Do modern mothers have too much information?
Here are the top tips on how to look after your mental health during the coronavirus pandemic. Okay, now be sure to hold your breath when Mummy flushes! I overheard from an adjacent public bathroom stall. When the toilet flushes, all of those germs and yuk gets puffed into the air and we do not want to breathe that in! Contemporary parents are quite possibly the most informed cohort this planet has ever seen. Sign up to our Kidspot newsletter for more stories like this  The research starts early. I dont at all embrace the, So what I turned out just fine, position. Its far too often used to defend blatantly bad parenting practices such as spanking and smoking while pregnant. Great, maybe we all lived through a few hits to rear-end, and yes technically we may have turned out just fine but that does not in any way excuse that kind of behaviour. In certain instances, we do know better and therefore actually must do better. However, while we may be highly informed mothers, I do think that in some instances, we have too much information. We are so keenly aware of every single possible, potential outcome or impact on the long-term development of our children, that it sometimes does not serve us well. When I think about my generation of women, our mothers didnt know half of what we have to process as mothers. Of course, I am glad we no longer put our babies on their bellies to sleep. I am glad we know better than to smoke or drink while pregnant. Yes, of course, Im glad the bars on baby cribs are no longer far enough apart for a babys head to get stuck in between. I am very happy that we have made actual progress in terms of keeping babies and mothers healthy and safe. Youve all heard the joke that mums in the 80s would simply send her children out into the streets to play while she sat inside and drank a Tab. Sure, its probably a slight exaggeration but there is some truth to it. Our mothers werent bogged down by the worry of exposure to certain things and how it would affect the development of our overall psyche. Keep in mind, I saw Stand by Me in the theatre the weekend it debuted. It was 1986. I was 12. Its rated R.  Our mothers probably werent worried about what happened on the playground at recess or how we were getting along with our friends. I know Im likely not alone when I say that we all experienced some level of mockery, teasing, and mild bullying that I never once shared with my parents. Today, many of us are so worried about our kids relationships that we intervene at every argument, fight, or sense of uncertainty and the worry is killing us. RELATED: The most difficult stage of motherhood is not what you think  In so many ways, we are victims of our own circumstance  We have 24/7 unlimited access. Articles about risk, what to do, and what not to do fill our news feeds constantly. Do this! Dont do that! It is almost impossible to shield ourselves from it. We have access to information that can be helpful, but can also cause unnecessary stress in public bathrooms. Some things, of course, we are better off knowing. Its important to know its best to keep babies rear-facing in cars until they are two. I think, its better to know that any item smaller than a toilet paper tube can cause choking. And while were at it, Id argue that anyone born after 1980 probably needs to know the warning signs of a stroke. For many of us, our parents are coming of that age. Yes, I know people who have no idea what a stoke looks like and honestly, its unsettling to realize that they are out in the world operating a street-legal vehicle. However, far too often than not, we are inundated with so much information that its almost impossible for us to process it effectively. So, allow me to indulge and make a suggestion  make fewer assumptions. The idea is simple. More often than not, when it comes to all of the information we have presented to us, and we have to make a decision, and the simplest solution is usually the best. The more assumptions we have to make  such as, toilet flushing is ultimately a health hazard  the more unlikely the rationale. In other words, stop overthinking. Its almost as though we have to become experts at filtering information. We still need to think, just think more simply. The greater mental leap we have to make, the more unlikely the risk actually is to us and our children. If nothing else, filtering out some of the noise will lessen the strain our contemporary parents brains. We really dont have to fear public toilets. Worse yet, we dont need to instill that fear in our children. I dont think we need to revert fully to 1983 and send our children outside to drink out of the hose. But I do think we can find a happy medium. I do think we can equip ourselves to be well-informed, yet sane parents. If its not helpful, filter it out. If I have to go down a scary rabbit hole to make it make sense, dont go. Take a detour. Its going to require us developing a new skill, but the more I think about it, its the perfect skill to pass down to our children. After all, they are going to have full access to all of this ridiculous amount of information, too. This post originally appeared on Filter free parents and has been republished here with permission. You can see more from Melanie on Facebookor her website.