Can we please stop treating women like heroes for going through labour without pain relief?
As a mother of three, who had every type of pain relief going during childbirth and three C-sections (one emergency, two elected), I find it patronising and frustrating to think that women need to be held up as heroes for experiencing pain. I remember when I had my first child, in 2009, and dutifully signed up the local NCT (National Childbirth Trust) classes, a ruinously expensive, middle-class gateway to meet other couples who happen to be having a baby at the same time and live in the same postcode. Our instructor, who proudly told us about how she delivered her first child in a birthing pool on her patio in Dulwich while her neighbours and cats looked on, strongly advised us against any form of pain relief, especially pethidine which she warned us could make our new babies so drowsy they wouldnt be able to breastfeed. Caesareans were glossed over with a fleeting worksheet, while birthing balls and tens machines (natural pain relief which helps sooth contractions with a mild electrical current) were heartily encouraged. Having a natural (aka excruciating and often deeply traumatic) labour is still held up as the pinnacle of female achievement and accomplishment. This sort of attitude probably goes some way to explaining the frequent misdiagnosis of debilitating conditions such as endometriosis (which an estimated one in 10 women have and which takes an average of eight years to be diagnosed, according to Endometriosis UK). To me, its just another example of the patronising and predominantly patriarchal view which still seems so prevalent in obstetrics and gynaecology. Admittedly there are some valid medical reasons why some pain relief procedures, such as epidurals, might not always be a good idea. Medics used to think that epidurals slowed down labour but recent studies have indicated this is not the case. They can, however, slightly increase your chances of having a medically managed labour, which means youre more likely to go on to have a C-section which involves a longer recovery. Maybe thats why so many friends have told me they were left begging for one during labour and denied the chance. Or maybe it was just because there werent enough anaesthetists on that shift to administer one. The fact is labour pain  like all pain  is subjective. Expecting us all to adhere to the same protocols or ideals during childbirth is inhumane, risky and unnecessary. And heroizing women for going through it without pain relief really doesnt help.