Are Catholic weddings a means of evangelization?
Jeanne and Thibault took every effort to make their wedding guests feel at home. The couple's "big day" took place in March 2019 at a Mass in Lion-d'Angers in western France. But some of those who attended were quite distant from the Catholic Church, so Jeanne and Thibault designed booklets for the ceremony in which they personally welcomed their guests and sought to put them at ease. "Whether you come to Mass regularly or it is less usual for you, we wanted this Mass to be as welcoming as possible," they wrote. They also used the booklet to explain the meaning of their commitment. "Living with a love that goes beyond us, we wanted to place Christ at the heart of our union through this sacrament of marriage. It is for us the fruit of a long discernment and the beginning of a guided journey together towards holiness," they said in the pamphlet. An opportunity to share faith  "We were afraid of being too emotional to speak with the microphone, but we wanted to say why it was so important for us to get married in the church," the 27-year-olds recall. Like baptisms and funerals, weddings are among the only opportunities some non-practicing or even non-believing guests have to enter a church. This is why some practicing Catholics make their wedding Mass an opportunity to share their faith through the type of welcome, choice of songs, liturgical readings and explanation of the different stages of the Eucharist. "For us, it was an opportunity to dispel certain clichs about the Mass, show them how we live our faith and change their view of it," says Sixtine who got married to her husband Louis last May at a small ceremony attended by several people who were not believers. Marie and Guillaume are getting married next November. And they believe they have planned a Mass that will please everyone. Marie, who only recently became Catholic, discovered her faith through music. Involving people through the beauty of the celebration  And on her wedding day she wants to pass on her zeal to her atheist family in the same way: through the choir, violins and piano. She and her future husband want their wedding guests to be moved by the beauty of the celebration. "I know that our families will come to the Mass as spectators, but we want them to be involved, to enjoy it and to be carried away by the music," Marie insists. Many engaged couples try to use music to help make their non-Catholic guests feel part of the liturgy. "Some friends asked us to do the music at their wedding; they wanted the Mass to be the moment that everyone would remember," says Domitille, a young woman from Toulouse. The liturgy was simple and joyful. And the guests, many of who were atheists, were absolutely delighted. "People only talked about the Mass!" Domitille recalls. A few months later, she and some friends started Lv, a group of Catholic musicians who perform at weddings, baptisms and funerals. "It's about taking care of the rare occasions when people who are not accustomed to it come to church," she points out. Marriage prep  When Blandine and Edgar were preparing to marry in July 2020 many of their non-practicing friends and family wondered why the couple wanted a wedding Mass. "They asked us why we were getting married in church, being so young, if it was because everyone else was doing it, and so forth," they remember. "It forced us to ask ourselves the question, to explain the choice of a Christian marriage in a society for which it no longer makes much sense," explains Blandine. She recalls that she chose the passage from St. Paul's Letter to the Ephesians that says, "wives, be submissive to your husbands", as a way of challenging their wedding guests. "This reading spoke to us, and we thought it could be a way to start the discussion. During the reading, we were smiling and watching for reactions!" she says of that day. The idea worked. It sparked conversation on the meaning of the sacrament of matrimony. "It is always a beautiful moment to prepare a wedding with practicing fiancs, because the priest is not alone in his one-man show," says Pierre Protot, a priest of the Emmanuel community in the Diocese of Toulouse who helps prepare couples for marriage. "Some brides and grooms decide to wash each other's feet during Mass or lay a bouquet in front of a statue of the Virgin," he explains. But he points out that practicing Catholics actually make up a small minority of those who have church weddings. "Beyond the actual celebration, it is especially marriage preparation that offers an opportunity for evangelization!" he says.