Sunday April 7th Service_transcript.txt

[0.00 --> 1.64]  There we go. Good morning.
[4.08 --> 7.08]  It is good to be with you this morning.
[8.56 --> 12.06]  And it is my joy to share with you the message this morning.
[13.38 --> 17.62]  As has been said, we are beginning a new series today on forgiveness.
[19.46 --> 25.14]  We did a series on fighting evil that we encounter in our lives.
[25.14 --> 36.02]  And we are and we were and are confronted by the truth that too often we succumb to that evil, to that sin.
[36.26 --> 38.54]  We fall into it, as we say.
[39.12 --> 41.32]  And sometimes we don't even know the wrong we do.
[42.78 --> 45.74]  And so we need forgiveness.
[46.52 --> 48.70]  And we need to forgive.
[50.44 --> 53.90]  Last week, Pastor Dave asked us about our mental picture of God.
[53.90 --> 56.86]  And yes, what do you think when we say the word God?
[57.02 --> 61.60]  And I'm sure like a number of you, for me, the first thing that comes to mind is grace.
[63.30 --> 65.86]  Scripture said, by grace you have been saved through faith.
[65.96 --> 67.06]  We read that last week.
[67.60 --> 73.38]  Grace implies a need to be forgiven and a need to forgive.
[74.38 --> 78.74]  Forgiveness is needed in the face of evil and brokenness.
[78.74 --> 81.62]  Maybe you have been betrayed.
[81.62 --> 81.84]  Maybe you have been betrayed.
[81.84 --> 81.86]  Maybe you have been betrayed.
[81.86 --> 82.36]  Maybe you have been betrayed.
[82.36 --> 89.96]  Maybe you have been lied to or you are living a lie.
[89.96 --> 95.10]  Maybe you are judgmental or you feel judged all the time.
[95.10 --> 102.00]  Maybe you look down on certain people or you feel absolutely useless and unworthy in yourself.
[102.00 --> 107.68]  You need forgiveness so badly.
[108.26 --> 111.94]  And you need to forgive so badly.
[113.50 --> 119.76]  Yet in our culture, there seems to be a different feeling expressed sometimes.
[120.56 --> 124.04]  Elizabeth Brennig in the New York Times wrote an article on forgiveness.
[124.04 --> 133.66]  And she says, we have a culture marked by an outraged sense of justice and a desire to make people atone for their sins.
[134.78 --> 141.16]  And it feels like we as a culture are offended by the very idea of forgiveness.
[142.58 --> 143.74]  Isn't that interesting?
[144.96 --> 151.24]  I think there's a sense that there's a fear that we let people get away with the stuff that they do when we forgive.
[151.24 --> 158.40]  And if you're in the wrong, according to the article, it will cancel you even if you're willing to change.
[160.06 --> 168.02]  Now forgiveness, when it's quick forgiveness, can be problematic because too often it doesn't include a sense of justice in there.
[168.66 --> 172.70]  But without forgiveness, reconciliation is not possible.
[173.42 --> 174.40]  It's not possible.
[175.18 --> 176.90]  Forgive as you've been forgiven.
[176.90 --> 182.48]  It recognizes that we all need forgiveness in order to see healing happen.
[185.24 --> 193.30]  Forgiveness is an essential to the relational fabric of our lives, our relationship with God, and our relationships with one another.
[194.18 --> 197.36]  And those who know this deeply build better relationships.
[197.64 --> 198.98]  That's just straight out true.
[198.98 --> 203.18]  Those who know how to forgive build better relationships.
[203.56 --> 206.70]  Because they stay humble knowing they need to be forgiven.
[207.04 --> 210.60]  And they know how to forgive because they know how to receive forgiveness.
[210.98 --> 212.92]  They go hand in hand.
[214.20 --> 216.32]  And so we're going to jump into this in this series here.
[216.84 --> 220.74]  I'm going to give you a lot to think about this morning, I think.
[221.36 --> 222.88]  Matthew 6, look at it with me.
[222.88 --> 223.88]  Matthew 6, verse 3.
[224.72 --> 225.54]  We're going to read.
[225.86 --> 227.72]  This is the Lord's Prayer here.
[228.62 --> 230.52]  And where we read, Jesus says,
[231.00 --> 233.90]  Forgive us our debts, our trespasses, our sins.
[234.32 --> 237.54]  As we also have forgiven our debtors.
[238.36 --> 238.74]  There we go.
[238.78 --> 239.96]  You see the combination there.
[240.62 --> 243.54]  And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from the evil one.
[243.78 --> 244.82]  And then Jesus goes on.
[245.08 --> 250.76]  For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you.
[250.76 --> 256.88]  But if you do not forgive others their sins, your Father will not forgive your sins.
[257.94 --> 262.42]  And that ought to make you stop in your tracks and say, what?
[262.66 --> 263.74]  What do you mean I don't get forgiven?
[264.16 --> 267.96]  If you don't forgive, you don't get forgiveness.
[268.94 --> 270.88]  I mean, that's a profound thing to say.
[270.96 --> 272.32]  That's something to wrestle with.
[272.74 --> 273.80]  So what does that look like?
[274.02 --> 278.18]  We're going to talk a little bit about this idea of what is forgiveness, what isn't forgiveness.
[278.18 --> 284.00]  And we're going to start off with a case study from the life of Jesus about this woman.
[284.94 --> 289.46]  There was a party at the house of Simon the Pharisee that Jesus was invited to.
[290.44 --> 294.26]  And this woman of bad reputation comes in.
[294.54 --> 296.12]  And she falls at Jesus' feet.
[296.26 --> 297.34]  And she weeps on his feet.
[297.46 --> 298.32]  Poured oils on his feet.
[298.66 --> 299.82]  And dries it with her hair.
[300.02 --> 302.06]  A profound picture.
[302.06 --> 304.52]  I want you to picture it.
[305.08 --> 307.86]  And then this is what happens next.
[308.44 --> 309.00]  Luke 7.
[309.10 --> 309.78]  Look at it with me.
[310.74 --> 316.80]  When the Pharisee, and that's Simon, who had invited Jesus saw this, this woman,
[317.54 --> 322.76]  he said to himself, if this man were a prophet, he would know who is touching him
[322.76 --> 325.80]  and what kind of woman she is, that she is a sinner.
[325.80 --> 332.14]  Jesus answered him, Simon, I have something to tell you.
[332.92 --> 334.42]  Tell me, teacher, he said.
[336.22 --> 339.32]  Two people owed money to a certain money lender.
[339.94 --> 342.42]  One owed 500 denarii, the other 50.
[342.80 --> 346.48]  Neither of them had the money to pay him back, so he forgave the debts of both.
[346.66 --> 349.50]  Now, which of them will love him more?
[350.56 --> 353.20]  Well, Simon replied, I suppose the one who had the bigger debt forgiven.
[353.20 --> 355.36]  Simon, you have judged correctly.
[356.02 --> 356.92]  And now you picture this.
[357.52 --> 359.52]  Then he's looking at this woman who's at his feet.
[360.78 --> 363.16]  And he's talking to Simon, but he's looking at her.
[363.24 --> 365.10]  He's pulling the attention toward her.
[365.96 --> 370.20]  Then he turned toward the woman and he said to Simon, do you see this woman?
[373.72 --> 375.00]  I came into your house.
[376.08 --> 379.20]  You didn't give me any water for my feet, which would have been customary.
[379.20 --> 384.22]  And she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair.
[385.58 --> 391.20]  You did not give me a kiss, which was also customary, but the woman from the time I entered has not stopped kissing my feet.
[391.40 --> 396.12]  You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet.
[396.38 --> 402.48]  Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven, as her great love has shown.
[402.48 --> 406.18]  But whoever has been forgiven little, loves little.
[408.40 --> 410.94]  And then Jesus said to the woman, your sins are forgiven.
[412.30 --> 416.48]  The other guests began to say amongst themselves, who is this that even forgives sins?
[417.14 --> 419.22]  And Jesus said to the woman, your faith has saved you.
[419.26 --> 419.80]  Go in peace.
[423.22 --> 425.00]  Who do you identify with in the story?
[426.88 --> 429.48]  Maybe several characters.
[430.38 --> 431.06]  I know I could.
[431.06 --> 436.66]  Simon, he's a religious leader, and he certainly doesn't put himself in the same place as this woman.
[437.78 --> 438.82]  What a sinner.
[439.28 --> 440.92]  And Jesus acknowledges her.
[441.04 --> 441.94]  He engages with her.
[441.98 --> 443.42]  He lets her touch him.
[443.64 --> 448.06]  And we have the religious leader's reaction to sin versus this clearly sinful woman.
[448.06 --> 455.94]  Or we might say we have one blind to his own sins versus one who knows her sins only too well.
[455.94 --> 460.46]  And only one of these people will be forgiven.
[460.66 --> 461.98]  Guess who?
[465.20 --> 468.46]  Forgive as you've been forgiven.
[469.28 --> 475.76]  But if you don't think you've been forgiven profoundly, you won't know how to forgive profoundly.
[475.76 --> 480.64]  Imagine the desperation that this woman felt.
[480.64 --> 485.86]  She went into the Pharisee's house knowing full well how they would think of her.
[485.86 --> 492.66]  But she went in with her sin, with her desperation, because she knew Jesus was there.
[492.66 --> 499.46]  Her tears flow in an act of desperation, an act of worship, because she knows grace is available.
[502.34 --> 509.14]  For those who have been forgiven much, well, there's great love and great grace available.
[509.14 --> 513.86]  But whoever has been forgiven little, loves little.
[514.04 --> 515.10]  Think about that.
[515.36 --> 517.52]  Whoever forgives little, loves little.
[517.76 --> 519.46]  Notice the combination here.
[520.34 --> 528.40]  And what we need to hear, if we think we can be like Simon, we need to see that we've been forgiven much.
[528.40 --> 537.34]  And we need to be made desperate so that we can be open to receiving the profound forgiveness that we actually need.
[539.14 --> 543.86]  Because that's where profound love comes from.
[544.02 --> 545.12]  Much love, as Jesus says.
[546.80 --> 549.66]  And I could hear the question from Simon, maybe others as well.
[549.84 --> 553.28]  Are you saying I'm as bad as that woman, that sinner?
[553.72 --> 555.24]  And the answer is yes.
[557.24 --> 557.68]  Yes.
[558.86 --> 561.58]  I'm always fascinated what Jesus does with some of the commands.
[561.82 --> 566.74]  You know, do not commit adultery, but I say to you, any man who looks lustfully commits adultery in his heart.
[566.90 --> 567.96]  What, are you saying I'm the same?
[567.96 --> 569.66]  I mean, yeah.
[571.46 --> 571.86]  Yeah.
[575.64 --> 579.70]  Scripture says all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
[579.94 --> 583.78]  I might add, all have profoundly sinned and fall short of the glory of God.
[584.88 --> 585.28]  All.
[585.98 --> 586.94]  Jesus died.
[587.28 --> 590.00]  Jesus died not because of your little bit of sinfulness.
[591.20 --> 592.42]  Oh, you know, I do these little sins.
[592.90 --> 594.34]  Jesus died for my little sins.
[594.34 --> 598.52]  Jesus died because you are a profound sinner.
[600.72 --> 603.68]  In desperate need of his grace.
[604.98 --> 607.04]  And there's no getting around that.
[607.04 --> 615.20]  He died because your sins were so deep, he had to die.
[616.56 --> 619.94]  When we read through the gospel, we see the centrality of forgiveness for everyone.
[621.02 --> 623.28]  Forgiveness is essential to our very lives.
[623.50 --> 627.32]  And if we don't see that, we can't receive it, and we won't know how to give it.
[627.32 --> 629.38]  It's all kind of a package deal here.
[629.94 --> 631.46]  Unforgiveness is death.
[631.46 --> 638.10]  It keeps us trapped in lies, in unawareness, in relational dysfunction, in self-centeredness.
[639.56 --> 644.10]  You need forgiveness, and you need to forgive.
[645.98 --> 646.72]  Both.
[647.52 --> 652.36]  You can't receive God's forgiveness without knowing the depths of your brokenness.
[652.36 --> 654.32]  And even then, you're probably still not there.
[654.98 --> 659.00]  And only then will you be able to forgive profound brokenness that harms you.
[661.44 --> 667.70]  In that honesty, we can then come to the Father, and then begin to love and forgive like Him.
[670.38 --> 674.12]  So, let me start off with some things that forgiveness isn't.
[675.46 --> 677.08]  Forgiveness isn't forgetting.
[678.46 --> 681.80]  Remember a number of years back, there was a really good book called Forgive and Forget.
[683.04 --> 685.22]  And I really like the book.
[685.48 --> 688.04]  But I don't think that happens.
[688.16 --> 689.58]  We are people who remember.
[690.46 --> 696.34]  Although, I caution you to not replace the word remember with rehearse.
[698.16 --> 703.72]  Sometimes, you know, we can have a sin, and then we rehearse what that person did, and we rehearse it, and we rehearse it,
[703.72 --> 708.06]  and then we feel the pain all over again, we rehearse it, and we rehearse it, and we just can never let it go then.
[708.84 --> 710.46]  You know, there's something wrong in there too.
[710.46 --> 713.18]  But we are going to remember.
[713.96 --> 720.26]  We are a people whose memories are there, and when they're deep and painful.
[720.26 --> 730.64]  You know, I had a young man come up to me after the service, in the first service, and he asked about that.
[730.78 --> 732.96]  He says, you know, aren't we supposed to forget?
[732.96 --> 738.90]  And I said to him, you know, I said, well, what if I punched you in the face now?
[741.80 --> 742.66]  And he, what?
[743.28 --> 750.74]  I said, well, if I punched you in the face right now, and then I asked you to forgive me, and would you?
[750.74 --> 754.08]  And he said, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I would.
[754.52 --> 755.62]  I said, would you forget?
[755.84 --> 756.20]  No.
[757.74 --> 758.08]  No.
[758.16 --> 760.02]  I said, that's kind of how this goes here, right?
[761.70 --> 763.56]  Something profound happens to you.
[763.88 --> 765.28]  You're going to remember it.
[767.86 --> 768.80]  You're going to remember that.
[768.80 --> 770.96]  But, you know, so forgive and forget, right?
[771.04 --> 774.92]  The memory is part of the pain of forgiveness.
[776.08 --> 783.20]  The couple who have to live with the deep pain of betrayal don't forget the betrayal.
[785.40 --> 786.30]  How could they?
[786.30 --> 792.22]  But they learn to love again with the pain.
[794.22 --> 795.16]  With the pain.
[798.92 --> 800.86]  You know, we say things in weddings, right?
[801.74 --> 805.32]  In sickness and health, you know, and all the stuff in our vows.
[805.78 --> 807.40]  You know, for better, for worse.
[808.14 --> 810.36]  Except we're not expecting worse, are we?
[811.94 --> 813.38]  Until it shows up.
[813.74 --> 815.68]  And now we have to figure that out.
[816.30 --> 817.68]  And what do we do with all that?
[818.58 --> 818.74]  Right?
[819.00 --> 820.92]  And that requires honesty.
[821.14 --> 822.66]  And that requires accountability.
[823.14 --> 825.26]  And there's a path to healing required.
[825.62 --> 828.36]  Forgiveness isn't simply tossing the pain aside.
[830.68 --> 832.30]  That's not how this goes.
[833.74 --> 837.60]  Folks, I've seen marriages survive and then eventually thrive again.
[837.60 --> 843.08]  When genuine confession leads to genuine forgiveness with a pathway to healing.
[843.08 --> 856.26]  And the one who is wronged needs to be deeply aware of how much forgiveness they also need in life.
[857.86 --> 860.38]  We don't stand on different ground.
[860.48 --> 861.90]  We all stand broken together.
[862.64 --> 864.58]  You know, and then this.
[864.74 --> 865.16]  Then this.
[866.48 --> 868.02]  Forgiveness is not merely a feeling.
[868.02 --> 869.02]  Forgiveness is not merely a feeling.
[869.02 --> 873.20]  You know, if you ask people who've been hurt, do you feel like forgiving?
[873.30 --> 874.42]  The answer is going to be no.
[875.68 --> 880.78]  There's going to be times when we have to choose to forgive even though our feelings say otherwise.
[882.02 --> 884.66]  Anyone here ever have a nasty fight with someone they love?
[886.44 --> 886.90]  Just me?
[887.44 --> 887.74]  Okay.
[888.70 --> 889.14]  Okay.
[889.42 --> 889.72]  All right.
[889.72 --> 891.66]  Well, I'll share it with you.
[892.96 --> 899.76]  In the moments of intense feelings, things can be said that shouldn't have been said.
[899.82 --> 900.44]  You ever been there?
[901.30 --> 901.48]  Right?
[901.76 --> 906.26]  And maybe it felt pretty satisfying even saying those things in those moments.
[907.88 --> 909.10]  But they shouldn't have been said.
[909.10 --> 917.48]  But as one who knows the forgiveness of Jesus, I need to allow the Spirit of God to intervene in my thoughts.
[917.74 --> 923.92]  I need to choose humility before my Lord instead of being dictated by my feelings.
[925.50 --> 932.90]  And then I need to learn to ignore those strong feelings and choose to allow forgiveness and humility to redefine the broken moment.
[935.82 --> 939.00]  And this isn't about pretending we're not hurt.
[939.10 --> 943.84]  Or that we're going to excuse us or condone something.
[944.18 --> 947.94]  But it's not the place where the emotions run wild and dictate the moment.
[951.84 --> 959.88]  And then we surrender that moment to grace and to the love of the other to coming before the Lord somehow.
[960.62 --> 962.14]  And I'm not pretending that's easy.
[963.42 --> 965.90]  To follow Jesus even in those hard places.
[965.90 --> 968.16]  Jesus who sat on the cross.
[968.56 --> 969.64]  Here he is hanging on the cross.
[969.94 --> 972.36]  And he looks down at these people who put him there.
[972.56 --> 973.94]  And he says, Father, forgive them.
[974.22 --> 975.78]  They don't know what they're doing.
[977.40 --> 978.96]  Well, he didn't get up there accidentally.
[980.66 --> 981.02]  Right?
[981.18 --> 982.20]  But it's the same for me.
[982.24 --> 983.26]  I was thinking of that too.
[983.62 --> 985.86]  You know, I need to pray in my prayers for forgiveness.
[986.20 --> 987.06]  Father, forgive me.
[987.06 --> 988.46]  I don't know what I'm doing.
[992.12 --> 993.56]  I think I do.
[995.02 --> 996.02]  But I don't.
[996.96 --> 997.88]  Forgive me for that.
[998.52 --> 1000.10]  I don't see all the implications.
[1000.30 --> 1001.42]  I don't see all the dynamics.
[1001.74 --> 1004.16]  I don't see all the pain that that person feels.
[1004.30 --> 1006.56]  And then I'm just thinking about me and being right and whatever.
[1007.52 --> 1008.42]  And then this.
[1008.66 --> 1011.40]  Forgiveness does not mean that something is not sin.
[1011.40 --> 1016.58]  Actually, just the opposite.
[1017.30 --> 1020.84]  Forgiveness is about seeing the sin.
[1022.14 --> 1025.50]  Sometimes sin is such a blank cover.
[1027.04 --> 1028.28]  Oh, forgive me my sins.
[1028.44 --> 1029.80]  I remember with my dad once.
[1030.38 --> 1032.82]  You know, he said, forgive me my sins.
[1033.16 --> 1034.18]  And he said, name one.
[1035.44 --> 1035.88]  Right?
[1036.40 --> 1037.42]  Yeah, that's fair.
[1038.44 --> 1039.38]  Could have said it to him too.
[1039.38 --> 1040.24]  But anyway, that doesn't matter.
[1041.40 --> 1050.38]  You know, in our Christian worldview, sometimes we have a tendency to want to let forgiveness be about minimizing the sin.
[1050.74 --> 1052.86]  You know, we say something, just let it go.
[1055.06 --> 1057.52]  And then abuse gets tolerated.
[1058.92 --> 1060.30]  After all, you're forgiven, right?
[1063.20 --> 1064.14]  It's not that.
[1064.14 --> 1068.14]  We need to name sin.
[1070.14 --> 1070.58]  Clearly.
[1071.68 --> 1073.32]  And then forgive.
[1073.78 --> 1075.06]  Or ask for forgiveness.
[1075.28 --> 1077.00]  Which means working toward health and healing.
[1078.90 --> 1082.88]  I don't know if, as a teacher, for many years, sometimes you had students.
[1083.42 --> 1085.46]  You know, you might say, hey, who did this?
[1085.62 --> 1086.06]  Sorry!
[1086.06 --> 1086.14]  Sorry!
[1087.56 --> 1089.04]  I didn't say anything yet.
[1089.06 --> 1090.60]  I didn't even name the offense.
[1090.72 --> 1091.86]  You're already saying, sorry.
[1092.74 --> 1093.10]  Right?
[1093.24 --> 1095.78]  Which was their way of just saying, okay, go away.
[1095.90 --> 1096.64]  I said sorry.
[1097.60 --> 1097.98]  Right?
[1098.20 --> 1099.64]  And sometimes we can be that way.
[1099.72 --> 1100.50]  We're just going to say, sorry!
[1101.18 --> 1101.90]  All done, right?
[1101.98 --> 1102.32]  Sorry!
[1103.54 --> 1104.80]  And it's a cheap sorry.
[1105.92 --> 1106.98]  And it doesn't cut it.
[1106.98 --> 1112.58]  Forgiveness and justice go hand in hand.
[1113.04 --> 1116.42]  Which is so different than forgiveness and payback.
[1116.68 --> 1117.76]  Forgiveness and vengeance.
[1118.12 --> 1119.56]  Forgiveness and getting even.
[1122.56 --> 1131.04]  And then with that in mind, forgiveness is not allowing wrongdoers to carry on with their wrongdoing.
[1134.12 --> 1136.12]  Anyone here remember Rachel Denhollander?
[1136.98 --> 1146.66]  She was the gal, the American Olympic gymnast, who was one of the people abused by Larry Nassar.
[1148.28 --> 1153.74]  Larry Nassar was the doctor that abused a whole bunch of women.
[1155.82 --> 1162.56]  And Denhollander became the last of 150 survivors, all women, almost all of them gymnasts,
[1162.56 --> 1166.12]  to share their impact statement in court with Nassar.
[1166.98 --> 1174.14]  Who was convicted of seven counts of first degree criminal sexual contact and sentenced up to 175 years in jail.
[1178.26 --> 1180.10]  She says this to him in court.
[1180.20 --> 1180.70]  Picture that.
[1181.94 --> 1183.10]  She's speaking directly to him.
[1183.10 --> 1189.56]  I pray you experience the soul crushing weight of guilt.
[1191.10 --> 1197.58]  So that you may someday experience true repentance and true forgiveness from God.
[1197.74 --> 1200.40]  Which you need far more than forgiveness from me.
[1200.58 --> 1203.14]  Although I extend that to you as well.
[1203.14 --> 1211.38]  She was asked in an interview.
[1212.26 --> 1214.50]  What does it mean that you forgive Larry Nassar?
[1215.78 --> 1216.62]  And she says,
[1216.62 --> 1222.98]  It means that I trust in God's justice and I release bitterness and anger and desire for personal vengeance.
[1223.18 --> 1227.06]  It does not mean that I minimize or mitigate or excuse what he has done.
[1227.30 --> 1231.10]  It does not mean that I pursue justice on earth any less zealously.
[1231.10 --> 1236.18]  It simply means I release personal vengeance against him and I trust God's justice.
[1236.18 --> 1240.86]  How does that line up with your idea of forgiveness?
[1247.70 --> 1258.92]  There's too many horrible stories of abuse, particularly when they happen in churches where people almost want to protect the abuser.
[1258.92 --> 1261.82]  And not call him to task.
[1264.14 --> 1265.10]  It's not right.
[1266.22 --> 1270.34]  Then Hollander had to actually leave the church she was in because of things like that.
[1273.56 --> 1277.66]  And with that in mind, forgiveness isn't a one moment thing.
[1277.74 --> 1279.34]  And it isn't one and done.
[1282.30 --> 1283.84]  It isn't really a season.
[1283.84 --> 1284.82]  It's a discipline.
[1285.04 --> 1286.06]  It's a practice.
[1286.06 --> 1290.88]  It involves following and forgiving like Jesus and learning to do that.
[1293.62 --> 1295.86]  So this is a practice you work on.
[1297.24 --> 1299.64]  And now some thoughts around what forgiveness is.
[1300.80 --> 1304.14]  Forgiveness is when we return to God the right to carry out justice.
[1304.40 --> 1305.66]  Now and in the days to come.
[1306.28 --> 1311.96]  Too often, we can feel like we know justice better than God himself.
[1313.34 --> 1313.68]  You know, right?
[1313.74 --> 1314.78]  We want to say, Come on, God.
[1314.82 --> 1315.56]  Get going on this one.
[1315.64 --> 1316.02]  Do this.
[1316.14 --> 1317.18]  This is what I think should be done.
[1317.66 --> 1321.66]  And in Scripture, we read at one point, Vengeance is mine, says the Lord.
[1322.86 --> 1324.40]  In a way, saying, Okay, you want vengeance?
[1324.50 --> 1325.52]  Well, leave it to God.
[1325.64 --> 1327.40]  Because that vengeance will actually be justice.
[1328.40 --> 1331.12]  We have to be careful in our desires for vengeance.
[1331.80 --> 1332.68]  For getting even.
[1333.14 --> 1334.50]  As if we get it.
[1335.60 --> 1337.54]  We confess God knows best.
[1338.54 --> 1339.94]  And so we give God the reins.
[1339.94 --> 1340.54]  Forgiveness.
[1340.54 --> 1344.62]  But again, that doesn't mean that we don't seek justice like Rachel and Hollander did, for example.
[1345.34 --> 1349.16]  Forgiveness is when we desire to do good instead of evil.
[1349.16 --> 1352.46]  But it's not that we don't name the evil.
[1352.46 --> 1358.06]  It frees us up to seek good.
[1358.06 --> 1360.18]  Or to seek good out of harm.
[1360.18 --> 1363.36]  Like then Hollander did.
[1363.36 --> 1369.84]  So yes, there's going to be consequences for bad behavior with the hope of good for the one who harmed us.
[1370.24 --> 1370.40]  Right?
[1370.44 --> 1371.50]  And that's what Rachel was doing.
[1371.50 --> 1376.28]  And I hope you feel the extent, the depth of your sin.
[1379.60 --> 1384.70]  So you can throw yourself like the woman out of our first story.
[1385.04 --> 1389.96]  Like the woman at Jesus' feet and seek his grace in desperation.
[1392.52 --> 1396.30]  How many of you pray desperate prayers for grace?
[1396.30 --> 1396.36]  Grace.
[1401.50 --> 1410.30]  Forgiveness is when we seek that good will eventually come.
[1411.84 --> 1414.48]  Scripture often talks about beauty for ashes.
[1414.84 --> 1414.94]  Right?
[1415.32 --> 1417.60]  Out of the burnt up ashes comes good.
[1418.56 --> 1420.66]  And then forgiveness is an unmerited gift.
[1420.80 --> 1421.70]  It isn't earned.
[1421.82 --> 1422.48]  It's given.
[1423.10 --> 1424.84]  We may tend to be like the Pharisee.
[1424.92 --> 1425.08]  Right?
[1425.72 --> 1426.74]  Evil is evil.
[1426.92 --> 1427.40]  Avoid it.
[1427.48 --> 1430.78]  Keep yourself clean by avoiding those who are unclean because you're better than them.
[1430.78 --> 1435.46]  Now, I'm not suggesting that sometimes we don't avoid stepping into evil places.
[1435.52 --> 1437.38]  Of course, that's just wise.
[1437.80 --> 1442.34]  But we don't, like we shouldn't be driving to Vancouver on East Hastings and looking around and saying,
[1442.40 --> 1443.56]  Oh, look at all these losers.
[1447.96 --> 1448.96]  Because we're better.
[1452.06 --> 1453.40]  I could never be an addict.
[1453.40 --> 1453.96]  No?
[1454.96 --> 1455.14]  No?
[1456.64 --> 1456.96]  Okay.
[1458.36 --> 1458.92]  I don't know.
[1459.44 --> 1460.86]  Depends how you define addiction, I guess.
[1461.08 --> 1461.42]  But anyways.
[1462.48 --> 1465.64]  You know, and then forgiveness may happen, but it'll happen this way.
[1465.70 --> 1471.20]  It'll see, you know, yeah, when you're all cleaned up, when you're all cleaned up, you come back to me and then I'll forgive you.
[1471.84 --> 1472.06]  Right?
[1472.14 --> 1473.16]  And then we play that game.
[1473.78 --> 1473.94]  Right?
[1473.94 --> 1477.82]  As opposed to where Scripture says, while we were yet sinners, Christ came to us.
[1478.32 --> 1481.34]  While in the middle of the brokenness, somehow forgiveness is happening.
[1481.50 --> 1483.10]  That doesn't mean the story's over.
[1483.88 --> 1485.32]  But forgiveness starts then.
[1485.90 --> 1488.14]  It's not easy to forgive.
[1488.14 --> 1494.60]  You know, I think of my dad.
[1494.64 --> 1495.76]  He passed away a number of years ago.
[1496.68 --> 1499.12]  But he caused me a ton of pain in our family.
[1500.70 --> 1502.12]  Lots of rage issues.
[1503.52 --> 1504.42]  Some unfaithfulness.
[1510.16 --> 1510.56]  Yeah.
[1511.90 --> 1513.38]  Had to deal with a lot of counseling.
[1513.90 --> 1514.54]  Lots of prayer.
[1515.66 --> 1516.52]  I read a quote.
[1516.52 --> 1519.62]  It says, forgiveness is setting someone free and realizing that person is you.
[1524.82 --> 1528.56]  When I forgave, I felt more free to love my broken dad.
[1529.98 --> 1531.60]  There was a lot of good in him, too.
[1532.50 --> 1533.68]  Nobody's all of one thing.
[1534.52 --> 1541.22]  And I learned to become far more aware of the sin of my own life because I had to remember I'm not better than my dad.
[1546.52 --> 1547.52]  I'm not better than my dad.
[1547.52 --> 1548.48]  I'm not better than my dad.
[1548.48 --> 1548.98]  I'm not better than my dad.
[1548.98 --> 1549.16]  I'm not better than my dad.
[1549.16 --> 1550.40]  Forgiveness frees us.
[1550.96 --> 1553.80]  And it frees us to forgive others and love others.
[1553.80 --> 1567.08]  You know, I hear too often these terrible stories of people who, families, you know, where they haven't talked to a mother not talking to her daughter for 20 years.
[1567.22 --> 1570.18]  Or a dad never wanting to see a family member again.
[1570.52 --> 1572.42]  You go, how does that even happen?
[1572.42 --> 1579.10]  Hebrews 12.
[1580.40 --> 1584.52]  It says, see to it that no one falls short of the grace of God.
[1584.58 --> 1585.72]  Isn't that a fascinating line?
[1586.06 --> 1587.78]  No one falls short of the grace of God.
[1588.02 --> 1588.18]  What?
[1588.28 --> 1589.14]  We can come up short?
[1589.34 --> 1590.14]  Yeah, we can.
[1590.28 --> 1591.58]  What happens when we come up short?
[1592.06 --> 1593.82]  And that no bitter root grows.
[1594.00 --> 1594.90]  That's what happens.
[1595.12 --> 1596.68]  It causes trouble and defiles many.
[1597.06 --> 1598.08]  That's what happens, right?
[1598.16 --> 1600.26]  You either forgive or you become bitter.
[1600.26 --> 1602.16]  Those seem to be the options.
[1606.08 --> 1607.82]  Unforgiveness enslaves us.
[1607.90 --> 1608.82]  I've seen it.
[1609.72 --> 1622.70]  And we need to go to that place of pain and forgiveness to uproot that bitterness so that we can let go of the grudges and let go of the anger and let go of the hatred.
[1622.94 --> 1624.22]  They wronged me so much.
[1624.64 --> 1625.18]  Yes.
[1626.14 --> 1626.92]  Now what?
[1626.92 --> 1626.96]  Now what?
[1630.26 --> 1633.90]  We need to learn to forgive because Christ forgives.
[1634.48 --> 1640.14]  And God takes it all and he gives you his peace and his freedom and his spirit and his healing.
[1643.02 --> 1645.60]  And in this, we do forgiveness in community.
[1646.22 --> 1648.52]  This needs to be a forgiving community.
[1648.52 --> 1651.74]  James 5, we read,
[1652.10 --> 1656.26]  Therefore, confess your sins to each other and pray for each other that you may, what?
[1656.34 --> 1657.12]  Be healed.
[1657.82 --> 1660.00]  The prayer of the righteous person is powerful and effective.
[1660.16 --> 1661.16]  What a wonderful thing.
[1661.52 --> 1669.16]  If I tell you my brokenness, somebody that I trust, if I tell you somehow that helps me, do I want to do that?
[1669.50 --> 1670.56]  Absolutely not.
[1670.56 --> 1678.62]  And I might add, confess the pain of the sin to one another that you may be healed too.
[1679.00 --> 1684.84]  Know the pain you caused and share the pain you received in these moments of confession.
[1684.84 --> 1689.36]  This is the process of healing and forgiveness.
[1689.92 --> 1691.40]  We're going to talk more about that, I'm sure.
[1692.68 --> 1694.42]  And I want you to practice this.
[1695.30 --> 1696.22]  This week maybe.
[1696.54 --> 1698.06]  Maybe with some trusted other.
[1698.40 --> 1700.86]  Reflect on how you've been forgiven by God.
[1701.24 --> 1704.24]  Reflect on it and then get specific with somebody.
[1708.32 --> 1709.82]  And go to the harder places.
[1709.82 --> 1712.30]  Well, once I got a little bit mad at somebody.
[1712.62 --> 1714.12]  Well, you know what I mean?
[1717.00 --> 1720.62]  Once in anger, I said this horrible thing.
[1720.72 --> 1722.34]  Okay, okay, we're getting somewhere now.
[1724.98 --> 1728.92]  So that we can be moved to healing.
[1729.26 --> 1732.02]  Otherwise, if you don't, it's too often.
[1732.14 --> 1734.98]  If you're the one who falls into the sin and you just can't seem to get rid of it.
[1735.24 --> 1736.98]  Otherwise, it turns into self-loathing.
[1736.98 --> 1740.72]  And in any addiction, self-loathing is a key factor here.
[1741.04 --> 1748.50]  I hate myself, which drives me now back to the behavior because somehow that pretends to satisfy me.
[1748.70 --> 1749.92]  And it doesn't.
[1755.92 --> 1763.22]  And out of all of that, when we learn to forgive in Christ-like ways, we find freedom.
[1763.22 --> 1763.72]  Right?
[1766.72 --> 1770.32]  AA isn't a bunch of people saying, so what'd you do?
[1770.44 --> 1770.66]  Nothing.
[1772.16 --> 1772.98]  Well, what'd you do?
[1773.02 --> 1773.64]  Oh, nothing either.
[1774.32 --> 1774.50]  Right?
[1774.58 --> 1776.02]  It's a whole thing is honesty.
[1777.20 --> 1780.26]  Or sex addicts, anonymous, or whatever group you want to name.
[1780.34 --> 1782.96]  Or you could find probably four more groups.
[1784.30 --> 1785.60]  Forgiveness is hard.
[1785.94 --> 1788.00]  We feel vulnerable in it, of course.
[1788.00 --> 1800.08]  When I hurt my wife's heart, and I have, there's a piece of me that just wants to move on.
[1801.44 --> 1802.34]  Okay, okay, I'm sorry.
[1803.24 --> 1803.92]  Kind of like the kid.
[1804.98 --> 1806.14]  And I want to move on.
[1806.26 --> 1807.82]  And I want to get past it quick.
[1808.32 --> 1811.62]  Because I don't want to own the fact that I hurt my wife's heart.
[1811.62 --> 1813.56]  But it needs to be owned.
[1813.92 --> 1815.40]  I need to say it to my Lord.
[1815.58 --> 1817.10]  And I need to say it to my wife.
[1817.38 --> 1818.96]  And we need to learn to do better.
[1825.62 --> 1829.54]  Trust that God is at work in this path of forgiveness.
[1830.34 --> 1833.88]  To heal you, and to heal those you've harmed.
[1833.88 --> 1841.54]  Where are those places where you need to confess first to God, and then to someone you've hurt?
[1841.82 --> 1843.64]  Maybe even unintentionally.
[1844.70 --> 1847.00]  And it doesn't always get all cleaned up here.
[1847.14 --> 1852.42]  Den Haulander talked about her experiences as being, this process of forgiveness for her as being lifelong.
[1852.90 --> 1855.66]  And she said, this side of heaven we don't get complete restoration.
[1855.66 --> 1861.80]  I never got a confession from my dad that, you know, it was all okay now.
[1862.32 --> 1864.54]  And that he owned all the stuff that he did.
[1864.82 --> 1866.02]  Really never got there.
[1867.48 --> 1870.48]  But God brought me healing anyway, over time.
[1870.82 --> 1875.72]  As I said, through counseling, through prayer, through talking with people, through reading, through wrestling, through reflecting.
[1876.34 --> 1877.70]  And there's more healing to come.
[1878.04 --> 1879.92]  I've experienced the power of forgiveness.
[1880.56 --> 1883.14]  My holy God gave his only son.
[1883.14 --> 1889.08]  So I, so I could receive forgiveness.
[1890.12 --> 1892.40]  So I could receive his love.
[1895.18 --> 1899.30]  And then forgive because I needed to follow Jesus in his grace and love.
[1902.86 --> 1904.96]  Let me conclude with a story.
[1905.32 --> 1908.08]  One that expresses the power of forgiveness in community.
[1910.46 --> 1912.76]  There was an event that was called the Awakening.
[1913.14 --> 1915.58]  At Mötlingen, Germany.
[1915.76 --> 1917.58]  On New Year's Eve, 1843.
[1919.20 --> 1921.60]  There was a young man there, known for his wild living.
[1922.14 --> 1923.24]  And his violent temper.
[1923.34 --> 1926.60]  And he came to the door of Pastor Christoph Blumhart.
[1926.82 --> 1928.30]  Now this is a pastor.
[1928.50 --> 1929.18]  Not a priest.
[1929.28 --> 1930.66]  Sometimes in the Catholic tradition, right?
[1930.66 --> 1931.70]  We have a confession booth.
[1931.96 --> 1933.02]  So this was not that.
[1934.08 --> 1936.36]  This young man came to Blumhart's door.
[1936.36 --> 1939.76]  And he came to confess his sins.
[1939.76 --> 1940.30]  And he came to confess his sins.
[1942.92 --> 1947.38]  This created quite a stir in the community somehow.
[1947.38 --> 1952.62]  It created an unprecedented wave of confession in that community.
[1952.62 --> 1958.18]  Where one remorseful villager after another came to reveal and confess sins and reconcile.
[1958.18 --> 1962.66]  And it pierced the heart of people from all walks of life.
[1962.90 --> 1969.12]  And they felt compelled from then on to try to live out a different life than their old ways.
[1969.12 --> 1972.80]  And stolen goods were returned.
[1973.18 --> 1974.74]  And enemies were reconciled.
[1975.04 --> 1976.30]  And marriages were healed.
[1976.82 --> 1978.92]  And crimes were confessed to.
[1979.20 --> 1980.76]  And grudges were let go.
[1984.28 --> 1985.66]  Wouldn't that have been fascinating?
[1989.66 --> 1991.80]  Oh, so you stole that.
[1991.80 --> 1995.18]  And now we have to have forgiveness again.
[1996.28 --> 1998.06]  You see a cycle thing happening there.
[1998.62 --> 2000.88]  And Jesus offered his followers the keys of the kingdom.
[2001.08 --> 2002.04]  We read that in scripture.
[2002.50 --> 2004.60]  And we hold the key of forgiveness in our hands.
[2005.42 --> 2008.92]  And then we must choose whether or not we will use it.
[2010.68 --> 2014.24]  Christ wants to use our hands, wounded as they may be,
[2014.24 --> 2019.44]  to extend his forgiveness and his grace to the world.
[2019.44 --> 2023.20]  What will you do with that key?
[2025.38 --> 2026.04]  Let's pray.
[2029.94 --> 2031.72]  Lord God, we...
[2031.72 --> 2037.00]  Father, we come before you always in need of grace.
[2038.30 --> 2043.92]  Lord, might we be truly honest with you and ourselves and with those we trust.
[2045.60 --> 2048.58]  Might we learn to forgive as you forgave.
[2048.58 --> 2053.52]  Might we learn to release grudges and release hatred and release pain.
[2054.78 --> 2057.52]  And might we find ways to enter into grace.
[2058.98 --> 2060.86]  Even if that grace isn't returned.
[2062.40 --> 2068.12]  Father God, help us to understand how deep our sin is.
[2068.18 --> 2071.78]  So that we can understand how deep your love and grace are.
[2072.10 --> 2072.78]  Let's unpack what we know.
[2072.78 --> 2098.22]  Let's see.