Based on the context and the answer, generate a question. 

Context: He was a part of me in a way I would never know while living . And here , in the distorted heaven projected around me , I finally could . And damn if the words did n't make tears sting in my eyes . I would have been embarrassed , but I think I was past all that .

Answer:

If you have true hardship then small things like public emotion become meaningless .



Why was I past all that ?