What Does It Mean To Put Fit On A Dating-App Profile?
Ive been using dating apps consistently for the last five years, and in that time Ive noticed a lot of dubious trends; from the ubiquitous tiger selfies on Tinder to offers to watch the new L Word and chill on Lex. One of the most persistent ones, though, cant be contained to a single app. The use of the word fit to describe oneself or ones ideal partner is everywhere, particularly on more sex-focused apps like Pure and Feeld, and its always left me with a vague sense of discomfort. Of course, if running or yoga or mountain biking is a big part of your life, it makes sense that youd lead with it when trying to suss out if some random Internet stranger might be the one. The use of the word fit, though, has always felt to me less like a description of activity level than a kind of dog whistle meant to ward off, well...fat people. Or, in other words, people like me. Sure, but lets look at the facts: Dating while fat can be an incredibly fraught endeavor. Its easy to find someone to fetishize you, as Aubrey Gordon wrote in the 2021 Vox essay Such a Pretty Face, but finding someone whos actually going to love and respect youregardless of your sizecan be far trickier. A regular person using the word fit on a dating app isnt the same as a doctor refusing to treat a fat patient, but it can be rooted in a similar fear of the fat Other. When I open Tinder after a glass or two of wine and see women (and, often, couples) peppering their profiles with the word fit and endless gym selfies, I start to feel as though the casual sex and companionship that many people turn to dating apps for is off-limits to me until I lose half my body weight.