
Discover activities that ignite your passion and bring you closer together as a family by sharing hobbies and interests. Engaging in joint projects and pursuing common passions can create a strong bond within the family unit.
Whether it’s painting, gardening, cooking, or playing an instrument, finding shared activities allows each member to express their creativity while fostering collaboration.
By embarking on joint projects, you not only spend quality time together but also learn from one another. Each individual brings their unique perspective and skills to the table, leading to innovation and growth. Working towards a common goal strengthens communication and problem-solving skills as you navigate through obstacles together.
Finding common passions can be an exciting journey of self-discovery for both parents and children. Encouraging everyone in the family to explore their interests provides an opportunity for personal growth while deepening the understanding of one another’s passions. This mutual support fosters empathy and creates a safe space for open expression.
As we dive into the importance of staying connected with our loved ones, it is crucial to communicate openly and honestly about our thoughts, feelings, and desires without fear of judgment or rejection. It is through this transparent communication that we build trust and strengthen our bonds even further.
Communicate Openly and Honestly
When we openly express our thoughts and feelings, we create a safe and trusting environment for honest communication within our family. Effective communication is the foundation of any healthy relationship, and it plays an even more crucial role in building trust within families. By openly sharing our thoughts and emotions with one another, we foster understanding, empathy, and connection.
In order to communicate effectively, it’s important to listen actively to one another. This means giving our full attention when someone is speaking and truly trying to understand their perspective. It also involves expressing ourselves honestly and respectfully, using ‘I’ statements instead of blaming or criticizing others.
Creating a safe space for open communication requires vulnerability from all family members. We must be willing to share not only our successes but also our struggles, fears, and insecurities. By doing so, we show each other that it’s okay to be imperfect and that we can support one another through life’s challenges.
Building trust through open communication takes time and effort. It requires us to be patient with one another as we navigate difficult conversations or disagreements. However, the rewards are immense – stronger relationships filled with love, understanding, and growth.
So let’s make a conscious effort to communicate openly and honestly within our families. Let’s create an environment where everyone feels heard, valued, and respected. Together, we can build trusting relationships that stand the test of time.
In conclusion, staying connected with family may sometimes feel like a challenge, but it’s definitely worth the effort. By prioritizing quality time together, utilizing technology to stay in touch, and planning regular gatherings or reunions, we can strengthen our bond with our loved ones.
Additionally, sharing hobbies and interests can be a great way to connect with family members. Whether it’s cooking together, playing sports, or engaging in a shared hobby, these activities can create lasting memories and deepen our relationships.
Furthermore, communication is key in maintaining strong family connections. By communicating openly and honestly, we can address any issues or concerns that may arise and ensure that everyone feels heard and understood.
In the end, family is a source of comfort, love, and support. It’s important to put in the effort to stay connected and nurture those relationships. No matter the distance or circumstances, family will always be there for us.
Let’s remember the importance of staying connected with our family and make it a priority in our lives.
Thanks for reading, for more updates and articles about Demystifying Staying Connected With Family don’t miss our homepage – Coteau Haven We try to write the blog bi-weekly


Celebrate Valentine's Day at our restaurant Maria
With Valentine’s Day right around the corner, we couldn’t be more excited about the upcoming celebration of love. We know that one of the biggest parts about a successful Valentine’s Day is the right meal. If you are worried about finding the perfect spot for your romantic night out, then we have you covered!
On February 14, we invite you to immerse yourself in a unique romantic atmosphere and to treat yourself and a loved one with an unforgettable dinner at our restaurant Maria! We have prepared a special menu to complement the exciting emotions on Valentine’s Day. Welcome!
For more information and reservations call us at: +1 829 961 4455


Updated: Dec 8, 2021
Growing up in the New Media Age, relationships were almost always painted as one of two ways: A fairytale or a burden. Some creative twists include relationships being a fairytale until they become a burden; or being a burden until they become a fairytale. I mean just think about how Edward and Giselle started out in Disney's Enchanted...
I don't think this narrative is unique to the current generation. It is even noted in one of the Biblical wisdom literatures that there is nothing new under the sun (Ecclesiastes 1:9). However, while the fairytale vs. burden love story might not be new, it's certainly much more easily spread because of modern media. But is it even true?
To many people, life starts when they find “The One.” The general public probably doesn't actually fantasize about getting swept up on a white horse by a prince or putting the perfectly fitted glass slipper onto a princess. But we do dream about finding someone and "starting our life." We might picture it to be something like this: I will find someone attractive and dreamy. We will instantly click but decide to "take it slow." We won't fight much, and if we do, we will easily move past it. We will only have kids exactly when we want. He will be funny. She will have a cute laugh. We will go to the gym together. She will be an amazing cook. He will be good with kids. We will live in a nice apartment with a little puppy. We will hold all the same theological beliefs. Even if the other person has made mistakes in their past, they would never make a mistake again because I have changed them with my love. Love is all about being happy with my perfect match. People on Instagram are going to love us. And so on...
What do these expectations really say about the heart? Is this a good foundation to "start a life" on? We are here to confirm that expectations can be a good thing. They help create boundaries and good soil for your relationship to grow. But some expectations are usually rooted in lies and can be very damaging. Many of these mis-directed expectations are grown out of the core belief that "I deserve..." or "If only they..." These two core beliefs are both passive and selfish. They completely rely on what the other person does or doesn't do. It seems that these two types of outlooks on relationships can be summed up with the expectation that marriage makes us happy. There's this idea that our partner is supposed to check all the boxes and cater to our needs or vice-versa. When the happiness expectation isn't met, the fault of one spouse becomes the project or downfall of the other. These two core thoughts are what put people into the mindset of either a fairytale love or a burdensome love.
If you think your relationship is all about what the other person should or shouldn't do, you might be in burdensome love. You will find yourself thinking that, "If only they didn't do this, we wouldn't be getting a divorce." If only they would start doing more chores, if only they would stop getting angry, if only they had never watched porn, if only they did their devotions more, if only they liked my parents, if only they initiated sex more, if only they, if only they, if only... These are the thoughts of someone that views love as a burden. Burdensome lovers see their partner as someone they need to fix. If they don't "change", then it's either out the door with divorce or continuing "marriage" but only as roommates with built-up resentment.
If you think your relationship is all about what the other person could do for you, you might be in fairytale love. You might find yourself thinking that you deserve things like a particular type of engagement ring, a vacation of your choice, or a partner that completely understands your every need without any actual communication. You might feel like you deserve your partner to go above and beyond for you. Some expectations might look like: "I deserve someone that has a better relationship with God than me so I don't have to try as hard." "I deserve someone who is in good physical shape." "I deserve someone who will think about me all day long and text/ call back right away." "I deserve someone who has a perfectly clean history." "I deserve someone who only talks to me in a way that makes me feel like a king/queen." The fairytale lover relies on the perfection of their partner to fill in the gaps of their own personal lacking.
So if marriage isn't burdensome love and it's not fairytale love, what is it?
Well, what we've discovered is maybe marriage isn't about spouses fixing each other at all! What if the design of marriage holds up a mirror and shows us what we look like as individuals? This mirror exposes our faults, growing us closer to our Heavenly Father. It also exposes the goodness that we are doing which encourages us on our journey. Looking at my spouse, I can clearly see the deeper parts of me that I wasn't able to see so well before. In the same sense that marriage is like a mirror, marriage is also like a tough coach in your life. It pushes you to your limits and encourages you to keep running through hard times. It gives you a practical space allowing you to rely solely on Christ for support.
We want to be very clear that marriage is fun! Marriage is living with your best friend. Marriage brings a lot of good times. But marriage isn’t everything. I, Bethany, went into marriage thinking that all my prayers and dreams had been answered; which is partly true. But Josiah and I are not perfect people. As surprising as it is, neither of us could fulfill each others' expectations.
Josiah and I had one of the hardest first years of marriage. We struggled with our own sin issues and both brought a-lot of past hurts into our marriage that we were working through for months. We went back and forth between trying to fix each other and trying to rely on the other for them to fix us. We loaded our lives with lots of change all at once that we felt as if we were drowning. We were only getting to know each other while starting a new college in a new state, away from what's familiar. Then we found out after a month of marriage that we were expecting our daughter, Eden. In premarital counseling, they definitely advise against so much change all at once (at any point in your marriage). Although we didn't realize in the moment how much we were taking on together, something Josiah and I have definitely learned after our first year is that we need God to be #1 in our lives personally, and #1 in our marriage. We genuinely cannot go a day without having God be first in our lives. We aren't able to be a good spouse or parent unless we are praying, reading the Bible, and actively bringing Christ into our home.
Even though everyone talks about marriage being hard, we feel strongly that God wants us as Christians to step up and start modeling the goodness of marriage and the union it brings between a man, a woman, and God. It is a blessing when two people come together to become one. You aren't doing this on your own. Marriage is two people as individuals walking closely with God if they allow themselves to be open to what Christ is speaking. Our spouse was never supposed to be our perfect person. When they mess up (and they will!) it doesn't need to be the end of the world because Christ walks with us through the trial. When our spouse breaks a vow, it probably isn't because they hate you, but because there's a deeper heart issue between them and God. It helps to pray for a heart change and allow God to do His work in bringing us closer to Him (and we mean pray for a heart change in yourself while you pray for your spouse). Of course a broken vow also requires forgiveness and reconciliation with your spouse, because your covenant is between you, your spouse, and God. Overall, marriage is about making us better believers to live in close communion with God. Joy comes from a heart that is in right relationship with our Savior, not from our spouse.
For the people who have viewed their relationship as a burden... next time your spouse forgets to put the toilet paper in the right way, pray and ask God to reveal why it even bothers you so much and ask him to work in your heart. Maybe the issue is more serious than toilet paper, maybe there was a serious offense or even an addiction. Ask God how HE sees the situation and see if there's anything God wants to do in your heart during this time.
For the people who have viewed their relationship as a fairytale... next time you get frustrated with your spouse not doing something that you wouldn't or couldn't do, take a step back and ask God for a merciful heart and also ask where he might want to make you stronger.
I pray that we can always remember that sticking with our spouses through the hardships in their lives is so important. I ask God that we would be spouses that have ears open to listening to what you have to say about our own heart condition instead of just trying to fix our husband or wife.


Imagine having 2 dads, and then them divorcing and dating other men. Then you’d have 4 dads.
The amount of dad jokes…
"Hi hungry, I’m dad."
"Hi dad, I’m dad too!"
"Hi dad too, I’m dad three."
"Hi dad three, I’m dad."
What have you done
when the moon hits ur eye like a big pizza pie
[guesses correct password for old account] nice, ive hacked it
when my mom was 30ish, my dad took her to this garage band concert as a date and she really liked them so she bought a cd from them and talked to them for a few hours then promised to keep in touch with them and show everyone her cd, but later forgot. So 10 or so years later theyre on the radio and she just smacks her head then says, “fuck i forgot to show everyone the cd” and that is the story of how my mom let Adam Levine and the rest of Maroon 5 down.


As many people often wonder: ‘how it is like being in a relationship where you can only physically see each other every so often.’ We figured it would be a good idea to turn this topic into a video.
A long distance relationship shows genuine love. However, also challenges.. and so our first vlog came to be. We hope you enjoy!
Help grow our Community
Enjoyed this video? Let us know in the comments and share it with others you think that might find this interesting.
Any personal story? Simply let us know through social media.
Nos vemos apasionados 😉


Rog, I have a question for you concerning your relationship with Nancy Wilson while in the group heart did you ever feel, as Nancy has said that she just caved in to you or do you think she actually loved you, I know that you felt you loved her. Was it more of a convenience relationship? -Thresa B.
RF: Thanks for your question, Thresa.
There are many possibilities as to why she would make a statement like the one you referred to in your question.
I choose to believe that she loved me in a way, and continues to, but because of our inability to harmonize personally at the time, she knew we couldn’t be together. And I still hold very strong feelings for her that can never be diminished, no matter what. There are some things that are irreversible and permanent. I also have a special fondness for all the members of the original band. We went through an amazing evolution together and conquered a coveted prize, won by the collective consciousness of fantasy, belief, and determination.
The love we feel in previous relationships should be invulnerable to time and circumstance, otherwise, was it ever truly love?


My cousin Andrew has classical autism, an impairment that affects his social interactions and communication and includes some restrictive or repetitive behaviors. Andrew leads a normal life: he watches television, goes to school, and plays sports with his dad. Because of his social disability it is hard to understand what is going on in Andrew’s mind.
His mother, Mary, is bi-polar and has a hard time keeping a job, so they both live in her parents’ home. When observing their interactions with each other, their relationship seems awkward and less like mother and son. However, they have their own way of communicating, a special language, using hand gestures and inside jokes. This project helps me understand both my cousin and my aunt and how they live their lives together and sometimes alone.
Available for Purchase


Dating has become complicated for professionals who are busy. Long hours and long commutes make it all but impossible to meet other professionals in a purely social setting. If you survey couples today, around 15-20% of them will say they met their partner online through a dating site. It’s more common than ever. People are able to see the person’s photo and profile before they ever meet them, thus insuring that they are compatible.
Even though it’s called BlackGradDate.com, it is for everyone who wants to join. Their mission is to serve as the premier black dating site for professionals. The members of this site are looking for meaningful relationships. They have free dating tips on their blog and feature some of the members on the homepage. People on the site are free to write about themselves and express the kinds of people who interest them. This makes for better connections when someone does reach out to them.
If you are a shy professional, this dating site can be great for you as you navigate the dating world at your own pace. You can take your time. Email the people when you are ready and not feel the rush of a bar or club encounter. When you become a part of an online dating site you want to feel that it is ok to go at your own pace. Read more


With both parents schedule an increasingly busy and rarely have time together with family members, especially children. Holidays to
more exotic locations is a great way to have fun traveling with family members
Vacation trip with the family will also improve the relationship between parents and children are getting close. Of course not only to educate children, but also to spend quality time together as a family.
For example; go to the beach, the hills, flower gardens, lakes, museums, or visit to the cultural center and so on.
Our Highlight Family Trips:
Jakarta: Ragunan Zoo, Ancol Sea World, Safari Zoo, Situ Babakan, Botanical Garden, Tea Plantation, Bukit Berani.
Bandung: Ciater Hot Spring, Saung Angklung Udjo, Trans Studio Bandung, Bosscha Observatory, Geology Museum, Cihampelas Walk.
Jogjakarta: Water Castle, King Palace Jogjakarta, Museum Affandi, Rumah Tembi, Museum Ullen Sentalu, Gembiraloka Zoo.


Cupid is the Roman god of love. Legend has it that the person he shoots with his arrow will fall in love with the next person they see. This is often a problem, because Cupid’s arrow does not guarantee that the love is mutual; in fact it’s usually not. In your writer’s notebook, write a story in which something goes wrong with Cupid’s arrow. Maybe he shoots the wrong person by accident! Maybe he shoots the right person, but then the next person they see (who now they’re madly in love with), hates them! Use your imagination to come up with an entertaining, interesting, detailed story of a time when Cupid’s arrow went wrong.