How to cultivate social relationships?
The basis of learning and social skills of a person begins in the first years of life, the family being the guiding axis and the school the secondary axis; we explain how to cultivate social relationships. It is from empathy and tolerance from which we can assimilate the diversity of ways of being and respect is implicit to be able to relate to others. In order to effectively develop the relationships we have with other individuals, keep in mind that the other person is an individual different from you. We must start from the fact that everyone has needs, interests, tastes, desires, motivations, among many other things, different from ourselves, says psychologist Paola Aragn Jaime. We tell you about the benefits of free time  The keys to how to cultivate social relationships  By understanding that a whole different world fits into individuality and thought, it will be easier for us not to give rise to assumptions, according to the graduate and masters degree in psychology from the Autonomous University of the State of Morelos. Were different  We usually evaluate everything from our particular way of interpreting the world. It happens that the links we establish are based on that predisposition that we have of someone, which is based on my own paradigm, but if I work on myself and understand that other people, near or far, are different, we are already building an alternative way of relate, adds the psychotherapist Edgardo Flores. We are complex  We must recognize the complexity of the other person, says the teacher in Family Sciences from the Higher Institute of Family Studies. I am influenced by a number of variables that have contributed to my way of being (my family environment, experiences, social relationships, schools where I have studied, books that I have read, movies, videos that I have enjoyed and a long etcetera). Understand that if I am someone complex, the other person is also complex . We long for the same  A third point that the specialist mentions and that emanates from Buddhist philosophies is that we are all the same because we share the same desire: to be happy and stop suffering. When I contact this deep longing that links me to someone, whether it is known or unknown, it leads us to be subtle, kind, assertive with words, says Flores. As adults we have created stereotypes that become limiting at the moment of the bond, but if we work on what unites us: the desire to be happy, I know that the other person does not want to suffer. Knowing that we share that deep down I no longer see a limitation. I can approach anyone, but not from the expectation, of expecting to receive attention or affection. There will be people who, due to their conditions, do not give us what we expect and that is where we feel frustration, disappointment, rejection and it leads us to believe that we do not have this ability to build ties or that the world is against us . The therapist emphasizes that we work on understanding, recognizing, accepting, validating the diversity of people, of ways of being, of expressions that will allow us to build respect, empathy, understanding, compassion, peace, kindness and many expressions that contribute to having better social relationships. There are emotional disabilities  Just as there are physical disabilities and we cannot make a person run with an inability to move in the lower extremities, I know it and I cannot get angry about it, or say if you want, you can, the same happens on an emotional and affective level There will be people who have some kind of disability in this area and it is not that they do not want to, they cannot , says Edgardo Flores. It indicates that the person would have to analyze whether they are in a position to establish a relationship with the individual or decide not to do so for the mental health of both and move away. Learn to say no  Historically and culturally we have difficulty saying no and setting limits for fear of offending or displeasing and more if it is about loved ones. This attitude has to do with a government system that was authoritarian that did not allow the free expression of citizens, it is also related to an authoritarian and inflexible upbringing at home, according to Aragn Jaime. Strategies can be developed such as stopping to think what I know you want to communicate, thinking how the other would feel if I say it the way I want to say it, how one would feel when listening to it, identify if it will be spoken from calm or from the impulse, in this second point is where most of the times offensive situations are communicated for the others . If we know ourselves, if we know how to manage our emotions from self-control and self-knowledge, he indicates, we will be able to find the words and moments to communicate with calm. A respectful upbringing  To relate effectively with the different members of society, you have to start with a parenting based on respect for the person, on being empathetic with what each member of the family is feeling, recommends the teacher in psychology. The specialist recommends that the childs space be respected; let you know that your opinion and existence is valued, and therefore important; work empathy with the other from the example of his own life; avoid authoritarian parenting, be flexible in decision making. And as parents reflect on what their fears are, their beliefs, their ways of relating to the world in order to understand why they are now reproducing it in parenting. You can work on personal growth in adult life to find out what are the difficulties and how you can help the person from the psychological aspect to achieve satisfactory relationships. Parents tend to focus on the intellectual and academic development of their children but Edgardo Flores considers that it is equally or more important that a child knows himself, that abilities, strengths, skills and impediments are identified in order to work on it. Another aspect in a more philosophical sense is that we are change, we are not the same person as yesterday and tomorrow we will be the same as today. Today we are the capacities, abilities, qualities, defects, virtues of today .