Is it time for the government to allow women to laugh a bit louder?
Is it time for the government to allow women to laugh a bit loudly?. Illustration: Ehsanur Raza Ronny  Despite numerous calls from the doctrine rights group, What Will Society Say (WWSS), women in the country continue to laugh too loudly to be considered modest. Osama Rahman. "In my family, religion is often cited to refrain me from raising my voice in any way or form. Girls are raised to be timid, feeble and agreeable," Maliha Mohsin, a writer and currently a graduate student of gender studies at Vienna, Austria, said. "The elder women in my family believe it themselves that women's voices should not travel outside the confines of the house. They believe that it attracts men or that people will speak badly about how loud the girls of the house are, which is considered equivalent to being disobedient and quarrelsome," she said, adding, "I believe that it's really a mix of patriarchal practice of religion and internalised misogyny that gives men the licence to be loud and assertive, while women are conditioned to be quiet and obedient." Would the fact that the policing begins at home make the state's intervention yet another useless endeavour. Tilottoma Jahan*, a young journalist, said, "At my in-laws place, girls are not allowed to laugh loudly. Because, religion teaches some that girls should not laugh loudly. I have heard this same from my monster-in-law. "I love whistling but because of this I have to hear how impolite I was. In fact, I was told that whistling for girls was forbidden. Whistling, singing or talking loudly  these are some of the things for which my in-laws think of me as a rude person," she said. When asked where this belief was coming from, Tilottoma said it was probably from the days of yore. "The belief is that girls need to be soft. So those things go against that," she said. Having failed to reach any member of WWSS, this correspondent spoke to an apparent representative of the organisation who shared its beliefs. "When a girl laughs loudly, they attract attention. The male gaze turns towards them and often these men are not allowed to be within the boundaries a woman needs to set for herself," Kamal Ahmed*, an official of a computer-parts retailer said. When asked about the need to lower the male gaze, he said that was a difficult thing and while he, personally, did lower his gaze, others may not be so quick to follow. Asked if the problem was just attracting attention, he said there were other things to consider. "A woman needs to be innocent. She needs to be soft-spoken and shouldn't come across as being dominant. That is the kind of woman you can make your wife," he said. Asked if he meant a child was worth making a bride more than a woman, given the characteristics mentioned, he laughed and said no. "But the younger the better. They are easier to teach the customs," he added, without batting an eye-lid. The religious nature of the issue isn't restricted to one doctrine. Most major belief-systems uphold the same structures of patriarchy and internalised misogyny. Thankfully, a progressive government can help erode some of these structures. Clearly, not us if the voting trends are to be believed.